It was a crazy-ish day in the way of former flings...
So yesterday. It was one hell of a day.
I go to class to find out that a guy I've had a thing for since high school is in my class. He's the kind of guy that doesn't look like much, but his skill in the art of, well, pain, is remarkable. I think he would be one of the best lovers I've ever had. But it never quite got that far. And I doubt it will now.
I had lunch with 'the frat boy'. We pretty much haven't spoken since the fall of Freshman year. But there we are, chatting like old friends. We came back here and watched a movie, hung out for a little while. It was almost like he was interested. I hate to do it, but I wonder if it's some sort of joke.
Last night, I blew up on someone I used to love very much. Told him all the reasons why I don't know if I want to be his friend. It hurt a lot; it hurt both of us. But I felt that it needed to be said. My reasoning? Why do I want to hang out with you if I'm pretty sure that I'm just going to end up falling in love with you (again) and getting my heart broken (again)? There's no point.
And then, right before I go to bed, another former fling IMs me, to explain his disappearance from the world for the past few months. Kicking another addiction, it seems, and I'm very proud of him. It's almost like no time has passed between him and I.
I extremely dislike having to be all vague and nameless.
And now for something almost completely different but not quite,
Ethan. I love you. Sometimes you're the nails in my feet, keeping me grounded. Sometimes you're a beacon of light in the dark. But always, you are the one person I love more than I have ever loved before.
I miss you.
I go to class to find out that a guy I've had a thing for since high school is in my class. He's the kind of guy that doesn't look like much, but his skill in the art of, well, pain, is remarkable. I think he would be one of the best lovers I've ever had. But it never quite got that far. And I doubt it will now.
I had lunch with 'the frat boy'. We pretty much haven't spoken since the fall of Freshman year. But there we are, chatting like old friends. We came back here and watched a movie, hung out for a little while. It was almost like he was interested. I hate to do it, but I wonder if it's some sort of joke.
Last night, I blew up on someone I used to love very much. Told him all the reasons why I don't know if I want to be his friend. It hurt a lot; it hurt both of us. But I felt that it needed to be said. My reasoning? Why do I want to hang out with you if I'm pretty sure that I'm just going to end up falling in love with you (again) and getting my heart broken (again)? There's no point.
And then, right before I go to bed, another former fling IMs me, to explain his disappearance from the world for the past few months. Kicking another addiction, it seems, and I'm very proud of him. It's almost like no time has passed between him and I.
I extremely dislike having to be all vague and nameless.
And now for something almost completely different but not quite,
Ethan. I love you. Sometimes you're the nails in my feet, keeping me grounded. Sometimes you're a beacon of light in the dark. But always, you are the one person I love more than I have ever loved before.
I miss you.