thoughts...
I was talking to Nick earlier.... about life and things like that. I was telling how I was talking to my therapist yesterday about how people are always trying to fill the void in their life with things or people. We got to talking about it... and the need for completion... and i said this,... and i think that it makes a lot of sense...
everyone longs to be loved/completed by someone else.. but the more i think about it it makes more sense to me that two people come together to make a two part team and not one whole. not to be completed, but to help to complete. and i think that if that isn't the attitude that people have, the recipe is one for disaster.
Like... how can you ever love someone truly if you don't love yourself? How can you ever really feel make someone feel validated, if you yourself aren't complete and aren't sure what it is you're looking for? If you have no goals, how can you reach them? I think that before we (meaning anyone) jump into a relationship, we all need to be ready for life to throw a curve ball. And we need to know whether or not it is dating to date, or dating for life. Are you dating because you want someone to hold you.... or are you dating because you want to settle down... because you're ready for that level of committment? all of this hocus pocus and back and forth that people do is PAINFUL... why commit your heart to someone who can't nurture it.... why commit ideas to something, attach emotion to something, unless you are relatively close to sure that it can be something real, something permanent? We ARE designed for love... and there is ONE person out there who is perfect. A perfect match. If you are so blinded by yourself or by lust, you might miss the perfect opportunity when it comes along. God won't leave you hanging... He's perfect, and His timing is perfect. We all just have to suck it up and really learn to trust Him. I am in no way saying that this is an easy task... but it's a very important one. God does not want us to be unhappy... He wants us to love and love truly and deeply and richly... it was not and is not His will for people to be hurt by one another so deeply. Love is not supposed to be laughable. Relationships are serious, sex is a big deal, and marriage was created to be permanent, not fleeting (but that's another rant).
So... maybe what I'm saying is take a step back. You are where you are for a reason. The people in your life are there for a reason. And no matter what you're doing, there's a reason. But think about it... if you're in a relationship, are you happy? Do you feel like you could survive and still be whole without the other person? Or are you trying to plug up holes with someone else. The way I see it.... we all should stop being so anxious to find completion in another human and seek happiness in other things.... within ourselves. When it happens, it'll happen.
okay... i'm done.
everyone longs to be loved/completed by someone else.. but the more i think about it it makes more sense to me that two people come together to make a two part team and not one whole. not to be completed, but to help to complete. and i think that if that isn't the attitude that people have, the recipe is one for disaster.
Like... how can you ever love someone truly if you don't love yourself? How can you ever really feel make someone feel validated, if you yourself aren't complete and aren't sure what it is you're looking for? If you have no goals, how can you reach them? I think that before we (meaning anyone) jump into a relationship, we all need to be ready for life to throw a curve ball. And we need to know whether or not it is dating to date, or dating for life. Are you dating because you want someone to hold you.... or are you dating because you want to settle down... because you're ready for that level of committment? all of this hocus pocus and back and forth that people do is PAINFUL... why commit your heart to someone who can't nurture it.... why commit ideas to something, attach emotion to something, unless you are relatively close to sure that it can be something real, something permanent? We ARE designed for love... and there is ONE person out there who is perfect. A perfect match. If you are so blinded by yourself or by lust, you might miss the perfect opportunity when it comes along. God won't leave you hanging... He's perfect, and His timing is perfect. We all just have to suck it up and really learn to trust Him. I am in no way saying that this is an easy task... but it's a very important one. God does not want us to be unhappy... He wants us to love and love truly and deeply and richly... it was not and is not His will for people to be hurt by one another so deeply. Love is not supposed to be laughable. Relationships are serious, sex is a big deal, and marriage was created to be permanent, not fleeting (but that's another rant).
So... maybe what I'm saying is take a step back. You are where you are for a reason. The people in your life are there for a reason. And no matter what you're doing, there's a reason. But think about it... if you're in a relationship, are you happy? Do you feel like you could survive and still be whole without the other person? Or are you trying to plug up holes with someone else. The way I see it.... we all should stop being so anxious to find completion in another human and seek happiness in other things.... within ourselves. When it happens, it'll happen.
okay... i'm done.