Not what I was expecting
A lot has happened to my family & I recently. My aunt Susan died the day after graduation. She had been sick for 8 years, but should have lived at least 2 more years, long enough to see her daughter graduate from high school (she'll graduate this Thursday). She was on blood thinners for years and she fell and the impact from falling bumped her brain and caused an aneurism. The surgeon said the surgery would help her, and it did, but then her brain just kept bleeding until she went brain dead and eventually died. She died 4 days after she fell out of bed.
Her daughter (17) read this at her funeral, I forgot who really wrote it, but it's a great poem:
You can shed tears that she is gone
or you can smile because she has lived.
You can close your eyes and pray that she’ll come back
or you can open your eyes and see all she’s left.
Your heart can be empty because you can’t see her
or you can be full of the love you shared.
You can turn your back on tomorrow and live yesterday
or you can be happy for tomorrow because of yesterday.
You can remember her and only that she’s gone
or you can cherish her memory and let it live on.
You can cry and close your mind,
be empty and turn your back
or you can do what she’d want:
smile, open your eyes, love and go on.
I try very hard to think about this poem, but I really miss her a lot. She was my favorite aunt, I looked forward to the beach weeks I spent with her, my uncle & cousins every summer months ahead of time. She was the sweetest, funniest, most caring person I've met, and she hid the pain of her illness for years from coworkers and even us. Everyday for 8 years she felt like she had the flu and she worked 40hrs a week, took care of the kids & husband, and had fun and laughed like she was healthy as a horse. She had to give herself shots and take 100s of pills a day, she had to write her will and buy the best life insurance, she had to have a fever of 101 for 8 yrs because it was a side effect of a drug she couldn't live without. Not everyone can be as amazing as she was.
I think I've cried every night since she's died. I think about the 2 kids she left behind, and my uncle. They were together 30 years, married 23, they met at JMU their sophomore year. They were the most loving couple (though they did argue) that I have ever known. And those kids, Hunter's only 12, he's in 6th grade. It breaks my heart everytime I see him because he needs a hug every 5 minutes, he's such a sweetheart. And Alina, she's going to JMU this August and she's gonna be so alone without her mom. I'm gonna live here her first week so I can help her out if she feels alone.
And then I reeally feel horrible because I'm moving to Greensboro, NC and that's 6 hours away. Everytime Hunter brings it up he looks as though he's gonna cry. But I need to move, I need to start my life and get residency. I'm trying to get a job in the school system as an after school care provider, that way I'll have all the breaks that school kids get so I'll be able to visit home and my cousins a lot.
Hopefully everything works out.
Her daughter (17) read this at her funeral, I forgot who really wrote it, but it's a great poem:
You can shed tears that she is gone
or you can smile because she has lived.
You can close your eyes and pray that she’ll come back
or you can open your eyes and see all she’s left.
Your heart can be empty because you can’t see her
or you can be full of the love you shared.
You can turn your back on tomorrow and live yesterday
or you can be happy for tomorrow because of yesterday.
You can remember her and only that she’s gone
or you can cherish her memory and let it live on.
You can cry and close your mind,
be empty and turn your back
or you can do what she’d want:
smile, open your eyes, love and go on.
I try very hard to think about this poem, but I really miss her a lot. She was my favorite aunt, I looked forward to the beach weeks I spent with her, my uncle & cousins every summer months ahead of time. She was the sweetest, funniest, most caring person I've met, and she hid the pain of her illness for years from coworkers and even us. Everyday for 8 years she felt like she had the flu and she worked 40hrs a week, took care of the kids & husband, and had fun and laughed like she was healthy as a horse. She had to give herself shots and take 100s of pills a day, she had to write her will and buy the best life insurance, she had to have a fever of 101 for 8 yrs because it was a side effect of a drug she couldn't live without. Not everyone can be as amazing as she was.
I think I've cried every night since she's died. I think about the 2 kids she left behind, and my uncle. They were together 30 years, married 23, they met at JMU their sophomore year. They were the most loving couple (though they did argue) that I have ever known. And those kids, Hunter's only 12, he's in 6th grade. It breaks my heart everytime I see him because he needs a hug every 5 minutes, he's such a sweetheart. And Alina, she's going to JMU this August and she's gonna be so alone without her mom. I'm gonna live here her first week so I can help her out if she feels alone.
And then I reeally feel horrible because I'm moving to Greensboro, NC and that's 6 hours away. Everytime Hunter brings it up he looks as though he's gonna cry. But I need to move, I need to start my life and get residency. I'm trying to get a job in the school system as an after school care provider, that way I'll have all the breaks that school kids get so I'll be able to visit home and my cousins a lot.
Hopefully everything works out.