(no subject)
After a ridiculous amount of texting, it gets down to, Sorry can't be bothered. Why not just say you were going to be else where from the start rather than get my hopes up? Now I have to either mail out the gifts, rather than hand them off, or say fuckit and they can all wait. I haven't seen anyone in what, a month or more 2-3 pending which person, so I was really looking forward to this. I may just opt for fuckit and wait till my next check.
I don't think I've ever been more thankful that I'm going to be at work all of the following week. And I can only pray I won't be talked at for the duration of the same week. May seems all too close. I don't think I will ever be ready for it.
Hopefully my mood will lighten up come the time I wake up.
My Xmas was both good and bad. My Mom spoiled me, and despite me not asking for anything, she got me DJ Hero. And a few cell phone charms. To bad my dumbass sister and father wanted to ruin what lil' good mood I had with a yelling fight of epic-ly stupid style shit. I was polite through the whole damn day. Even let my sister spend the night cause my Mom asked nicely, for Xmas eve. I wanted to kill her during the whole night, as no matter what I was doing she commented on every thing. And even jumped in on Sarahi's and my conversation like she knew what the fuck she was talking about. This was way too much personal space being invaded for me. So when Mom out the damn blue asks her if she wants to spend the night again. I quickly said no, she's going home that night. I'm tired of being talked at, asked about shit, and having to explain every fucking thing I'm doing. I've grown used to being alone. And I damn sure don't care for her company.
So I get yelled at by Dad who tells me it isn't my place to say if she can spend the night or not. Fucker it's my room and my bed. I think I have a say in who goes in there. Tells me that my bed is actually Elisha's bed and will always be her bed, and her room and I ain't got shit to say about it. Which lead to more pissed off words. Then Elisha's dumb ass goes and tells me that if I don't like it, I should have moved out by now. Rather than spend my money on conventions, magazines and dolls.
WTH?! Clearly the bitch doesn't know what I spend my money on. What I own as far as those things has taken me YEARS. This year was a surprising one where I managed to obtain 2 dolls thanks to layaway and buying from a local doll person. I give more than half my check to my Mom. What I do with the rest is my own damn business. And I'm staying here purely because my Mother needs me. I didn't bail out on my Mother like she did. And that means I get perks like buying purely luxury items, that boil down to fancy shit to look at. You can be jealous of that all you damn well please. But don't you dare tell me how to fucking spend my money when I know you haven't given Mom gas in the past month, and haven't paid your rent. But continue to order fast food and buy useless baubles.
But no it gets better than that bullshit. She goes as far as to say outloud, "She wouldn't do this to Kati!" Thankfully I chose to ignore that one. But seriously? FUCKING SERIOUSLY?! WHERE DO YOU GET OFF EVEN TRYING TO COMPARE YOURSELF TO KATI? You can't nor ever will be on the same level of the wonderful person she was. She was there for me so many times I loose count. Can I honestly get past one hand with the favors you've done for me, that haven't resulted in me later on getting fucked over due to me doing you a favor? Nope sure as fuck can't.
Now Dad is doing childish ass bullshit, like standing in my bed room and blowing smoke on my face. Waking me up, because WHAT DO YOU KNOW, I can't breathe. Trying to steal my keys, and get into arguments over whether it's too cold to let the dogs in for the night, trying to starts over nothing, and blaming me for anything that turns up broken. Because he's dubbed her the favorite child, because she "moved out" funny I see the woman every damn day and now Mom is stuck carting her around while she doesn't pay for the damn gas. Yeah, it's totally like she's moved out. All while gaining more and more weight and complaining about how she can't breathe. XI
I really won't be at ease till we move out of this house and into a better place. Away from Dad and further away from my sister. Who for some damn reason thinks she might be able to move in with us. ...Ummm, NO! If she moved in with us, we would make too much money for Section 8. And given how much my skin was crawling with what ended up being a 2 night stay, after I had to force a fucking apology from her. I'd say I'd end up killing the woman.
Urgh, I'm just going to go to bed. I hope I will feel better after some sleep.
I don't think I've ever been more thankful that I'm going to be at work all of the following week. And I can only pray I won't be talked at for the duration of the same week. May seems all too close. I don't think I will ever be ready for it.
Hopefully my mood will lighten up come the time I wake up.
My Xmas was both good and bad. My Mom spoiled me, and despite me not asking for anything, she got me DJ Hero. And a few cell phone charms. To bad my dumbass sister and father wanted to ruin what lil' good mood I had with a yelling fight of epic-ly stupid style shit. I was polite through the whole damn day. Even let my sister spend the night cause my Mom asked nicely, for Xmas eve. I wanted to kill her during the whole night, as no matter what I was doing she commented on every thing. And even jumped in on Sarahi's and my conversation like she knew what the fuck she was talking about. This was way too much personal space being invaded for me. So when Mom out the damn blue asks her if she wants to spend the night again. I quickly said no, she's going home that night. I'm tired of being talked at, asked about shit, and having to explain every fucking thing I'm doing. I've grown used to being alone. And I damn sure don't care for her company.
So I get yelled at by Dad who tells me it isn't my place to say if she can spend the night or not. Fucker it's my room and my bed. I think I have a say in who goes in there. Tells me that my bed is actually Elisha's bed and will always be her bed, and her room and I ain't got shit to say about it. Which lead to more pissed off words. Then Elisha's dumb ass goes and tells me that if I don't like it, I should have moved out by now. Rather than spend my money on conventions, magazines and dolls.
WTH?! Clearly the bitch doesn't know what I spend my money on. What I own as far as those things has taken me YEARS. This year was a surprising one where I managed to obtain 2 dolls thanks to layaway and buying from a local doll person. I give more than half my check to my Mom. What I do with the rest is my own damn business. And I'm staying here purely because my Mother needs me. I didn't bail out on my Mother like she did. And that means I get perks like buying purely luxury items, that boil down to fancy shit to look at. You can be jealous of that all you damn well please. But don't you dare tell me how to fucking spend my money when I know you haven't given Mom gas in the past month, and haven't paid your rent. But continue to order fast food and buy useless baubles.
But no it gets better than that bullshit. She goes as far as to say outloud, "She wouldn't do this to Kati!" Thankfully I chose to ignore that one. But seriously? FUCKING SERIOUSLY?! WHERE DO YOU GET OFF EVEN TRYING TO COMPARE YOURSELF TO KATI? You can't nor ever will be on the same level of the wonderful person she was. She was there for me so many times I loose count. Can I honestly get past one hand with the favors you've done for me, that haven't resulted in me later on getting fucked over due to me doing you a favor? Nope sure as fuck can't.
Now Dad is doing childish ass bullshit, like standing in my bed room and blowing smoke on my face. Waking me up, because WHAT DO YOU KNOW, I can't breathe. Trying to steal my keys, and get into arguments over whether it's too cold to let the dogs in for the night, trying to starts over nothing, and blaming me for anything that turns up broken. Because he's dubbed her the favorite child, because she "moved out" funny I see the woman every damn day and now Mom is stuck carting her around while she doesn't pay for the damn gas. Yeah, it's totally like she's moved out. All while gaining more and more weight and complaining about how she can't breathe. XI
I really won't be at ease till we move out of this house and into a better place. Away from Dad and further away from my sister. Who for some damn reason thinks she might be able to move in with us. ...Ummm, NO! If she moved in with us, we would make too much money for Section 8. And given how much my skin was crawling with what ended up being a 2 night stay, after I had to force a fucking apology from her. I'd say I'd end up killing the woman.
Urgh, I'm just going to go to bed. I hope I will feel better after some sleep.