[SR] Philip Roth quote
[Set about three years ago. Grace = heirtothe_chief, everyone else is an NPC.]
“No matter how much you know, no matter how much you think, no matter how much you plot and you connive and you plan, you're not superior to sex. It's a very risky game. A man wouldn't have two-thirds of the problems he has if he didn't venture off to get fucked.”
She didn’t say anything.
She was tired of saying something. Tired of thinking that he was actually listening, and tired of pretending that she didn’t care. She was tired of pretending to be okay with the way things were, and what this man-this man who she thought loved her-expected her to be able to just swallow this and deal with it. She couldn’t. She couldn’t just accept that he was always going to want other women more than he wanted her. That their marriage was looking to be one of convenience as oppose to love. That he wanted her family’s status more than he wanted an actual relationship with her.
She couldn’t be her mother. She didn’t want to be her mother.
He and the current bimbo were frozen, staring at her, and she just looked right back. She could see the wheels in his head turning, trying to find an explanation for their current predicament but she didn’t speak until her masochism reached its limit and she had to look away or she was going to fall apart, and she wasn’t going to give him the satisfaction.
“Felicity-”
“Don’t,” she said softly, pulling the engagement ring off her finger and placing it down on the dresser next to her. In hindsight, she probably should have held on to it and hocked it, but at the moment she didn’t need the reminder. She just shook her head as she turned away and headed towards the door. “Just don’t.”
The hotel didn’t have carpet in the hallways. She wasn’t really paying particularly close attention, but she did find it a little odd that she could hear her heels clicking against the marble floor as she made her way back to her family’s suite. The wedding was a week away, and she should probably inform them that it wasn’t going to happen. It was the courteous thing to do, after all. She was feeling a little out of it, and it probably had good reason to be, but if she could just hold it together till she was alone, that would be fantastic.
She knocked lightly on the master door to the suite, and it was a minute before Grace answered. She only had to look at her sister for a minute, before Grace was pulling the door open wider and pulling her in. “What happened?”
Felicity was quiet for a minute, meeting the other sets of eyes in the room. Everyone in one place-this should be easy enough. She felt all of them on her, and it made her just want to curl up in a ball away from everything else, and she swallowed, pushing it away and straightening her shoulders. Five minutes. Five minutes and she could go and hide in her sister’s room and pretend the rest of the world didn’t exist.
“The wedding’s off,” she said with a nod. “Just thought I’d let you know.”
Her father seemed angry by the decision, but everyone else was pretty much in shock. Daniel Braddock was on his feet in a half a second, looking at his daughter with suspicious eyes. “Please tell me you at least have a reason, Felicity, and you’re not throwing away a perfectly good match a week before the wedding.”
Felicity looked at him coldly for a moment, before her eyes drifted in the direction of her mother with a bit of a sigh. “I can’t be you.”
Alicia’s eyes closed slightly in understanding, but Daniel didn’t find that sufficient in the slightest. “And that’s an explanation?” Her father wasn’t pleased, but she didn’t care. She had said her piece, given her reason, and now she just wanted to be alone. She turned her back on them, heading towards the bedroom her sister was staying in and listening to the roar of her father’s voice behind her. “Felicity, this conversation is not finished-”
“Daniel, let her go,” Alicia said firmly, in the tone that meant her husband better listen to her. Felicity, however, didn’t stop and continued moving in the direction of her sister’s room, not stopping until she was sure she was out of view, just letting her shoulders hunch and her body slowly collapse in on herself.
A few minutes later, she heard the door close behind her, and felt a pair of hands on her shoulders. “Oh, Lissie,” Grace said gently as she pulled her sister into a hug. “I’m so sorry.” Felicity curled her hands around her sister’s shoulders and leaned in closer, before burying her face against her chest. She was tired of being controlled and together, but after that was done, all there really was left to do was cry.
785 words
“No matter how much you know, no matter how much you think, no matter how much you plot and you connive and you plan, you're not superior to sex. It's a very risky game. A man wouldn't have two-thirds of the problems he has if he didn't venture off to get fucked.”
She didn’t say anything.
She was tired of saying something. Tired of thinking that he was actually listening, and tired of pretending that she didn’t care. She was tired of pretending to be okay with the way things were, and what this man-this man who she thought loved her-expected her to be able to just swallow this and deal with it. She couldn’t. She couldn’t just accept that he was always going to want other women more than he wanted her. That their marriage was looking to be one of convenience as oppose to love. That he wanted her family’s status more than he wanted an actual relationship with her.
She couldn’t be her mother. She didn’t want to be her mother.
He and the current bimbo were frozen, staring at her, and she just looked right back. She could see the wheels in his head turning, trying to find an explanation for their current predicament but she didn’t speak until her masochism reached its limit and she had to look away or she was going to fall apart, and she wasn’t going to give him the satisfaction.
“Felicity-”
“Don’t,” she said softly, pulling the engagement ring off her finger and placing it down on the dresser next to her. In hindsight, she probably should have held on to it and hocked it, but at the moment she didn’t need the reminder. She just shook her head as she turned away and headed towards the door. “Just don’t.”
The hotel didn’t have carpet in the hallways. She wasn’t really paying particularly close attention, but she did find it a little odd that she could hear her heels clicking against the marble floor as she made her way back to her family’s suite. The wedding was a week away, and she should probably inform them that it wasn’t going to happen. It was the courteous thing to do, after all. She was feeling a little out of it, and it probably had good reason to be, but if she could just hold it together till she was alone, that would be fantastic.
She knocked lightly on the master door to the suite, and it was a minute before Grace answered. She only had to look at her sister for a minute, before Grace was pulling the door open wider and pulling her in. “What happened?”
Felicity was quiet for a minute, meeting the other sets of eyes in the room. Everyone in one place-this should be easy enough. She felt all of them on her, and it made her just want to curl up in a ball away from everything else, and she swallowed, pushing it away and straightening her shoulders. Five minutes. Five minutes and she could go and hide in her sister’s room and pretend the rest of the world didn’t exist.
“The wedding’s off,” she said with a nod. “Just thought I’d let you know.”
Her father seemed angry by the decision, but everyone else was pretty much in shock. Daniel Braddock was on his feet in a half a second, looking at his daughter with suspicious eyes. “Please tell me you at least have a reason, Felicity, and you’re not throwing away a perfectly good match a week before the wedding.”
Felicity looked at him coldly for a moment, before her eyes drifted in the direction of her mother with a bit of a sigh. “I can’t be you.”
Alicia’s eyes closed slightly in understanding, but Daniel didn’t find that sufficient in the slightest. “And that’s an explanation?” Her father wasn’t pleased, but she didn’t care. She had said her piece, given her reason, and now she just wanted to be alone. She turned her back on them, heading towards the bedroom her sister was staying in and listening to the roar of her father’s voice behind her. “Felicity, this conversation is not finished-”
“Daniel, let her go,” Alicia said firmly, in the tone that meant her husband better listen to her. Felicity, however, didn’t stop and continued moving in the direction of her sister’s room, not stopping until she was sure she was out of view, just letting her shoulders hunch and her body slowly collapse in on herself.
A few minutes later, she heard the door close behind her, and felt a pair of hands on her shoulders. “Oh, Lissie,” Grace said gently as she pulled her sister into a hug. “I’m so sorry.” Felicity curled her hands around her sister’s shoulders and leaned in closer, before burying her face against her chest. She was tired of being controlled and together, but after that was done, all there really was left to do was cry.
785 words