Something
Something in the way she moves
attracts me like no other lover...
Don't ask me why, but it applies. It's late and I need to sleep. Seriously. But I am scared that I may've fucked up the one things I never wanted to.
I don't know how, but Michael and I got to talking about love and we came up with a brilliant analogy for it: it should, ideally, be more of mutual acceptance between two people, which would make it more like a divine love where love extends both ways. It is much more complicated than that. And being the fool that I am, my heart began to pound and ache in my chest with the heaviness of feelings. Feelings...I do not know just what they are. It is this strange mix of fear, adoration, dread, and thrill. I couldn't hide it. I had to say something. I wanted to say the three little words, but I knew that once I said them I could never take them back. But if I don't say something...who's to say? What is the something in my heart? What is it that writhed in me today as I spoke words of Shakespeare and watched as others acted out scenes of spoken love?
I kept thinking to myself that if I say it, I'll lose him somehow. But if I say nothing, it would be like walking away from it. And if I walk away from this, from him, from this pure acceptance of him and his appearance of acceptance of me...will I ever forgive myself?
DM: I feel something for you. I don't know what it is but it's strong. I don't want to label it now and say something imbecilic and have it change over time. I don't what it is, but I feel something for you. I don't know how to tell you what it is.
Michael: I definitely feel something for you, too.
DM: Really?
Michael: And I don't know just what it is, either. But it's something.
And we both went quiet and he stayed thinking. I could finally breathe and the tears waiting to fall fell back to their sources and I fell back into his arms. He told me he had hit an emotional wall and wasn't sure what to do with it. He's was also sad to learn he had the quintessential male emotional wall.
But there's something. And something's better than nothing.
"You're asking me 'Will my love grow?'
I don't know, I don't know
You stick around now, it may show
I don't know, I don't know..."
I don't know if this will make things awkward or not, but it seems that we're still on the same page. We feel something. The nature of this something hasn't yet manifested itself. For me, it feels like love. Love. I don't know the dangers of saying that, but the more I tell myself otherwise the more I feel that that's what this is. For me. Maybe I'm not alone this time.
attracts me like no other lover...
Don't ask me why, but it applies. It's late and I need to sleep. Seriously. But I am scared that I may've fucked up the one things I never wanted to.
I don't know how, but Michael and I got to talking about love and we came up with a brilliant analogy for it: it should, ideally, be more of mutual acceptance between two people, which would make it more like a divine love where love extends both ways. It is much more complicated than that. And being the fool that I am, my heart began to pound and ache in my chest with the heaviness of feelings. Feelings...I do not know just what they are. It is this strange mix of fear, adoration, dread, and thrill. I couldn't hide it. I had to say something. I wanted to say the three little words, but I knew that once I said them I could never take them back. But if I don't say something...who's to say? What is the something in my heart? What is it that writhed in me today as I spoke words of Shakespeare and watched as others acted out scenes of spoken love?
I kept thinking to myself that if I say it, I'll lose him somehow. But if I say nothing, it would be like walking away from it. And if I walk away from this, from him, from this pure acceptance of him and his appearance of acceptance of me...will I ever forgive myself?
DM: I feel something for you. I don't know what it is but it's strong. I don't want to label it now and say something imbecilic and have it change over time. I don't what it is, but I feel something for you. I don't know how to tell you what it is.
Michael: I definitely feel something for you, too.
DM: Really?
Michael: And I don't know just what it is, either. But it's something.
And we both went quiet and he stayed thinking. I could finally breathe and the tears waiting to fall fell back to their sources and I fell back into his arms. He told me he had hit an emotional wall and wasn't sure what to do with it. He's was also sad to learn he had the quintessential male emotional wall.
But there's something. And something's better than nothing.
"You're asking me 'Will my love grow?'
I don't know, I don't know
You stick around now, it may show
I don't know, I don't know..."
I don't know if this will make things awkward or not, but it seems that we're still on the same page. We feel something. The nature of this something hasn't yet manifested itself. For me, it feels like love. Love. I don't know the dangers of saying that, but the more I tell myself otherwise the more I feel that that's what this is. For me. Maybe I'm not alone this time.