I Don't Wanna Be Your Girlfriend

[choiminhoe]

title: I don't wanna be your girlfriend
pairing: Zico/OC
note: I've written this two years ago and I think it's kinda stupid and dumb because I really have no idea what I was writing. It didn't turn out how it was supposed to be but I kinda leave it hanging(?). I found that I've written this earlier and I decided to share it. Hope you guys would like it. (Ps. The OC is in a girlgroup, just so you guys know.)

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Jieun knew the moment she said yes to Zico, she will get hurt in many ways. At first, of course, fans get hurt which hurts her. Some send her hate but some mature fans actually made her feel loved and safe. Of course, those girls who had a crush on Zico (the girl idols - that had crush on Zico) were obviously hurt too. This caused Jieun to get stabbed with daggers every time she passed by the hall backstage where all the girl groups were. Zico was the one who insisted that they should come clean and tell the whole world that they belong to each other. But Jieun didn’t mind getting hurt because of Zico. You know why?
She loves that guy a lot. In fact, she loves him more than she expected to. Sure, Zico is one hell of a funny guy. But there is just something about him that makes Jieun loves him a lot. However, Jieun doubted that her love for him is bigger than his love for her.
They haven’t met for weeks. They even rarely texted or even call each other. Jieun’s schedule was so tight she barely had any sleep.
She wasn’t sure what time was it but as soon as she woke up, she feel refreshed. After how many weeks of not having a good sleep, she finally had the feel of living again. Slipping from the thick blanket, she walked outside of her room to find there’s only Eunju in the living room, watching the TV. “Omo, omo, omo, Jieun-ah! Come here!” the older woman said as she motioned her Jieun to come to her.
Letting out a sigh, she shuffled lazily to her unnie and slumped herself on the sofa beside Eunju. It was Block B in Weekly Idol on the TV. It was the first time Block B had appeared in Weekly Idol. At the sight of her boyfriend, Jieun’s eyes widened and immediately straightened herself to concentrate on the TV.
The show was fine until they were on the question and answer section.
“So, Zico-ssi,” the fat host began with a slight malicious tone inside his voice. Jieun never like the host because he was such a busy body. She felt uncomfortable as the host addressed Zico. For some reason, she wanted to get inside the TV and drag Zico away from the mean looking host. “Your girlfriend is Nam Jieun - the small rapper - from the girl group Candy, right?”
“Ne,” Zico answered without hesitation as if he was proud to have Jieun as his girlfriend.
“There are rumors saying that your favourite is Ham Eunju-ssi. Is it true? But Jieun-ssi is your girlfriend,” the host said with a pitiful face as if he felt sorry but it was crystal clear that he didn’t regretted asking Zico such question.
Before they even got together, Zico had mentioned that his ideal type is Ham Eunju. Jieun is not one who gets jealous easily but it just pissed her off. Zico knew that she hate these type of stuff and sometimes, he used it just to annoy her. A part of Jieun didn’t really care as she was used to Zico saying those kind of stuff but another part her was begging for Zico to deny it because a) she loves him b) they’re together.
Zico’s lips curved into a grin and nodded eagerly, causing Eunju to gasp in surprised. “This jerk!!” Eunju commented.
“Yes, Eunju noona is my favourite,” he said without shame and then turn to the camera, “Jieun-ah, mianhae~”
Jieun blinked in boredom. Like a robot, she stood up and went straight to the bathroom - ignoring her unnie’s plea to hear her out.

After Candy finished their showcase, all of a sudden, a young woman which they assumed was a reporter came barging in with a cameraman. Seeing the pair, all of them bowed and greeted them. The reporter greeted back.
The interview started as soon as the reporter asked them to sit down. They were announced that they were filming live so they made a mental note to keep themselves calm. It started with a greeting and then introduction. After that, the reporter began to ask questions. Everything was fine and it went as smooth as silk. But then, the reporter turned to Jieun to ask her a question which wanted to make her lunge forward and snap the reporter’s neck into half.
“Jieun-ssi, what do you feel when Zico said that Eunju is his favourite?”
Since it was live and Jieun did not want to screw it up, she put on a bright smile and said, “Well, I felt nothing. It’s no big deal actually because in Block B, my favourite is Kwon Oppa.”
“Really?” The reporter asked in a surprised tone.
Jieun only gave her a small laugh and nodded.

At the same time, Block B was watching Candy’s Live Interview. Jaehyo was the most eager as he had not seen his ‘little’ sister for a long time. They have gathered in front of the TV to watch the live interview, including Zico.
“What the hell…” Zico muttered under his breath, only loud enough for him to hear.
The members then turned to Yukwon and began to tease him. A pink tint formed on Yukwon’s cheeks as the others began to tease him to no end. Zico boringly stared at the stupid six men and let out an infuriated sigh.
P.O turned to his hyung and gave him a wicked smile. “Guys, guys, guys!” he loudly said with his hands up in the air to attract his hyungs attention. As soon as all eyes were on him, he gave them a mischievous smile and eyed Zico, “Stop teasing Kwon hyung, someone is burning up over here.”
“Burning up?! Yah, Pyo Jihoon!” Zico yelled, his cheeks were getting red as he realized that P.O meant he was getting jealous. “I am not jealous!” he bellowed as he threw the nearest pillow to hit P.O on his face.
“Then why are you clenching your fist?”
“I am not even mad about that, I clenched my fist because it’s my habit!” everybody knew it was a lie.

After a few weeks later, Candy’s manager had told Candy that they were going to work for a new album. Although Candy do write the songs but there are times when the songs are modified by the professional lyricist. In this case, the manager decided that Candy would relax and their songs would be produced by the professional. Their songs had been recorded for a few days and when it came to the last song they’re recording, they were pretty surprised after they found out who was the producer.  All of them literally gasped - and the loudest would be Jieun.
“Jiho?” Jieun let out a gasp as Zico entered their recording room.
“Hello~” he called out as he waved his hands to the girls in the room. “I am here today to mentor you girls in the song I wrote.”
Hyunju chuckled as she nudged Jieun. “Didn’t know your boyfriend is our producer.”
“Didn’t see that coming either,” Jieun muttered back.
“Now, let us start, shall we?”
As usual, the singers would record first as Jieun and Nayeon tried to get the right beat for their rap parts. Jieun wasn’t sure whether Zico deliberately gave her the longest rap with more tongue twister than Nayeon. Even if they were in the same recording room, Jieun refused to look at Zico the whole time and she could see that Zico made no effort in talking to her or whatsoever.
As the others were recording, Zico kept on praising them, saying that they’ve got the perfect rhythm and are definitely a pro because they’ve played by the ear. Especially Eunju. He praised her to no end. “And the skirt you wear today is pretty cute too,” he added. Like, what does skirt have to do with singing?
Jieun rolled her eyes, she was annoyed with him. Zico never made any effort to look at how she was dressed and he never compliments her. Even if Jieun wear rubbish plastic as a dress, he would not look at her twice but when it comes to Eunju… gosh.
Jieun stood up and on her way to the recording booth, she kept on muttering the lyric and tried to memorize it.
She placed the lyric on the lyric stand and wore the headphones. Then, she looked straight at Zico, who had a bored expression written on his face. “What the hell,” Jieun muttered as she noticed his sudden change of expression. When the other girls were up, he was smiling to no end but when it comes to Jieun, he frowned and started to be all serious?
“Okay, I’m going to play the music,” Zico announced. His voice dropped two octaves. It was clear that he didn’t want to do anything with Jieun.
Jieun felt outrageous. She wanted to end it there and walk out of the recording room and maybe persuades their manager to bring her somewhere far away from Zico, maybe New York because she did not want to see his bloody face.
As soon as the music started, Jieun tried to feel the rhythm and began to search for her part. When she finally found her part, she glanced at the lyric and began to spit out the rap lyrics with perfect flow until…
“Stop! Stop! You’re being way too fast!” Zico interrupted and turned down the music.
“The fuck,” Jieun muttered under her breath. Not just he was being serious when it’s her turn, now he decided to treat her differently and harshly too?
“Let’s start all over again. I’m just going to play your part and that’s when you start rapping, okay?”
“Yeah sure,” annoyance can be heard in her voice.
“Holy hell, what is up with these two?” Hyunju muttered to Nayeon. Nayeon shrugged.
Jieun started all over again and every time she began to rap it’s either in the middle or when she was about to finish, Zico would interrupt her by saying that she got it all wrong and her tongue shouldn’t be so twisted and that if she’s a rapper she would take this more seriously and she should raise an octave higher and stop emphasizing the words as if she’s mad.
But she was mad.
She was mad because he had treated her differently - he was being strict with her and she hates it. She was mad because he’s a bloody idiot.
Even her members that were playing around behind Zico quieted down as Zico scolded her to no end.
“What the hell, Jieun-ah. I’ve told you to calm the fuck down and stop emphasizing each word this is not a song where you can throw your anger around. Please keep mind that this is a happy-go-lucky song you should stop sounding like a nagging grandma, alright? You should be more serious and stop playing around so much. If I knew that you’re not making any effort, I should’ve just given your part to Nayeon, I think even a sub rapper can rap better than you. Even Taeil hyung can rap better than you,” Zico said angrily as he pointed the pen he was holding to her.
Disbelief and hurt by what he had said, Jieun stared at him.
“Oh my god…” Sohee muttered. Even Hyunju, the one who fool around a lot, immediately shut up. All of their eyes widened.
“Do you think Jieunnie would explode?” Hyunju whispered to Eunju.
“I think so…” she whispered back.
Zico wasn’t sure why he was saying all of that. All of a sudden, he was there to torture and embarrassed and hurt Jieun. He wasn’t there to mentor them but he was there to kill Jieun slowly with his words. Everybody knows that Taeil can’t rap for shit but he was saying that the way Jieun rap is way lower than Taeil.
Jieun was hurt by his comment so she just stared at him. She was screaming on the inside and a wave of emotion crashed her. Jieun didn’t blink at all as she stared at him, her eyes stung and tears were starting to form.
“You know what,” Jieun muttered as she took off her headphone. “You can give Nayeon unnie all the rap parts for all I care. I do not want to take part in singing your bloody song.  I hope you will fucking choke on your words and DIE!!” Jieun screamed angrily and walked out of the recording room and slammed the door, causing the girls to jump in surprise.
Jieun never was mad as hell - at least she never showed it to people. Even Eunju - who was used seeing her angry - was surprised. Usually, Jieun would be mad only for a while and often she would just remain quiet and not utter a word just to make the person feel guilty. But Eunju assumed that she must be so fucking mad that she screamed at Zico in front of everybody and then ran outside of the room.
Zico blinked at the whole ordeal. Jieun would never yell at him and all of a sudden, she was screaming at him and hoping that he’ll die. “I...”

Jieun ran outside of the building in anger. When she noticed that no one was around her, she finally let the threatening tears to fall and sob. She sat on a bench outside and covered herself - she was sobbing and she was embarrassed because she was crying for Zico. “Stupid, stupid, stupid,” she muttered to herself between her sobs.
It was only a few seconds of Jieun’s moment of crying alone when she heard footsteps coming toward her direction. She refused to look up and pretended to wipe her tears and stopped sobbing.
“Jieun-ah?”
Jieun looked up to see Block B with concerned looks on her face.
“What happened?” Jaehyo asked.

“You’re such a sissy, Jiho,” Hyunju said with no fear as she crossed her legs. At the mention of his name, Zico turned around and glared at Hyunju. “If you are a man, you would’ve grabbed her wrist and stop her and explain before she decided to run somewhere.”
With that, Sohee squealed, “Like Joongki oppa~ and every other handsome guys in dramas~”
“This is life, not drama,” Zico said as a matter of fact.
“And you’re still a sissy,” Hyunju added. “Because you should actually look for her and chased her instead of blinking and let your brain slowly comprehend what was happening. You’re so slow, man.”
Zico only stared at Hyunju. As much as he dislikes her, there was truth in what she way saying. “Ouch, what the fuck,” he winced in pain as she could feel a hand slapped his head. He turned around to find Eunju with an angry look on her face.
“You know what to do, go down and look for her, idiot!”
“I’ve always wondered why Jieun love an idiot like you a lot,” Hyunju muttered.

“You don’t want to tell, hm?” Jaehyo asked as he squeezed her arm. The Block B members were worried and they kept on asking her what was wrong and they’d beat up the guy who made her cry but Jieun insist on telling them. Block B were there to hang out with Candy because Zico, after all, is the producer. Taeil figured they could have lunch together but they didn’t even entered the building as they saw Jieun was all alone, crying at the bench.
It should be Zico who calm her down and apologized but even after a few minutes downstairs, he didn’t even appear. Maybe it was true. He doesn’t love her anymore.
“Then let’s go somewhere, okay?” Yukwon suggested.
“Wah~ Are you going to pay, Kwon hyung?” Jihoon asked.
“No,” Yukwon answered. “But you will.”
Jieun only chuckled as she listened to them. With that, she stood up with them. Before they could even proceed any further, Jihoon had whispered something in Jieun’s ear. Jieun only let out a soft chuckle and ran to Yukwon. Yukwon, who was surprised by her sudden change of mood, bent down to let her whisper in his ear.
Yukwon then turned to her and gave a nervous smile. Jieun replied back with an aegyo grin.
Zico was just a few seconds too late and he had already witness the scene where Jieun was fine and was all smiles with Yukwon.

“The fuck?” Zico cursed as the operator kept on telling him the same thing all over again. The number is out of reach, please call again later.
“Are you sure she was fine and she was with your members but she was extremely close with Yukwon?” Eunju asked once again, still not believing that Jieun would quickly calm down after screaming at Zico in front of everybody. Jieun is not the type to calm down easily after throwing a tantrum and Eunju was flabbergasted.
“Yes, okay, yes. My eyes are still functioning properly.”
“That’s what you get for being a moron,” Hyunju suddenly interrupted. Sohee’s eyes widened at her sudden interruption.
Zico decided to ignore the bitch and continued dialing Jieun’s number but still, she didn’t pick up her phone.
“At least you finally get to feel what she feels,” Hyunju added again, wanting Zico to listen to her and learn his lesson.
“What the fuck are you going on about?”
“What does it feel after seeing her laughing with Yukwon but not you? Certainly she must’ve felt the same when you were laughing with Eunju yet you’re scolding her like hell,” for once, Hyunju sounded so mature and she made sense.
Eunju felt uneasy at the mention of her name but it was true, she couldn’t agree more.
Zico shut up.
“What does it feel, telling the whole world that you’re not his favourite although you’re her boyfriend? And moreover, she didn’t even apologize and clearly meant it and she didn’t even regret it?” Hyunju asked again. Sohee was about to stop her but she glared at her, making her whimpered. “But you know what the difference is, Jiho? She regretted it. She didn’t mean it. She tried to apologize but you never seem to pick up your fucking phone for her.”
Eunju turned to Hyunju, surprised by what her dongsaeng had said. Usually, Jieun would tell Eunju everything but she never told Eunju that she regretted saying that Yukwon is her favourite. She didn’t know Jieun was trying to apologize.
“Maybe she was the only one serious in this fucking relationship and it is all one sided. She loves you a lot yet you treat her like shit. I’ve promised to Jieun that I wouldn’t tell this to anyone but you’ve went overboard and I can’t stand it,” Hyunju suddenly lose her cool and stood up. With a dead glare at Zico, she walked out of the room.
And all of a sudden, Zico regretted not knowing the whole story.

The Block B members and Jieun were at the karaoke room. It was Taeil who sang so loudly and all of them cheered for him. Yukwon had asked Jieun to look for his wallet and phone as he went to the bathroom alone. Coincidentally, Yukwon’s phone vibrated. Without looking at the caller, she answered the phone.
“Hello?” It was Eunju.
“Oh! Eunju unnie.”

“What? It’s Jieun? Give me the phone!” Zico muttered and took Eunju’s phone and answered it. “Yah, Nam Jieun, where are you?”
Jieun rolled her eyes. So they were still in the recording room - he and Eunju. Jieun only scoffed, “yah? yAH? YAH? YAH!”
“What the hell? Why are you screaming?” Zico asked. “AND WHY ARE YOU ANSWERING YUKWON’S PHONE?”
“And why are you holding Eunju unnie’s phone?”
“Yah, I was w-”
And Jieun hung up.

“You know, Jieunnie, the only way to wash away all the sorrows and pain, is to have one glass of these,” Minhyuk said as he brought a glass of liquor up high and let Jieun examine it. “Your mind will be relaxed and you can let it all out without guilt.”
“What the - it’s just alcohol, oppa,” Jieun rolled her eyes. “But give that to me.”

Zico texted Taeil where they were and thankfully, Taeil was clueless to the situation and told Zico where they were. Zico immediately went to the karaoke place nearby and entered their room without caring the workers’ screams. As soon as he got into the room, he was surprised to see Jieun giggling. Jaehyo, who was singing during that time, stopped as he saw Zico barging in.
All of his members were acting like monkeys, singing loudly like they own the place. But Zico shoved the thought aside and his mind was more focused at the sight of Jieun. She was lying on Minhyuk’s lap while Minhyuk was playing with her hair. Both of them were giggling and spluttering nonsense.
“Yah!” he yelled as he charged forward and stopped in front of the two.
Jieun innocently looked up to her boyfriend, confused at why he was there. Minhyuk looked up to Zico, his eyes were drowsy but his fingers were still caressing her hair. Zico could smell the alcohol as the both of them laughed at Zico’s presence.
“Have these two been drinking?” Zico asked as he turned to the others.
Taeil shrugged. Jihoon blinked. Jaehyo continued to sing. Kyung didn’t even bother to look up and instead he took a selca and Yukwon, he refused to give two fucks.
“Someone answer me!” Zico yelled, causing his members to look up to him with a horrified expression.
“I really don’t know hyung. I was too busy searching for a song to sing,” Jihoon answered.
“For a second, Minhyuk was talking to her normally and the next split moment, both of them were acting as if they were drunk,” Taeil continued.
“Oh god,” Zico groaned. Zico hated drunken Minhyuk as he is the type to do sexual acts whenever he’s drunk. “By any chance, the two of them did … not… do… anything wrong right?”
All of them shook their heads. Zico let out a sigh of relief. As they noticed that the leader’s anger had subsided, they continued to do whatever they were doing and decided to ignore his presence.
“Zico ya~” Minhyuk called out.
Zico turned to him; his hand was on his forehead.
“Jieunnie…” he hiccupped. “She said she doesn’t want you anymore.”
Zico raised his eyebrow. Drunken Minhyuk is also the type who spluttered out nonsense.
“Shh…” Jieun hushed as her finger was placed on Minhyuk’s lips to shut him up. “You’re so noisy, oppa~ what if Zico hears you?”
Zico wasn’t sure whether he should be surprised or not. Does that meant Jieun really don’t want him anymore? All of a sudden the two of them were acting as if they were the couple. Minhyuk only let out a giggle as he slowly stuck out his tongue and licked her finger. Jieun giggled feeling the wetness of his tongue on her finger.
Zico was so astonished by the sudden scene, his eyes were wide as saucers and he immediately screamed as he pulled Jieun’s wrist away from Minhyuk. Even though he had been screaming loudly, nobody seemed to give two fucks because they knew better than to interrupt  an angry Zico.
“Yah! What the fuck?!” Zico screamed. “She’s my fucking girlfriend, hyung! Now, let’s go, Jieun.”
Zico then motioned Jieun to stand up but she refused to. She whimpered as she shook her head. With so much force, she pulled her wrist away from Zico’s grasp and turned to hug Minhyuk tightly, not wanting to let him go.
“Don’t wanna,” she pouted.
“Aw, Jieunnie,” Minhyuk cooed as he stroke her hair. “She doesn’t want to, Jiho-ya~”
“Don’t want Jiho. He’s a bad bad bad bad guy,” Jieun pouted as she looked up to Minhyuk with puppy eyes.
Zico felt that the whole situation was absurd. “I think you guys have drunk too much alcohol. Now, Jieun-ah,” he kindly said in a gentle tone, in hope that Jieun would turn to him. “Let’s go, I’ll take you home.”
“Don’t wanna,” she pouted again as she glared at Zico. “I wanna stay with oppa.”
Minhyuk gave her a smile and spoke with slurred words, “You’re so cute. I’ll let you blow me.” Jieun looked up to him and nodded eagerly, as if what they were saying were not wrong at all.
Zico’s jaw dropped.
“What the fuck?!” Zico screamed. He couldn’t stand watching his own girlfriend, eagerly wanting to suck his hyung’s dick off. Using all his strength, he pulled Jieun away by her wrist, causing her to yelp in pain. Minhyuk let out a groan.
Without turning back, Zico dragged Jieun to the car. Jieun refused to enter at first but with much difficulty, Zico managed to carry her inside of the car and immediately went to the driver seat and drive.
“Wae wae wae wae wae WAE?” Jieun screamed cutely as she brought her legs up to the chair and hugged her knees. “I promised to blow Minhyuk oppa now I broke my promise and it’s all because of you! You’re a bad boy! Jieun hates bad boys!”
“Yah! What the fuck are you talking about? I’m your fucking boyfriend and we’ve never even had sex and you’ve promised to suck my hyung’s dick? Yah, what the fuck is wrong with you?!” Zico yelled although his gaze was focused on the road.
“You’re not my boyfriend!”
“Am too!”
“I don’t wanna be your girlfriend!” she screamed. “I really don’t wanna!! I hate you! I hate you so much!”
“Yah! Stop screaming!” Zico screamed back.
“NO I DON’T WANT TO! I DON’T WANNA BE YOUR GIRLFRIEND! YOU HATE ME!! I HATE YOU!! You love her… not me…” her voice turned into whisper as she buried her face on her knees and began to sob. “I like you so so so so so much but you hate me… I don’t wanna be your girlfriend… it hurts…”
Zico slowed down, he almost pressed the brake. He was speechless. There were no words left for him to say.
“You hate me…”
“I don’t,” he answered, his voice was softer this time.
“You like Eunju unnie, you hate me, you liar. You lied to me. You use me for Eunju unnie. You never love me. I love you…” she sobbed again.
“I never use you,” he replied. He refused to look at Jieun, he felt embarrassed all of a sudden. “I like you - no scratch that, I love you. More than I intended to.”
She didn’t reply, she only continued to sob. Her cries echoed in Zico’s ears, making him feel guilty than ever. “I don’t wanna be your girlfriend…. I don’t wanna be your girlfriend….” she muttered, loud enough for Zico to hear.
I’m sorry.

Jieun woke up the next day, and noticed that it was afternoon. She began to sit up but fall back to the bed as she could feel a throbbing pain on her head. She groaned as she remembered being drunk but she didn’t even remember what happened and how she got back home. She turned around to see that she was perfectly in her room.
Coincidentally, Eunju barged into the room with a soup. “Oh, you’re awake,” she gasped in surprise as she walked to Jieun and sat on her bed, placing the bowl of soup on the side table.
“What happened?” she asked as she tried her best to sit up. With Eunju’s help, she managed to sit up with the headboard supporting her body.
“Zico sent you home,” Eunju answered.
“Really?” she had no memory of Zico sending her home.
“Yeah, he asked you to check your phone as soon as you wake up,” Eunju continued. “Oh, here’s a hangover soup for you. If you need me, I’ll be in the living room, get some rest, will you?” with that, Eunju left her alone in her room.
Jieun checked on her hoodie’s pocket and found out that her phone was still there. Confused, she turned on her phone and found that there were a lot of miscalls and messages from yesterday. She opened it and saw a message from Zico, the latest one. Without thinking much, she opened the message and read it.

From: Jiho ♡♡

I understand that you want a break up.
Sorry. Sorry for being a bad boyfriend.
bye.

“What the -” Jieun muttered. “When did I want a break up?”
Then all the memories came crashing back.
“Oh fuck,” she muttered. “I did want a break up.”