Feb 19, 2009 06:57
It's my birthday... I wish Pa was here... It doesn't feel right without him. How can I smile, eat cake, celebrate without him? I will never stop missing him or loving him... I just wish he was here. I would never ask for anything again in my life if I could just have ten minutes to talk to Pa again... But I can't, he'd dead. I know I need to face that, but I just can't fully come to terms with it. I feel like not just my birthday, but my life was ruined when I lost Pa. I am trying to have a good day though...
It's way too early to be awake so I'm going back to bed for a while. But when I get up, I'll probably go out for a while then it's dinner with the fam. After that I'm not exactly sure what I'm doing, but I'll figure something out...
So I've been talking to Corey a little bit, nothing major, but it's nice to know that he still remembers I exist lol... I still really like him and I still have NO fucking idea where I stand with him... that might have to wait until we get back to school... if we get back from break and he has no interest in hanging out, I know I was right before when I said this little thing is done. But it might not be... I am probably just creating false hopes for myself... Whatever, fuck it all... I don't give a shit, I'll just go with the flow and see where it takes me.