i should have fucking stayed home!
this is what isn't cool about living alone: nobody is here to ask why my night was so fucked up or why i'm bawling like i little fucking kid. i've called everyone who knows me twice and no ones answering. i had a lot of fun hanging out at josh's but then i went out with some of my old friends and have come to the conclusion that no one thinks i'm shit! no body fucking cares whats going to hurt my feelings and make me feel like trash... and the worst part of it is is at the end of the night i go and make it worse for myself! right now i jut want someone to care, i want someone who will come racing over just to give me a hug and say that they care if i make it home at the end of the fucking night. i don't care if its my mom or the next door fucking nieghbor, just someone! god! i try so hard to make believe that the single life is just great and i don't need anyone else... but fuck. everything in me just hurts right now.