(no subject)
he's so different from the friend i had in my head. the friend who i used to spend countless hours on the phone with, and who made me think and wonder what the hell was going on in his head. the friend who used to call me every day, even though he had nothing to say. i used to think he was so great. but i really don't know who he is anymore. we never actually talk. we hang out, but it's always with other people, and we always talk to everyone else in the room besides each other. it's like being in a room with a couple that just broke up, even though we were never a couple. sometimes he says things to me that are just downright mean.. and i just don't understand him. why would someone who is supossed to be your friend say things that are just so mean? i'll never confront him because it's just not that big of a deal. his insults don't hurt me personally, it's just the fact that he would try to hurt me that bothers me. i don't understand him, and i'm sure he does that in purpose. he doesn't want to be understood... but maybe he doesn't really want to be my friend anymore, either. maybe i'm just a person who fill his time with.
.
on an attempt to stop chewing my knuckles, i stopped chewing all but one. the others are starting to look better, but that one is looking like hell. i just tore another piece of skin off and now it is bleeding all over the place. the blood is spilling all over my hand and filling upt he cracks in my skin as i continue to type, and it almost made me miss the days when i used to bleed on a regular basis.
.
on an attempt to stop chewing my knuckles, i stopped chewing all but one. the others are starting to look better, but that one is looking like hell. i just tore another piece of skin off and now it is bleeding all over the place. the blood is spilling all over my hand and filling upt he cracks in my skin as i continue to type, and it almost made me miss the days when i used to bleed on a regular basis.