spoiled, much?

[chibiroriita]

So I've been thinking that people actually hate me :D [emo mode: ON] Seriously. Because... I often have the feeling that people are avoiding me. I'm quite awared that my manners aren't the best, really. I'm too... how can I say? Honest? xD I don't care much about others feelings... I just say everything as it comes to me mind. It's not very mature, I know (d'oh!). So it's pretty much selfish to expect that people care about me, isn't it? Well, I do not expect. But I can't fake that I don't care about the fact that people hate me. I mean... not anyone. I couldn't care less about what unknow people think, but actually people that I like. Probably they don't even know that I like them (I'm not very like: "hey, you! I like you :)", but whatever). Self-control must be a wonderful thing, isn't it? *-* But isn't it a pain to want to throw things away and smile instead? .-. I wonder. I always do everything that pleases me. I know that there'll be consequences, I'm not a child anymore, but still I know that I behave like one. A spoiled one, for sure.

And even knowing all that I still won't change? :X

Well, just thinking... That's not like I'm going to do something about it. Just because many things bothers me it doesn't mean I'm not happy, right? :) (I'm stupid --')