Musing of the mind for now
My uncle took another wife. Surprising. Very surprising. Okay lah, Islamically he can do that. It's his rights as a husband. To take on a subsequent wife, provided that he doesn't marry more than 4 wives. I never thought that he will do that. When he came to my house, I was a bit surprised. I thought my aunt changed her style or something but then, it was someone different. She looked like my aunt but she's not her. Seriously, I don't know what happened to her. Is she still married to him or they divorce or what about Pika, my cousin aka their daughter? Those questions are basically playing in my head right now because my siblings and I are very close to her. We tend to spend the Eid talking and reading Archie comics with each other. The new wife seems nice and I'm okay with her. Marrying my uncle doesn't give a reason for me to hate her, it gives me a reason to doubt people, especially men.
I'm okay with polygamy per se. I understand the mechanism, the objective and the rules. It supposed to benefit women. Husbands must be fair in polygamous marriage, not only to their wives but also to their children.
But, I don't know. It's a wonder how during the Prophet's (peace be upon him) time polygamy was so welcoming and practiced correctly. But now, I don't know. From what I read in the papers, it only leads to broken families. But, that paper falls under the rubbish category so I'm just going to take it with a grain of salt. I have yet to find a case of successful polygamous marriage so please, anybody out there find one, please let me know pronto.
What am I trying to say is that, I wonder how my aunt and Pika would feel. Will they feel angry, betrayed, okay, grudgingly accepting, I don't know. I just hope that this doesn't break the family apart.
In my honest opinion, if polygamy is to happen to my family. I'm not sure how I would react. Of course, I would be shocked and feel that it will be a slap on the face. I'm not sure that I would accept it. Actually, it already happened in my family, starting from my paternal grandfather, my grand uncle and my uncle(s). I don't know why I was so accepting towards my grandfather's and my grand uncle's polygamous marriages, maybe it's because it already happened before I was born. I don't know. Maybe, this thing takes time for me to adjust. It is a type of relationship and relationship takes time to adjust.
No, I'm not opposing polygamy, it's just that this has been in my head for as long as I can remember. I know that it's halal but I'm practically okay if people oppose it because it's their personal opinion. It doesn't mean that they want to propose to make polygamy illegal or anything. Basically, it's like this: as long as it's halal, do it. Don't like it, don't do it. And, try not to piss people off.
I'm okay with polygamy per se. I understand the mechanism, the objective and the rules. It supposed to benefit women. Husbands must be fair in polygamous marriage, not only to their wives but also to their children.
But, I don't know. It's a wonder how during the Prophet's (peace be upon him) time polygamy was so welcoming and practiced correctly. But now, I don't know. From what I read in the papers, it only leads to broken families. But, that paper falls under the rubbish category so I'm just going to take it with a grain of salt. I have yet to find a case of successful polygamous marriage so please, anybody out there find one, please let me know pronto.
What am I trying to say is that, I wonder how my aunt and Pika would feel. Will they feel angry, betrayed, okay, grudgingly accepting, I don't know. I just hope that this doesn't break the family apart.
In my honest opinion, if polygamy is to happen to my family. I'm not sure how I would react. Of course, I would be shocked and feel that it will be a slap on the face. I'm not sure that I would accept it. Actually, it already happened in my family, starting from my paternal grandfather, my grand uncle and my uncle(s). I don't know why I was so accepting towards my grandfather's and my grand uncle's polygamous marriages, maybe it's because it already happened before I was born. I don't know. Maybe, this thing takes time for me to adjust. It is a type of relationship and relationship takes time to adjust.
No, I'm not opposing polygamy, it's just that this has been in my head for as long as I can remember. I know that it's halal but I'm practically okay if people oppose it because it's their personal opinion. It doesn't mean that they want to propose to make polygamy illegal or anything. Basically, it's like this: as long as it's halal, do it. Don't like it, don't do it. And, try not to piss people off.