(no subject)
I've been away from home since Friday, and I've moved from bed to bed. My sleep is disrupted each night and I find I have sweat down my spine and a pulse in my palms. My bones stretch and creak when I wake. I watch him play those old games, made in 1985, Super Mario Bros. and he mutters like I always assumed boys did, before he turns his head to see me watching. And maybe he'll kiss me but if he doesnt it's ok but he's right there and I can see him as clearly as he can see me.
I'm daydreaming of spiders recently, and petals and pamplemousse, because I'm desperate for some calm, for sleep without a frown. It's upsetting to realise that sometimes the best things I know cannot ever be real.
The lack of solidity and stability makes life terrifying and beautiful as everybody knows, and I'm undecided if I'd want it any different. Maybe just a solid place to call home, would be nice.
I'm daydreaming of spiders recently, and petals and pamplemousse, because I'm desperate for some calm, for sleep without a frown. It's upsetting to realise that sometimes the best things I know cannot ever be real.
The lack of solidity and stability makes life terrifying and beautiful as everybody knows, and I'm undecided if I'd want it any different. Maybe just a solid place to call home, would be nice.