the bachelor
Ode to the Bachelor. One of my most favorite reality tv shows for reasons yet to be determined.
First and foremost, I like to make fun of everyone. I live for the group dates where everyone competes for the Bachelor's attention and he sits there helplessly as 15 girls pull out all the stops. Ultimately, the girl he likes the most is inevitably the one who isn't even trying. She's just kinda sitting there chilling out and not even participating, nonetheless every time the Bachelor is all enthralled. Note to self: If I am ever on the Bachelor, sit in the corner and pout so he thinks I am "mysterious" and gives me a rose.
Still, there is a little part of me that secretly watches the Bachelor and takes notes.
Bachelor: I hate it when girls are too clingy.
Me (thinking): Okay. Not needy. Check.
Bachelor: It's terrible when I can't tell what a girl is thinking and doesn't show affection.
Me (thinking): Oh, hmm. Not clingy. But affectionate. Ehh okay? I am confused.
And this process repeats, full of contradiction--ad nauseum, ad infinitum, until I am completely confused once again. So I have come to the conclusion tonight that guys don't even know what they want, but as long as you look like Barbie or something they'll gladly sacrifice "personality conflicts" or whatever excuses they may have for the other rejected girls in order to date you. Oh, the irony of it all. The clarity that comes with badly edited reality tv.
First and foremost, I like to make fun of everyone. I live for the group dates where everyone competes for the Bachelor's attention and he sits there helplessly as 15 girls pull out all the stops. Ultimately, the girl he likes the most is inevitably the one who isn't even trying. She's just kinda sitting there chilling out and not even participating, nonetheless every time the Bachelor is all enthralled. Note to self: If I am ever on the Bachelor, sit in the corner and pout so he thinks I am "mysterious" and gives me a rose.
Still, there is a little part of me that secretly watches the Bachelor and takes notes.
Bachelor: I hate it when girls are too clingy.
Me (thinking): Okay. Not needy. Check.
Bachelor: It's terrible when I can't tell what a girl is thinking and doesn't show affection.
Me (thinking): Oh, hmm. Not clingy. But affectionate. Ehh okay? I am confused.
And this process repeats, full of contradiction--ad nauseum, ad infinitum, until I am completely confused once again. So I have come to the conclusion tonight that guys don't even know what they want, but as long as you look like Barbie or something they'll gladly sacrifice "personality conflicts" or whatever excuses they may have for the other rejected girls in order to date you. Oh, the irony of it all. The clarity that comes with badly edited reality tv.