Dude! An actual post!
So, yeah, I thought about looking up the last time I posted something other than a quiz or meme, but I figured it would be depressing. Maybe about this time last year? God only knows. (If any of you look it up and post it as a comment, I'll smite you!)
Things are looking up today after having been down all week, and that combined with Caribou Coffee, my new desk and the almost-melted snow made me introspective, I guess. (BTW,
Nice, huh? Especially for IKEA furniture secondhand through craigslist. I know we said we didn't want to have any IKEA furniture. But their office stuff is okay. It's their subdivided bedrooms and kitchens with "Swedish tendencies" that are a litlle much. Right mendeia?
Really, this has been a bad week. I have done no schoolwork, for one thing. I've been completely unable to focus. Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday I was unusually anxious, too. This all started Sunday night when we discovered that I had locked my keys in my truck and I had a breakdown (me, not the truck). Steven rescued the keys (thank God for coathangers and the Worst Case Scenario books!) and Kelly rescued me, but damage had been done. Then, between the time change and Kelly's crazy sales meeting hours, I really didn't get a chance to properly sleep it off. I never sleep well when the weather is changing anyway. (I wonder if that's why I sleep better here than Columbus, fewer weather changes? Huh.) So my week is gone and suddenly it is as if I have finally woken up on Monday morning, only I've missed 4 1/2 days. Grr. It's a strange feeling.
Now, I know this could have been much worse. It could have happened when I was on one of my prior medications, or no medication at all. Realistically, if I had to have a bad week anyway, I'd much prefer to have a useless week to a scared-of-everything-but-Kelly week or a too-depressed-to-play-a-game week. I've had enough of both of those for one lifetime! It's frustrating to not be "normal", but I've never been normal and I will never be normal, and I don't really want to be normal anyway. I wanted to understand what was different, and now that I've given it a name I'm learning to appreciate it rather than fight it. Still, there are parts I need to fight. Like this week. Ugh.
I'm sure going to spend tomorrow doing work. I was aiming to be done by tomorrow, and I was on track, too, until about Sunday. Eh. I do what I can, and what I can't do isn't worth worrying about until I can do it.
Things are looking up today after having been down all week, and that combined with Caribou Coffee, my new desk and the almost-melted snow made me introspective, I guess. (BTW,
Nice, huh? Especially for IKEA furniture secondhand through craigslist. I know we said we didn't want to have any IKEA furniture. But their office stuff is okay. It's their subdivided bedrooms and kitchens with "Swedish tendencies" that are a litlle much. Right mendeia?
Really, this has been a bad week. I have done no schoolwork, for one thing. I've been completely unable to focus. Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday I was unusually anxious, too. This all started Sunday night when we discovered that I had locked my keys in my truck and I had a breakdown (me, not the truck). Steven rescued the keys (thank God for coathangers and the Worst Case Scenario books!) and Kelly rescued me, but damage had been done. Then, between the time change and Kelly's crazy sales meeting hours, I really didn't get a chance to properly sleep it off. I never sleep well when the weather is changing anyway. (I wonder if that's why I sleep better here than Columbus, fewer weather changes? Huh.) So my week is gone and suddenly it is as if I have finally woken up on Monday morning, only I've missed 4 1/2 days. Grr. It's a strange feeling.
Now, I know this could have been much worse. It could have happened when I was on one of my prior medications, or no medication at all. Realistically, if I had to have a bad week anyway, I'd much prefer to have a useless week to a scared-of-everything-but-Kelly week or a too-depressed-to-play-a-game week. I've had enough of both of those for one lifetime! It's frustrating to not be "normal", but I've never been normal and I will never be normal, and I don't really want to be normal anyway. I wanted to understand what was different, and now that I've given it a name I'm learning to appreciate it rather than fight it. Still, there are parts I need to fight. Like this week. Ugh.
I'm sure going to spend tomorrow doing work. I was aiming to be done by tomorrow, and I was on track, too, until about Sunday. Eh. I do what I can, and what I can't do isn't worth worrying about until I can do it.