Friendship doesn't exist in my life.

[christina02l]

For months now i have been bottling things up. I don't think that anyone has noticed. When I quit smoking and drinking i felt like i lost a great deal of friends. I realized that there where people that just associated with me because i smoked pot. Some of my very close friends don't even bother to call me or hang out. I really didn't think that

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hey i don't know what i will say to help

[notfalling]

Yah , Ever sense i stoped smoking it's been different. It's like i don't even carry my cell phone anymore. noone calls beacuse they are all getting fucked up and i just don't care anymore. I feel like being alone or something and playing guitar with a stack. Then i get a call for favors like money or a pipe and smokes. I don't know what to do , i don't sleep and i feel ansy and just not right. I can't really explain it. I might as well say screw hanging out and start working for my uncle on the weekends.The friend i did have that got back from rehab came back and we hang out for a couple of days.well He started smoking again and has had his one track mind for bud ,even know it's not considered a hard drug and addictive.I just feel i'm in a simalir situation. i wish i had a g/f or somebody to be thare but nope i'v been single for more then a year and a half.
I finally got my community service done so i got that out of the way. I wish i could do something to help but i'm not the best friend i think. I'm always thare but i'm not always entertaining. I will come visit though, but give me a call sometime to dump the shit or something. Talk to you later.