(no subject)
so aquire the fire was this weekend.....it seemed to do the opposite of what i thought it'd do... it made me see all the stuff in me that's bad and rather than trying to change it i now hate myself even more 1) my follower personality 2)i'm a fake 3)my heart is rock hard to preacher's..... then i got home last night and was screamed at by my family because they thought i was missing when i told them aqire the fire was 2 days, so they pretty much called me stupid the whole night, they also found myspace and when they see my grades next week i'm in deeper trouble, i asked god last night to help me see what he wants me to do... i'm sick of living not trusting anyone or even myself...it feels like satan is inside of me and to get him out i have to cut through a lot of nerves and skin to get better..... i always come back to this feeling that i should take guitar lessons not because it'd be a nice hobby or make me a beter guitar player, but it seems like that's how god wants to use me... it seems like my best friends lately are Heather, Dave, Alex, brandon, lindsay, Genelle (cant spell) Chels and Ross thanks for all the support this weekend please pray for me