Just more whining. Nothing to see here.
I am so TIRED of this. Everytime I think I'm getting ahead, I become aware of what feels like a million more things to do. Apparently I just barely passed my Soc test. 52. Good GOD. I didn't realize I was that bad. I'm not even concerned about it right now because I have so many other things on my mind. I'm waking up at nine or ten, doing school pretty much straight through till supper then doing more in the evening (unless Brandi comes over or I have to work, in which case... nope, I usually do homework while we hang out or while I'm at work). It feels like all this information is going in one ear and out the other, nothing is sinking in. Psychology is now into the biological part of the unit, which- yes- means science, which means I'm totally fucking screwed because I am so stupid when it to anything involving science. My brain just shuts off completely. And I'm behind again in Religion because I couldn't care less about that course and I'm not really doing anything which is totally going to mean I'm fucked to all hell in December when I have my exam. Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck. I just want to DIE. I'm so sick of everything, and nobody can help me which is the problem and to top it all off, Brandi might not move next year with me to the city for University and now I feel like I'm going to be totally alone. I'm never going to be able to survive. I'm so up and down these days because I'll have a good day or two and then the world will come crashing down on me all over again. It's the same cycle over and over, and it's only October, except it's not, it's like half done the term already and that freaks me right out because I feel like I don't have enough time for anything. My parents keep telling me that I can do it, but I just want to give up. I'm not smart enough. I feel like I can't handle this.
I'm going to go crawl into a corner and try not to cry. Again.