Once more into the breach dear friends...
When I came downstairs I was intent on taking a nap on the couch, cause I'm just that damn tired. But I can't... so I turn to my LJ instead...
My stepfather, is dying.
There are longer words to explain why, and how and how it was discovered and we were told. But the core of it is that he is dying, as I was told this afternoon at work.
One of the things that makes this so much worse is that initially my step-father and I didn't much like each other. There were three-four years of real intense dislike there. But we got past it. Then about a year after we started getting along, and had things to chat about etc. He started seeming a little strange. We all called it quirky... turned out it was probably the first traces of dementia.
But even then, years later when he had a stroke, and they put the pacemaker in, he seemed... okay. He was on alot of meds, his endurance wasn't so great and occasionally the oddest comment would come out of his mouth. 'What ya doing Curt?' 'Any of them that will stand still long enough.' And sometimes he'd confuse 1999 with 1969... but most of the time he was Curt.
Now, he is dying.
And the oddest thing is.. that he's still Curt, pretty much as sound of mine as he had been, at least at the moment... just a bit yellow around the edges and the eyes. And in a month... maybe two if we're very lucky... he'll be gone.
Seven? Eight years ago? I wouldn't have cared. Now it pains me even more that we had those years where we couldn't stand each other because if what we missed when he .was. of sound mind and body.
So we have a month, maybe two... and he'll probably be up and around until the end. So we can fit in an awful lot. All in all, pretty fucked up week.
Good bye Curt.
My stepfather, is dying.
There are longer words to explain why, and how and how it was discovered and we were told. But the core of it is that he is dying, as I was told this afternoon at work.
One of the things that makes this so much worse is that initially my step-father and I didn't much like each other. There were three-four years of real intense dislike there. But we got past it. Then about a year after we started getting along, and had things to chat about etc. He started seeming a little strange. We all called it quirky... turned out it was probably the first traces of dementia.
But even then, years later when he had a stroke, and they put the pacemaker in, he seemed... okay. He was on alot of meds, his endurance wasn't so great and occasionally the oddest comment would come out of his mouth. 'What ya doing Curt?' 'Any of them that will stand still long enough.' And sometimes he'd confuse 1999 with 1969... but most of the time he was Curt.
Now, he is dying.
And the oddest thing is.. that he's still Curt, pretty much as sound of mine as he had been, at least at the moment... just a bit yellow around the edges and the eyes. And in a month... maybe two if we're very lucky... he'll be gone.
Seven? Eight years ago? I wouldn't have cared. Now it pains me even more that we had those years where we couldn't stand each other because if what we missed when he .was. of sound mind and body.
So we have a month, maybe two... and he'll probably be up and around until the end. So we can fit in an awful lot. All in all, pretty fucked up week.
Good bye Curt.