A place in my heart Part 19 - epilogue: let’s end it in a happy note.
Title: A place in my heart
Pairing: Hanchul, Eunhae, Hyukchul, Hanhae [girl! Donghae and HEechul]
Other: kangteuk, henyewook, kyumimin, shindong x [sunny/nariya]
Genre: friendship, angst , fluff
Rating: PG-13
Type: Multi-chaptered
Summary: Heechul wants everything but couldn't get any since Donghae unknowingly had them.
Warning: Character death, violence
A/N: this is the end finally after almost a year~~ this series is done^^
---o0o---
Their graduation marked the end of their school life and the start of a life long career. For Donghae and Eunhyuk, life has been really good and blissful: after 6 years of being a couple, they decided to tie the knot and get married in a very intimate and romantic wedding by the beach with all their close friends and mentors, except for Heechul and Hangeng who the couple wanted to their maid of honor and best man. During the reception, the couple paid a tribute to Heechul as Eunhyuk narrated her story through a slideshow of Donghae’s paintings dedicated to Heechul. Did I say paintings dedicated to Heechul? Yes Donghae created a collection of paintings dedicated to this misunderstood soul and has been given countless awards and recognitions for her work; Heechul was right to say that Donghae is a talented person.
If there is one thing that Eunhyuk and Donghae does every year, it is to commemorate Heechul’s Death Anniversary: for 7 years they have been continuously visiting her grave and give her offerings she deserve: her favorite flowers, expensive wines and succulent fruits. They both offer prayers and Eunhyuk never fails to perform for her and Donghae would tell her every detail of her works and how the critics praised her paintings of her.
But this year was different, on the 8th year of Heechul’s passing, Eunhyuk and Donghae came but now she was pregnant and as both Eunhyuk and Donghae were excited to tell Heechul of the news, they were surprised to see offerings already set on her grave and incense lighted. They looked around to see if there were other visitors but that day no one was present lest them.
Though bewildered, Eunhyuk and Donghae continued with their offering and commemoration. When they were finished, 2 lovely kids, aged roughly around 7 approached them and asked.
“Nimen renshi women mama?”
The girl in ponytail and purple dress asked. Donghae and eunhyuk of course didn’t understand the girl for she spoke Chinese, moreover they were surprised that the girl looked a lot like Heechul, a very pretty girl indeed.
“ah mianhe.. Do you know our mom?”
“ahh.. yes, She’s a friend.”
Eunhyuk answered though they were unsure why is the girl saying or claiming that Heechul was their mom. And they looked at the boy beside her and they can’t help but see the resemblance of Hangeng.
“ah.. Eunhyuk.. Donghae!”
Someone shouted which made both Eunhyuk and Donghae turn around, it was in fact Hangeng waving at them with a wide smile and not to mention an expensive Dior suit. Turns out that Hangeng has been very popular in China as an all around performer and actor, that he was busy with schedules during EunHae’s wedding.
“oppa!!!”
Donghae wanted to run but yeah, with her bulging tummy she can’t. Hangeng gave her a long hug and Eunhyuk shook his hands.
“papa.. wo renshi nimen?”
The boy asked and Hangeng introduced both parties.
“These are my kids, Joshua and Casey. Nimen shi Eunhyuk he Donghae, wo de pengyou.”
Eunhyuk smiled and the kids chuckled as they see his gums, cute kids the two thought. Hangeng seemed very happy seeing his good friends after 8 long years, and now he’s even more happy to hear about Donghae’s pregnancy.
They settled for a restaurant not far from the cemetery and as the kids roamed around the resto’s large outdoor landscaping, Hangeng decided to tell them his story, 8 years worth of updates that Donghae and Eunhyuk longed for.
“where do I start? You both know how my life has been.. after graduation I debuted as a dancer then a singer then a model and now a n actor.. I’m learning directing now.. I would want to direct a production someday.. maybe ask Siwon and Kibum to play the lead role.. “
Hangeng paused for a while as he stares at the setting sun, bright yellow and vibrant orange filling the horizon.
“no one knew I had kids.. moreover who their mother was. I know both of you are curious and confused seeing my kids..”
“Yeah I was surprised oppa.. but why do Casey looked a lot like Heechul Unnie?”
Donghae asked and Hangeng placidly smile, he missed this sweet side of Donghae.
“Heechul is their mom..”
“impossible!”
Eunhyuk interjected and Hangeng sighs before taking a sip of the pineapple juice.
“you see, 8 years ago, before I left Korea, I visited Heechul’s grave. I was planning to apologize to her, for making her life miserable and unbearable.. and also to confess my love for her. I know it’s damn too late but I really felt that it was the right thing to do. As I wept in her grave, a couple who was visiting Heechul too asked what my dilemma was. Turns out that they were Heechul’s friends...”
-Flashback-
“neh, sir why are you crying in front of Heechul’s grave? Is she your friend?”
The girl asked and Hangeng stood and faced the couple.
“Yeah.. she’s a friend..”
“is there any matter? You seemed very sad…”
“I just.. I never told her how much she means to me.. I’m a little too late..”
“I’m Jessica, this is my husband Jay. Heechul is a dear saeng of ours.”
Jessica and Jay shook Hangeng’s hands.
“nice to meet you.. I’m Hangeng.”
“oh really? Heechul was talking about you all the time.. she really likes you”
“I know.. but I wasn’t able to notice that before.. never gave her back the love she’d given me.”
Jessica and Jay felt his pain and they wished they could do to help him.
“I wish I could have something to remind me of her.. something I could keep with me.. to keep her alive in my heart.”
“maybe we could do something for you..”
Jay muttered and both hangeng and Jessica looked at him with question marks evident on their faces.
Jessica and Jay is a couple who weren’t able to conceive a child despite being married for 2 years. Heechul volunteered to donate her egg cells which the couple could use for artificial insemination. But three months after Heechul donated her egg cells, Jessica found out that she was in fact pregnant.
“Heechul’s egg cells were preserved and with artificial insemination, you could have children with Heechul.. you can keep her alive not only in your memory but through your child.”
Jay explained and Jessica smiled as she added.
“you don’t need to look for a surrogate mother, I could bear the child. Heechul was very supportive of Me and Jay when we were trying our best to conceive.. and even willingly donated her egg cells for me to use. Now that she is the one in need of help.. I’m not thinking twice about it..”
-end of flashback-
“so Jessica became the surrogate mother and it turns out to be twins: Casey and Joshua were both born on Heechul’s birthday.. kinda feels like Heechul really wanted to have this kids as her living memoir and remembrance. I was working in China when I got news of Jessica’s labor and I flew back to Korea as fast as I could to welcome the twins and I cried seeing Casey’s resemble to Heechul. Though we were never together, I felt that she really wanted to have a family with me… till now I can still her presence and love for our little family.”
Donghae was tearful as Hangeng ends his story.
“oppa!!!”
Hangeng smiled as he handed a handkerchief.
“You never change Hae.. you’re still this fragile lotus..”
“I can’t help it oppa.. till now, Heechul unnie is taking care of all of us, wanting us to have the life that we deserve.. I just wished we could give her that life back then right Hyukkie?!?”
Donghae turned to face his husband but she found a vacant seat instead.
“eh.. where did hyukkie go?”
Hangeng smiles as he points out outside by the sunset where Eunhyuk was standing alone and facing the setting sun.
“why is he…”
---o0o----
“noona..”
“I told you to drop the noona”
Eunhyuk smiled his gummy smile then sighs heavily.
“you must love having a family of your own.. Casey’s very pretty like you!”
“of course.. we are very pretty!”
Both of them smiled as they face the sun.
“neh.. hyukjae.. I am happy for you, soon you’ll be welcoming your son.”
“a son?! How could you tell?”
“duh hyukjae.. do I have to explain?!?”
“stupid me. But Heechul.. don’t you think it’s better that you were able to spend time with your kids, hug them and play with them?”
Eunhyuk asked, his tone was gloomy and Heechul can see his eyes filling with tears.
“Hyukjae.. don’t blame yourself. It’s better this way. You see, now I know that I hold a place in Hangeng’s heart.. though I may not be physically there for my family, having a family is something to be happy about.”
Heechul smiled a genuine smile which Eunhyuk remembered during their first encounter, the incident that made him know the fragile princess.
“I just wish you could’ve been there for my wedding.. it could have been an epic reception if Lady Hee Hee performed!”
Both of them laughs and Heechul gave him her final smile as she waves good bye and slowly faded with the blowing of the wind and blinding light of the sunset.
“take care hyukjae.. for you, hae and your family! Tell Hangeng and my kids that I love them so much!”
“good bye..”
Just as she faded into the wind and light, Casey and Joshua run towards him and asked him.
“uncle hyuk, did you just talk to omma?”
Casey asked and he nodded.
“yeah, she told me that she loves you both and most especially your dad.”
“really?! Omma is really sweet!”
Joshua mutters.
“so let’s go eat our dinner now?”
Eunhyuk asked as he grabs the children by their hands and led them back to the restaurant.
“omma visits us in our dreams.. she would always tell us how much she loves us.”
“really?! “
---o0o---
Hangeng smiles as he points out outside by the sunset where Eunhyuk was standing alone and facing the setting sun.
“why is he…”
Hangeng pointed at the spot beside Eunhyuk and Donghae concentrated her vision on the said spot and after a while, she gasped as she sees a silhouette which she recognizes as Heechul.
“Heechul unnie?”
Hangeng nodded.
“she never left us.. I can say that she is living the life she deserves, though she’s not here physically, she will always live in our hearts as we remember her as Heechul, the girl who longed to be loved.”
And as Hangeng spoke the last words, a gentle breeze blew and a faint and inaudible Saranghae was heard.
Though she may have been deprived of a life she wanted to have from the start, having a place in everyone’s heart, not for being the bitch but for being the Heechul that was finding her place in this society, is enough to make her happy and content even though she can no longer be with her loved ones.
Heechul.. Hangeng.. Donghae.. Eunhyuk..
Four characters who was searching a place in other’s hearts: longing to be loved, longing to find love, wanting to be known, wanted to belong. In the end there they were, finally ending up the search for their places… For now they each have a place in each other’s hearts; as a friend, as a brother, as a confidant, and most especially as a lover.
And so I’ll end this story with a happy note and a question to pose: Who holds a place in your heart?
Pairing: Hanchul, Eunhae, Hyukchul, Hanhae [girl! Donghae and HEechul]
Other: kangteuk, henyewook, kyumimin, shindong x [sunny/nariya]
Genre: friendship, angst , fluff
Rating: PG-13
Type: Multi-chaptered
Summary: Heechul wants everything but couldn't get any since Donghae unknowingly had them.
Warning: Character death, violence
A/N: this is the end finally after almost a year~~ this series is done^^
---o0o---
Their graduation marked the end of their school life and the start of a life long career. For Donghae and Eunhyuk, life has been really good and blissful: after 6 years of being a couple, they decided to tie the knot and get married in a very intimate and romantic wedding by the beach with all their close friends and mentors, except for Heechul and Hangeng who the couple wanted to their maid of honor and best man. During the reception, the couple paid a tribute to Heechul as Eunhyuk narrated her story through a slideshow of Donghae’s paintings dedicated to Heechul. Did I say paintings dedicated to Heechul? Yes Donghae created a collection of paintings dedicated to this misunderstood soul and has been given countless awards and recognitions for her work; Heechul was right to say that Donghae is a talented person.
If there is one thing that Eunhyuk and Donghae does every year, it is to commemorate Heechul’s Death Anniversary: for 7 years they have been continuously visiting her grave and give her offerings she deserve: her favorite flowers, expensive wines and succulent fruits. They both offer prayers and Eunhyuk never fails to perform for her and Donghae would tell her every detail of her works and how the critics praised her paintings of her.
But this year was different, on the 8th year of Heechul’s passing, Eunhyuk and Donghae came but now she was pregnant and as both Eunhyuk and Donghae were excited to tell Heechul of the news, they were surprised to see offerings already set on her grave and incense lighted. They looked around to see if there were other visitors but that day no one was present lest them.
Though bewildered, Eunhyuk and Donghae continued with their offering and commemoration. When they were finished, 2 lovely kids, aged roughly around 7 approached them and asked.
“Nimen renshi women mama?”
The girl in ponytail and purple dress asked. Donghae and eunhyuk of course didn’t understand the girl for she spoke Chinese, moreover they were surprised that the girl looked a lot like Heechul, a very pretty girl indeed.
“ah mianhe.. Do you know our mom?”
“ahh.. yes, She’s a friend.”
Eunhyuk answered though they were unsure why is the girl saying or claiming that Heechul was their mom. And they looked at the boy beside her and they can’t help but see the resemblance of Hangeng.
“ah.. Eunhyuk.. Donghae!”
Someone shouted which made both Eunhyuk and Donghae turn around, it was in fact Hangeng waving at them with a wide smile and not to mention an expensive Dior suit. Turns out that Hangeng has been very popular in China as an all around performer and actor, that he was busy with schedules during EunHae’s wedding.
“oppa!!!”
Donghae wanted to run but yeah, with her bulging tummy she can’t. Hangeng gave her a long hug and Eunhyuk shook his hands.
“papa.. wo renshi nimen?”
The boy asked and Hangeng introduced both parties.
“These are my kids, Joshua and Casey. Nimen shi Eunhyuk he Donghae, wo de pengyou.”
Eunhyuk smiled and the kids chuckled as they see his gums, cute kids the two thought. Hangeng seemed very happy seeing his good friends after 8 long years, and now he’s even more happy to hear about Donghae’s pregnancy.
They settled for a restaurant not far from the cemetery and as the kids roamed around the resto’s large outdoor landscaping, Hangeng decided to tell them his story, 8 years worth of updates that Donghae and Eunhyuk longed for.
“where do I start? You both know how my life has been.. after graduation I debuted as a dancer then a singer then a model and now a n actor.. I’m learning directing now.. I would want to direct a production someday.. maybe ask Siwon and Kibum to play the lead role.. “
Hangeng paused for a while as he stares at the setting sun, bright yellow and vibrant orange filling the horizon.
“no one knew I had kids.. moreover who their mother was. I know both of you are curious and confused seeing my kids..”
“Yeah I was surprised oppa.. but why do Casey looked a lot like Heechul Unnie?”
Donghae asked and Hangeng placidly smile, he missed this sweet side of Donghae.
“Heechul is their mom..”
“impossible!”
Eunhyuk interjected and Hangeng sighs before taking a sip of the pineapple juice.
“you see, 8 years ago, before I left Korea, I visited Heechul’s grave. I was planning to apologize to her, for making her life miserable and unbearable.. and also to confess my love for her. I know it’s damn too late but I really felt that it was the right thing to do. As I wept in her grave, a couple who was visiting Heechul too asked what my dilemma was. Turns out that they were Heechul’s friends...”
-Flashback-
“neh, sir why are you crying in front of Heechul’s grave? Is she your friend?”
The girl asked and Hangeng stood and faced the couple.
“Yeah.. she’s a friend..”
“is there any matter? You seemed very sad…”
“I just.. I never told her how much she means to me.. I’m a little too late..”
“I’m Jessica, this is my husband Jay. Heechul is a dear saeng of ours.”
Jessica and Jay shook Hangeng’s hands.
“nice to meet you.. I’m Hangeng.”
“oh really? Heechul was talking about you all the time.. she really likes you”
“I know.. but I wasn’t able to notice that before.. never gave her back the love she’d given me.”
Jessica and Jay felt his pain and they wished they could do to help him.
“I wish I could have something to remind me of her.. something I could keep with me.. to keep her alive in my heart.”
“maybe we could do something for you..”
Jay muttered and both hangeng and Jessica looked at him with question marks evident on their faces.
Jessica and Jay is a couple who weren’t able to conceive a child despite being married for 2 years. Heechul volunteered to donate her egg cells which the couple could use for artificial insemination. But three months after Heechul donated her egg cells, Jessica found out that she was in fact pregnant.
“Heechul’s egg cells were preserved and with artificial insemination, you could have children with Heechul.. you can keep her alive not only in your memory but through your child.”
Jay explained and Jessica smiled as she added.
“you don’t need to look for a surrogate mother, I could bear the child. Heechul was very supportive of Me and Jay when we were trying our best to conceive.. and even willingly donated her egg cells for me to use. Now that she is the one in need of help.. I’m not thinking twice about it..”
-end of flashback-
“so Jessica became the surrogate mother and it turns out to be twins: Casey and Joshua were both born on Heechul’s birthday.. kinda feels like Heechul really wanted to have this kids as her living memoir and remembrance. I was working in China when I got news of Jessica’s labor and I flew back to Korea as fast as I could to welcome the twins and I cried seeing Casey’s resemble to Heechul. Though we were never together, I felt that she really wanted to have a family with me… till now I can still her presence and love for our little family.”
Donghae was tearful as Hangeng ends his story.
“oppa!!!”
Hangeng smiled as he handed a handkerchief.
“You never change Hae.. you’re still this fragile lotus..”
“I can’t help it oppa.. till now, Heechul unnie is taking care of all of us, wanting us to have the life that we deserve.. I just wished we could give her that life back then right Hyukkie?!?”
Donghae turned to face his husband but she found a vacant seat instead.
“eh.. where did hyukkie go?”
Hangeng smiles as he points out outside by the sunset where Eunhyuk was standing alone and facing the setting sun.
“why is he…”
---o0o----
“noona..”
“I told you to drop the noona”
Eunhyuk smiled his gummy smile then sighs heavily.
“you must love having a family of your own.. Casey’s very pretty like you!”
“of course.. we are very pretty!”
Both of them smiled as they face the sun.
“neh.. hyukjae.. I am happy for you, soon you’ll be welcoming your son.”
“a son?! How could you tell?”
“duh hyukjae.. do I have to explain?!?”
“stupid me. But Heechul.. don’t you think it’s better that you were able to spend time with your kids, hug them and play with them?”
Eunhyuk asked, his tone was gloomy and Heechul can see his eyes filling with tears.
“Hyukjae.. don’t blame yourself. It’s better this way. You see, now I know that I hold a place in Hangeng’s heart.. though I may not be physically there for my family, having a family is something to be happy about.”
Heechul smiled a genuine smile which Eunhyuk remembered during their first encounter, the incident that made him know the fragile princess.
“I just wish you could’ve been there for my wedding.. it could have been an epic reception if Lady Hee Hee performed!”
Both of them laughs and Heechul gave him her final smile as she waves good bye and slowly faded with the blowing of the wind and blinding light of the sunset.
“take care hyukjae.. for you, hae and your family! Tell Hangeng and my kids that I love them so much!”
“good bye..”
Just as she faded into the wind and light, Casey and Joshua run towards him and asked him.
“uncle hyuk, did you just talk to omma?”
Casey asked and he nodded.
“yeah, she told me that she loves you both and most especially your dad.”
“really?! Omma is really sweet!”
Joshua mutters.
“so let’s go eat our dinner now?”
Eunhyuk asked as he grabs the children by their hands and led them back to the restaurant.
“omma visits us in our dreams.. she would always tell us how much she loves us.”
“really?! “
---o0o---
Hangeng smiles as he points out outside by the sunset where Eunhyuk was standing alone and facing the setting sun.
“why is he…”
Hangeng pointed at the spot beside Eunhyuk and Donghae concentrated her vision on the said spot and after a while, she gasped as she sees a silhouette which she recognizes as Heechul.
“Heechul unnie?”
Hangeng nodded.
“she never left us.. I can say that she is living the life she deserves, though she’s not here physically, she will always live in our hearts as we remember her as Heechul, the girl who longed to be loved.”
And as Hangeng spoke the last words, a gentle breeze blew and a faint and inaudible Saranghae was heard.
Though she may have been deprived of a life she wanted to have from the start, having a place in everyone’s heart, not for being the bitch but for being the Heechul that was finding her place in this society, is enough to make her happy and content even though she can no longer be with her loved ones.
Heechul.. Hangeng.. Donghae.. Eunhyuk..
Four characters who was searching a place in other’s hearts: longing to be loved, longing to find love, wanting to be known, wanted to belong. In the end there they were, finally ending up the search for their places… For now they each have a place in each other’s hearts; as a friend, as a brother, as a confidant, and most especially as a lover.
And so I’ll end this story with a happy note and a question to pose: Who holds a place in your heart?