Drug Test Lady
Alright,
Drug Test Lady.
Here's the story,
I wake up this morning at 10:30 and decide that I should go and take my drug test for Best Buy.
I grab a cherry coke and a bottle of water (So I could pee my heart out, for the good people at "LabCorp")
I get there, and there's this big line.
WTF mate, So I sign in and give them the thumbs up I'm ready.
After about thirty minutes of people walking back there to pee, they call my name.
This horid voice I hear calls out "Chreetaper" so I jump up there.
She tells me, "Pee to this line" and points me into the bathroom. This cup was tall, but skinny, so I thought it would be easy.
I thought wrong.
Turns out, these "Drug" tests are fairly hard.
So after 5 minutes, she comes knocking at my door, "It takes tree minutes, you hab takin more dan pive" -traslation... Three minutes is all it takes, and you have spent more than five.
So I yell "Listen, I'm trying my hardest."
I never knew how hard it was to pee on command, I mean... really on command.
So I get out and she is furious. She tells me to throw the cup away and wash my hands.
She says "You hab to be prepared."
I respond by saying "Sorry! I didn't know I had to study for this test"
She tells me to go sit outside and drink water.
I do that, and thity seconds later, BAM, I gotta pee.
I run to her, and she yells at me, "You hab to wait, till im finis wid dis paperwork"
WTF!
I walk in circles
20 minutes pass.
Finally she calls me up.
She gives me the cup and draws the line halfway.
I took the thing "prepared"
It was the greatest pee this week. (Since it was the first day of the week... Trust me, I peed better on Saturday - insidejoke)
I effing pee all the way to the top until it overflowed.
I took it to the girl and threw it in her face (cap closed of course).
She was furious.
We didn't talk.
Then finally she gave me my papers and I was off.
I left off tell her "I hope you have a better day"
And before I left the door I silently said "you bitch"
I laughed to myself.
Drug Test Lady.
Here's the story,
I wake up this morning at 10:30 and decide that I should go and take my drug test for Best Buy.
I grab a cherry coke and a bottle of water (So I could pee my heart out, for the good people at "LabCorp")
I get there, and there's this big line.
WTF mate, So I sign in and give them the thumbs up I'm ready.
After about thirty minutes of people walking back there to pee, they call my name.
This horid voice I hear calls out "Chreetaper" so I jump up there.
She tells me, "Pee to this line" and points me into the bathroom. This cup was tall, but skinny, so I thought it would be easy.
I thought wrong.
Turns out, these "Drug" tests are fairly hard.
So after 5 minutes, she comes knocking at my door, "It takes tree minutes, you hab takin more dan pive" -traslation... Three minutes is all it takes, and you have spent more than five.
So I yell "Listen, I'm trying my hardest."
I never knew how hard it was to pee on command, I mean... really on command.
So I get out and she is furious. She tells me to throw the cup away and wash my hands.
She says "You hab to be prepared."
I respond by saying "Sorry! I didn't know I had to study for this test"
She tells me to go sit outside and drink water.
I do that, and thity seconds later, BAM, I gotta pee.
I run to her, and she yells at me, "You hab to wait, till im finis wid dis paperwork"
WTF!
I walk in circles
20 minutes pass.
Finally she calls me up.
She gives me the cup and draws the line halfway.
I took the thing "prepared"
It was the greatest pee this week. (Since it was the first day of the week... Trust me, I peed better on Saturday - insidejoke)
I effing pee all the way to the top until it overflowed.
I took it to the girl and threw it in her face (cap closed of course).
She was furious.
We didn't talk.
Then finally she gave me my papers and I was off.
I left off tell her "I hope you have a better day"
And before I left the door I silently said "you bitch"
I laughed to myself.