its been awhile since ive written
its not that im too busy but recently ive made it a point to not write anymore. i just cant hide anymore. i cant just sit here and only express my innermost pains to a journal. getting your thoughts out in writing is one thing, but trying to hide from directly sharing your feelings with others is something entirely different.
anyway, this summer has really been a test of how far ive come and its showed me just how much things have changed. not that im anywhere near where i want to be, but maybe im not as far off as i thought.
today at work i had a pretty bad day. it was another day where i was so close to just breaking down. i happened to pass by a man sitting alone at a table while i was going to pick up a tip off of one of my tables. he said that i should smile more. i told him i was having a rough day. he told me that i should think about all the things i am grateful for in my life and just be happy. he was right. he said hes been having a rough month but didnt go into specifics. i told him that that was very good advice and i thanked him.
my day didnt really get that much better, but i definitely thought about what he said. i do tend to think negatively at times. it really is important just to live for the moment and not dwell on the big picture and all that bullcrap.
yeah, i fuckin hate my job. but with each passing week i can struggle through each day of torture just for those short periods of time where i can let go of all the pain and just...smile.
anyway, this summer has really been a test of how far ive come and its showed me just how much things have changed. not that im anywhere near where i want to be, but maybe im not as far off as i thought.
today at work i had a pretty bad day. it was another day where i was so close to just breaking down. i happened to pass by a man sitting alone at a table while i was going to pick up a tip off of one of my tables. he said that i should smile more. i told him i was having a rough day. he told me that i should think about all the things i am grateful for in my life and just be happy. he was right. he said hes been having a rough month but didnt go into specifics. i told him that that was very good advice and i thanked him.
my day didnt really get that much better, but i definitely thought about what he said. i do tend to think negatively at times. it really is important just to live for the moment and not dwell on the big picture and all that bullcrap.
yeah, i fuckin hate my job. but with each passing week i can struggle through each day of torture just for those short periods of time where i can let go of all the pain and just...smile.