[Super Junior] Seven Years of Love, PG, Romance, QMi
Happy 4th anniversary, SJ. (It's the 6th in Korea - that counts, right?) Thank you for keeping me entertained and more-or-less sane for two years and counting. ♥
This can stand alone but it's really meant to be part of a larger story (which may or may not get written, one day). For now, have this, with love.
Seven Years of Love
Super Junior (M), Kyuhyun/Zhou Mi, PG, 1115 words
It had been seven years, and Kyuhyun was doing his best not to remember.
When it came to Super Junior, there were four dates that Kyuhyun would always remember:
November 6. The day of Super Junior's debut and anniversary. Even though he hadn't been there for the former, he had been there for the latter every year since. It never failed to make some unnameable emotion rise in his chest, something like gratitude and relief, something like love, or joy, looking back at every trial they'd ever faced, together.
May 23. The day Kyuhyun was added to the group. It hadn't been so very momentous, only another nondescript day in May when the news was officially broadcast. Kyuhyun only remembered out of sentimentality. Still, Donghae texted him or called him every year on that day - sometimes he would say, "I'm glad you're with us" and other times he wouldn't mention it at all, but he would always remember Kyuhyun.
August 17. The day Super Junior hosted their final goodbye stage, in tears and holding onto each other as if they could delay the inevitable. The roar of the fans who had loved them and held them together all those years drowned out their music, lifting them up one last time.
And the last day carved into Kyuhyun's memory was the day Zhou Mi went solo. February 28. Super Junior M was no more: he was free to do as he pleased - to sing, to MC, to make a name for himself in the Chinese music industry with his voice and his smile.
The day Zhou Mi's debut album was released, Kyuhyun was in the midst of promoting his own solo album. He didn't even remember, now, his own release date (it had been in October, because he remembered looking out the car windows at red and gold leaves the first time his song played on the radio), but he when he bought Zhou Mi's CD, he remembered thinking I haven't heard him sing for a year. He ignored the world for that hour, earphones tucked in as he tuned out everything but the sound of that achingly familiar voice, singing about love and loss, happiness and heartbreak, in a language Kyuhyun missed deep in his bones. (Missed the way it flowed off Zhou Mi's tongue, liquid and natural. Missed the way it resonated inside him, different from Korean but still comforting.)
Kyuhyun wondered if Zhou Mi had written any of the lyrics.
He flipped through the album jacket to discover that Zhou Mi had not only contributed lyrics to half the album, but had personally composed the fourth track. 无法放弃 (Can't Let Go).
It was, he thought then, ironic. Kyuhyun remembered a time when irony used to amuse him. He felt that he had been young then.
Zhou Mi had stayed in Korea only two months after Super Junior disbanded. He'd made arrangements with the upper management in SM, reconstructing clauses of his contract, and then he had left for China before Kyuhyun had even finished recording the first track to his solo album.
He'd been kept busy in the studio for the next half a year, seeing only Jongwoon and Ryeowook and Jungsu on a regular basis. He still saw Youngwoon and Heechul on television and heard Hyukjae on the radio often, hosting his own show. He got the occasional call from Sungmin and had met up with Donghae and Shindong for drinks once. Han Geng and Siwon were in China again, filming the movie they'd always wanted to film together. Everyone was busy doing their own thing.
Zhou Mi had emailed him once with an update on his album and wishing Kyuhyun luck with his; he'd sounded happy but tired, and had ended the email on a rushed note, signing with a simple "觅".
Kyuhyun had been angry. He had spent the three hours he was out with Ryeowook that night lashing out at Zhou Mi.
Ryeowook had emptied the soju bottle and looked at Kyuhyun with sad, sympathetic eyes. "You miss him," he'd said simply.
And as Kyuhyun had tossed back his soju, feeling it burn down his throat, a part of him conceded that Ryeowook was right. He tended to always be right. That hadn't changed, after all these years.
Two weeks after that email, Kyuhyun had called Zhou Mi.
"Hi, Kyuhyun, how are you?" Zhou Mi had greeted him, and he had sounded cheerful enough, but his words had stirred a pang in Kyuhyun's heart. How long had it been since Zhou Mi had called him "Kui Xian"? How long had he been waiting to hear it again?
He took a breath and exhaled it slowly, but the tension remained in him. "I'm okay. How are you doing?"
He feigned interest in small talk for another five minutes before he couldn't take it anymore. "Did you seriously have your manager call mine about doing a duet?" he snapped abruptly, cutting Zhou Mi off in the middle of a spiel about how he'd almost lost the only demo to one of the songs after a mishap with a clumsy intern and a bout of bad Beijing weather.
Zhou Mi stopped short. "Oh," he said softly. "Oh yes. Kyuhyun, would you want to? I've always wanted to... I was hoping we could do one in Chinese, if you were interested."
It wasn't as if he weren't interested. It wasn't that. Kyuhyun would sing with Zhou Mi forever if given a chance, but there was something black and ugly eating him up from inside, bitter on his tongue. "You couldn't even ask me personally? The first I hear about it is from my manager?" The words were angry and brittle and in his mind he could see Zhou Mi physically recoiling from the force of them. He remembered what that face looked like happy, angry, hurt, bewildered... It had been seven years and he still couldn't forget. Seven years after he'd first met Zhou Mi and it still wasn't long enough.
They didn't end up recording a duet for Zhou Mi's solo album. Liyin had been featured in two songs, though; Victoria and Amber contributed to another song, and Hyukjae had rapped in the one Korean track Zhou Mi had included.
Kyuhyun didn't hear the album until he bought it in stores the day it was officially released, a date that would be etched forever in his mind with the three other dates he would never forget. He listened to Zhou Mi's voice loop in his mind, drowning in irony. Can't forget your smiling face. Can't forget these memories of yesterday. After all this time, I still can't let go.
The weight of seven years of love stayed with him: a constant, silent companion.
--
Started/Finished: 2009.10.20
Edited: 2009.11.05
Notes: I would have written an SJ bandfic if I'd had the time but I've been swamped with RL and NaNoWriMo lately so I put up this piece. Also, I love this song so much.
This can stand alone but it's really meant to be part of a larger story (which may or may not get written, one day). For now, have this, with love.
Seven Years of Love
Super Junior (M), Kyuhyun/Zhou Mi, PG, 1115 words
It had been seven years, and Kyuhyun was doing his best not to remember.
When it came to Super Junior, there were four dates that Kyuhyun would always remember:
November 6. The day of Super Junior's debut and anniversary. Even though he hadn't been there for the former, he had been there for the latter every year since. It never failed to make some unnameable emotion rise in his chest, something like gratitude and relief, something like love, or joy, looking back at every trial they'd ever faced, together.
May 23. The day Kyuhyun was added to the group. It hadn't been so very momentous, only another nondescript day in May when the news was officially broadcast. Kyuhyun only remembered out of sentimentality. Still, Donghae texted him or called him every year on that day - sometimes he would say, "I'm glad you're with us" and other times he wouldn't mention it at all, but he would always remember Kyuhyun.
August 17. The day Super Junior hosted their final goodbye stage, in tears and holding onto each other as if they could delay the inevitable. The roar of the fans who had loved them and held them together all those years drowned out their music, lifting them up one last time.
And the last day carved into Kyuhyun's memory was the day Zhou Mi went solo. February 28. Super Junior M was no more: he was free to do as he pleased - to sing, to MC, to make a name for himself in the Chinese music industry with his voice and his smile.
The day Zhou Mi's debut album was released, Kyuhyun was in the midst of promoting his own solo album. He didn't even remember, now, his own release date (it had been in October, because he remembered looking out the car windows at red and gold leaves the first time his song played on the radio), but he when he bought Zhou Mi's CD, he remembered thinking I haven't heard him sing for a year. He ignored the world for that hour, earphones tucked in as he tuned out everything but the sound of that achingly familiar voice, singing about love and loss, happiness and heartbreak, in a language Kyuhyun missed deep in his bones. (Missed the way it flowed off Zhou Mi's tongue, liquid and natural. Missed the way it resonated inside him, different from Korean but still comforting.)
Kyuhyun wondered if Zhou Mi had written any of the lyrics.
He flipped through the album jacket to discover that Zhou Mi had not only contributed lyrics to half the album, but had personally composed the fourth track. 无法放弃 (Can't Let Go).
It was, he thought then, ironic. Kyuhyun remembered a time when irony used to amuse him. He felt that he had been young then.
Zhou Mi had stayed in Korea only two months after Super Junior disbanded. He'd made arrangements with the upper management in SM, reconstructing clauses of his contract, and then he had left for China before Kyuhyun had even finished recording the first track to his solo album.
He'd been kept busy in the studio for the next half a year, seeing only Jongwoon and Ryeowook and Jungsu on a regular basis. He still saw Youngwoon and Heechul on television and heard Hyukjae on the radio often, hosting his own show. He got the occasional call from Sungmin and had met up with Donghae and Shindong for drinks once. Han Geng and Siwon were in China again, filming the movie they'd always wanted to film together. Everyone was busy doing their own thing.
Zhou Mi had emailed him once with an update on his album and wishing Kyuhyun luck with his; he'd sounded happy but tired, and had ended the email on a rushed note, signing with a simple "觅".
Kyuhyun had been angry. He had spent the three hours he was out with Ryeowook that night lashing out at Zhou Mi.
Ryeowook had emptied the soju bottle and looked at Kyuhyun with sad, sympathetic eyes. "You miss him," he'd said simply.
And as Kyuhyun had tossed back his soju, feeling it burn down his throat, a part of him conceded that Ryeowook was right. He tended to always be right. That hadn't changed, after all these years.
Two weeks after that email, Kyuhyun had called Zhou Mi.
"Hi, Kyuhyun, how are you?" Zhou Mi had greeted him, and he had sounded cheerful enough, but his words had stirred a pang in Kyuhyun's heart. How long had it been since Zhou Mi had called him "Kui Xian"? How long had he been waiting to hear it again?
He took a breath and exhaled it slowly, but the tension remained in him. "I'm okay. How are you doing?"
He feigned interest in small talk for another five minutes before he couldn't take it anymore. "Did you seriously have your manager call mine about doing a duet?" he snapped abruptly, cutting Zhou Mi off in the middle of a spiel about how he'd almost lost the only demo to one of the songs after a mishap with a clumsy intern and a bout of bad Beijing weather.
Zhou Mi stopped short. "Oh," he said softly. "Oh yes. Kyuhyun, would you want to? I've always wanted to... I was hoping we could do one in Chinese, if you were interested."
It wasn't as if he weren't interested. It wasn't that. Kyuhyun would sing with Zhou Mi forever if given a chance, but there was something black and ugly eating him up from inside, bitter on his tongue. "You couldn't even ask me personally? The first I hear about it is from my manager?" The words were angry and brittle and in his mind he could see Zhou Mi physically recoiling from the force of them. He remembered what that face looked like happy, angry, hurt, bewildered... It had been seven years and he still couldn't forget. Seven years after he'd first met Zhou Mi and it still wasn't long enough.
They didn't end up recording a duet for Zhou Mi's solo album. Liyin had been featured in two songs, though; Victoria and Amber contributed to another song, and Hyukjae had rapped in the one Korean track Zhou Mi had included.
Kyuhyun didn't hear the album until he bought it in stores the day it was officially released, a date that would be etched forever in his mind with the three other dates he would never forget. He listened to Zhou Mi's voice loop in his mind, drowning in irony. Can't forget your smiling face. Can't forget these memories of yesterday. After all this time, I still can't let go.
The weight of seven years of love stayed with him: a constant, silent companion.
--
Started/Finished: 2009.10.20
Edited: 2009.11.05
Notes: I would have written an SJ bandfic if I'd had the time but I've been swamped with RL and NaNoWriMo lately so I put up this piece. Also, I love this song so much.