[fanfic] Broken Inside
Title: Broken Inside
Author: jhengchie
Pairing: Broken! Yewook, KyuWook
Genre: AU, romance, angst
Rating: PG-13
Summary: I smile as I let you go, I cry as I watch you go.
Song Prompt: Janus by Boyfriend
a/n: Inspired by Boyfriend's Janus Song lyrics and MV ^^ >>> It is really beautiful and meaningful!
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A placid smile was plastered on Jongwoon's face as he faces Ryeowook in a pre-arranged place. He steps forward to give the friend a hug.
"How have you been hyung?"
Ryeowook asked as they took a seat on one one of the reserved seats inside Mouse Rabbit Cafe.
"I'm quite fine. How's the planning going?"
Jongwoon asked which made the younger smile.
"It's doing pretty well! I'm quite happy that Kyu has been hands on with it, he's been really participating since day 1"
Ryeowook gleefully replied which made Jongwoon smile wider.
"i'm very happy for you Ryeowook, it seems that you've found your soulmate."
Jongwoon softly muttered and Ryeowook's smile faded and her eyes started to well up.
"Hyung, mianhe"
Ryeowook softly replied, not looking at the dark orbs that belonged to Jongwoon.
"Why are you apologizing Ryeowook?!"
Jongwoon said as he held Ryeowook's hand and gently squeezed it, making Ryeowook look at the older, his tears quietly spilling from his eyes. Jongwoon took his free hand and wiped the tears from Ryeowook's face.
"It's not your fault Ryeowook.. Just remember that. You're not a bad kid!"
Jongwoon muttered and Ryeowook embraced the older, crying on his shoulders as he continued to apologize.
"Hyung Mianhe!"
Ryeowook muttered and Jongwoon let out a sigh as he embraced the younger tightly.
"Just promise me you'll stay happy."
Jongwoon said and he felt Ryeowook nod.
"I'll be OK. Live your life as you want it.. Live your future as you see it. I'll be happy for you and Kyuhyun"
Jongwoon said and broke the embrace. He cupped Ryeowook's cheeks and smiled before kissing him on his forehead.
"Smile for me Ryeowook and I'll smile for you like I always do. Don't let your guilt consume you.. don't feel as if you intended to hurt me.. I want you to remember me with a smile. I will remember you as the seet saeng that i'll always love."
Jongwoon muttered which made Ryeowook smile shyly.
"Hyung, Promise me you'll be there for me on my special day."
Ryeowook said and Jongwoon smiled and nodded. With that Ryeowook stood and took something from his bag and left it on the table. He then bowed before leaving the cafe without turning back.
Jongwoon sighed as he watch the retreating back of RYeowook. When he was all alone, he clenched his 2 fists and banged the table in front of him. He stared at the invite on the table and screamed as loud as he could. Tears started to pour and his dark eyes were drowned by it. He held it back when he was face to face with the person he most cherished but now that he is all alone, he let it all out: He was not OK.
...
Came the day of the wedding and Jongwoon stood by the altar next to Kyuhyun.
"Hyung, I'm so thankful! you have given me the love of my life!"
Jongwoon gave him a pat on the back and a smile.
"Just promise me that you'll love him"
Jongwoon said and Kyuhyun nodded. Their conversation was cut short when a song started to play and out came Ryeowook in white tuxedo complimenting Kyuhyun's. Ryeowook walked slowly, in time with the beat of the song. He was blushing as everyone focused their eyes on the blushing young man. And there Jongwoon was, standing as the bestman, hiding the pain in his chest for losing his most beloved.
As the two kissed to seal their fate, the wedding hall was filled with cheers and applause. The couple bowed and thanked everyone, most especially Jongwoon. As respect to the couple, he too bowed at them.
The party was doing great, everyone was having a great time and Jongwoon was faking his smile. He wanted to be remembered with a smile on his face.
"Chukahaeyo Kyu and Wookie."
Jongwoon congratulated the couple and extended to shake their hands but Ryeowook embraced the older and cried.
"Hyung.."
Ryeowook started but Jongwoon cut him off.
"this is your wedding so be happy. Smile Ryeowook"
Jongwoon muttered and the younger smiled through the tears.
"Kamsa Hyung... what will I do without you!"
Ryeowook muttered and earned a smile from both Jongwoon and Kyuhyun.
"I'll excuse myself, I need to rest for a while."
Jongwoon said and bowed at the couple before leaving the hall and going to his hotel room. He went to the bathroom, locked the door and faced the mirror, his reflection was not a pretty sight. He was dashing in white for the wedding but his reflection was draped in black, a gloomy aura surrounded him.
"Jongwoon pabo!"
he can hear his reflection shouting at him.
"Who are you to tell me!"
Jongwoon replied, maybe he had lost his mind.
" I am the reflection of what you feel inside.. broken and tormented.. I am Yesung"
Jongwoon clenched his fist, grabbing his pounding chest. he dropped to his knees and started to cry. He let out a pitiful scream and cried.
"How pitiful you look! trying to be strong when you're clearly not! You unworthy creature!"
Yesung yelled at Jongwoon and the latter's head ached and succumbed to the weight of his heart. He closed his eyes as his whole body lie flat on the cold marble floor. His soul was ripped and his heart shattered. He was being sucked inside a blackhole of emptiness and he knew he won't be able to excape.
And he lied motionless on the cold floor. He was still alive but without a soul to drive his existence, what is Jongwoon but dead?
He slowly opened his eyes and looked around him. He lifted his face and pulled himself up to face the mirror; ntense black orbs stare at a pair of tearful eyes. He slowly smiled and laughed in a mocking tone.
"You will cease to exist Jongwoon. You pitiful creature!"
The person remarked and left the bathroom to grab his things and left. He walked past the wedding hall and the hotel front door to an awaiting car.
"You'll remember my smile Ryeowook, a smile you'll cease to see for eternity. Jongwoon is dead. He died when you said good bye. I am now Yesung.. and you won't be able to tear my soul apart with your smile or your apologies.. I am not the person you knew before."
Yesung muttered to himself as he drove away.
A/N: ok so again this was inspired by Boyfriend's Janus MV The lyrics were just so beautiful not to translate into a fanfic.
Anyway, I know it's a bit confusing but i Do hope you'll see through the story and understand it.
Comments are welcomed and loved!