HAPPY PILLS!!!
I just have to fully admit that I'm a chemically imbalanced human being whose full on anxiety comes in waves that if not medicated will make me drown in a pit of hopelessness, depression, anger, easy irritability, and nerves all rolled into my system so much that if I do not medicate, life becomes less then tolerable.
Even things that I would normally enjoy was annoying me. I have a strange yet easy comfort now on the happy pills that makes me much calm and much more rational then the unmedicated me feels. My first clue should of been when I went to take a class in college and I felt like I was going to pass out and my concentration levels were non-existant. When I got back on the happy pills, I was calm, studied better and passed the class barely...the barely part was because of my idiotic choice of not taking a final oral exam due to my stupid idea that I would bomb the exam so why take it? I have many regrets and that one will bite me in the ass on my deathbed.
Even disciplining myself is better. I go the gym regularly. I enjoy playing music with my band even if they don't know who Lou Reed is. I deal with living this life we were given.
Even things that I would normally enjoy was annoying me. I have a strange yet easy comfort now on the happy pills that makes me much calm and much more rational then the unmedicated me feels. My first clue should of been when I went to take a class in college and I felt like I was going to pass out and my concentration levels were non-existant. When I got back on the happy pills, I was calm, studied better and passed the class barely...the barely part was because of my idiotic choice of not taking a final oral exam due to my stupid idea that I would bomb the exam so why take it? I have many regrets and that one will bite me in the ass on my deathbed.
Even disciplining myself is better. I go the gym regularly. I enjoy playing music with my band even if they don't know who Lou Reed is. I deal with living this life we were given.