Chessiegirl's Product of the Week - Vend-A-Pet I. D. Tag Machine
The reason I have chosen this particular subject as my Product of the Week (in conjunction with http://www.frog.horizonpurple.com/), is simply because I recently had the misfortune to use one.
In the outside hall at the Walmart store in a town near to where I was visiting my family this week, is a variety of vending machines. There are the usual gum-ball and press-on-tattoo machines, along with several other machines boasting holographic images of Britney Spears for $.50 and even some that sold miniature men called "Homies". The one that caught my eye was the Vend-a-Pet I. D. Tag engraving machine. For the paltry sum of $4.00, you could create an I.D. tag for your pet in a matter of minutes and even watch while it was being engraved.
I don't know what possessed me to try it at that particular moment. My aunt and sister were still in the store as I had finished checking out first and I had been meaning to get a metal I.D. tag for our newest cat so it seemed like a good time to finally get it done.
I wandered closer and saw that the machine touted, "Make a Metal Engraved I.D. Tag for Your Pet Instantly! Several Styles and Sizes to Choose From!". The directions were easy enough, slide the money in and start filling out the name of your animal, your phone number, town and state using the handy touch-screen. Everything went fine until I got to the last line and needed to write in the words, "Flushing". They kept telling me it was too many letters so I cut out the comma between the town and the state and it still said it was too many letters. I finally had to make a tag that said "Flushng" with no "i". Sheesh.
Watching the machine engrave the tag was sort of interesting and as I was wondering about the inner workings of the software program used to run the little robot arm, I completely forgot about my sister and aunt who by now had walked out to my aunt's car because they had not seen me standing off to the side in the foyer. Finally the engraving was done and a message came up that read, "Now, remove your tag and accompanying clasp from the metal tray below".
What I hadn't realized before I started this whole procedure was that someone had stolen the little metal tray the tag was supposed to drop into. I had noticed there was not one there but I thought it was one of those kind that slid out like a drawer that some of the money machines have.
When the little engraving robot arm released my finished metal tag, it went flying into the bottom of the machine with a nice little "ping, ping, ping" sound. I looked down into the hole where the tray was supposed to be and there, about 3 feet down, was the metal tag resting on the bottom. Frustration gave way to hope as I also saw the tag was only an inch or so away from an open area near the plastic front where you could see the floor. I figured all I had to do was find something long enough to reach down there and I could coax the tag to the edge and it would drop onto the floor and I could get it. Easy.
About this time my sister came looking for me and I told her I was going to go look for a broom or a yardstick and left her standing by the machine. The elderly door greeter standing just inside the entrance doors was not helpful at all. She just stared at me blankly while I explained the situation. First she said, "Well, I don't know where maintenance is right now." I said, "I don't need a maintenance man, I just need something with a long handle like a broom." She said, "There's the service counter, go down there and they can refund your money," Sigh. I could tell there was no reasoning with her. I walked down to the service counter to inquire if they had a broom because it was just silly to ask for my money back when the tag was within easy reach. I stood in one of the two lines and as soon as it was my turn, the clerk who was to have waited on me decided to leave for a lunch break. I turned to get in the other line and several people walked up right before me. Feeling horribly annoyed, I walked back to the exit doors with the intention of going outside the store and looking for a long stick.
When I got back to my sister, I found her and a different elderly door greeter peering down into the little hole in the machine. Suddenly the first door greeter walked up with a broom and the two door greeters got to work. The problem was, neither of them had very good eyesight so they couldn't see what they were doing.
I watched helplessly as they whacked my little tag all around the bottom of the machine with the handle of the broom until they complained they could no longer see it at all and one left to get a flashlight, leaving the other one in charge of the broom.
At this point, I managed sneak up and peer into the hole and saw that my tag was resting way over against the edge in the bottom but very near to the front open gap. I also noticed with a slight degree of comfort that the bottom of the machine held about ten other engraved pet tags of all shapes and sizes from some poor souls who had done the same thing I had. This proved I wasn't the only moron in town. Meanwhile, the first lady came back with a huge flashlight and both of them had to do more peering, whacking and discussing of which way to point the flashlight. Somewhere around this point, my sister went to tell my aunt why we were taking so long in the foyer of Walmart. Finally I said to the two ladies, "Look, I'll get down on the ground right here and pull on the plastic front of this machine and as I pull it out a bit, you take the broom and try to whack the tag forward and hopefully it will come out easier because it will have more room." It took the woman several times but finally my little tag dropped onto the cement floor and I picked it up, murmured some embarrassed thank you's, ran out the exit doors and jumped into the waiting car of my aunt and sped away.
I could not find a picture of one of these types of vending machines but here is an article on how you can boost your sales by putting one in your store (if you happen to have a store):
http://www.businesssolutionsmag.com/Articles/1999_06/990606.htm
I'm not sure what that I can whole-heartedly endorse the Vend-A-Pet I.D. Tag at this time. The missing tray was a bit off-putting and with regards to the choice of tags, I do feel the red/white and blue flag tag was just a tad tacky and the Spiderman II tag was blatant commercialism. Other than that, the choices were varied and in good taste and I wound up with a lovely, tiny, purple heart-shaped tag. (We won't mention my town is spelled wrong and it has no clasp with which to fasten it to the cat's collar.)
Let me also say I cannot vouch for the ability of Walmart door greeters to handle Vending Machine Emergencies. Although they did come through in the end with both a broom and a flashlight and TWO helpful people, I have my doubts as to whether anyone will ever put a sign on the machine reading, "Out of Order".
In the outside hall at the Walmart store in a town near to where I was visiting my family this week, is a variety of vending machines. There are the usual gum-ball and press-on-tattoo machines, along with several other machines boasting holographic images of Britney Spears for $.50 and even some that sold miniature men called "Homies". The one that caught my eye was the Vend-a-Pet I. D. Tag engraving machine. For the paltry sum of $4.00, you could create an I.D. tag for your pet in a matter of minutes and even watch while it was being engraved.
I don't know what possessed me to try it at that particular moment. My aunt and sister were still in the store as I had finished checking out first and I had been meaning to get a metal I.D. tag for our newest cat so it seemed like a good time to finally get it done.
I wandered closer and saw that the machine touted, "Make a Metal Engraved I.D. Tag for Your Pet Instantly! Several Styles and Sizes to Choose From!". The directions were easy enough, slide the money in and start filling out the name of your animal, your phone number, town and state using the handy touch-screen. Everything went fine until I got to the last line and needed to write in the words, "Flushing". They kept telling me it was too many letters so I cut out the comma between the town and the state and it still said it was too many letters. I finally had to make a tag that said "Flushng" with no "i". Sheesh.
Watching the machine engrave the tag was sort of interesting and as I was wondering about the inner workings of the software program used to run the little robot arm, I completely forgot about my sister and aunt who by now had walked out to my aunt's car because they had not seen me standing off to the side in the foyer. Finally the engraving was done and a message came up that read, "Now, remove your tag and accompanying clasp from the metal tray below".
What I hadn't realized before I started this whole procedure was that someone had stolen the little metal tray the tag was supposed to drop into. I had noticed there was not one there but I thought it was one of those kind that slid out like a drawer that some of the money machines have.
When the little engraving robot arm released my finished metal tag, it went flying into the bottom of the machine with a nice little "ping, ping, ping" sound. I looked down into the hole where the tray was supposed to be and there, about 3 feet down, was the metal tag resting on the bottom. Frustration gave way to hope as I also saw the tag was only an inch or so away from an open area near the plastic front where you could see the floor. I figured all I had to do was find something long enough to reach down there and I could coax the tag to the edge and it would drop onto the floor and I could get it. Easy.
About this time my sister came looking for me and I told her I was going to go look for a broom or a yardstick and left her standing by the machine. The elderly door greeter standing just inside the entrance doors was not helpful at all. She just stared at me blankly while I explained the situation. First she said, "Well, I don't know where maintenance is right now." I said, "I don't need a maintenance man, I just need something with a long handle like a broom." She said, "There's the service counter, go down there and they can refund your money," Sigh. I could tell there was no reasoning with her. I walked down to the service counter to inquire if they had a broom because it was just silly to ask for my money back when the tag was within easy reach. I stood in one of the two lines and as soon as it was my turn, the clerk who was to have waited on me decided to leave for a lunch break. I turned to get in the other line and several people walked up right before me. Feeling horribly annoyed, I walked back to the exit doors with the intention of going outside the store and looking for a long stick.
When I got back to my sister, I found her and a different elderly door greeter peering down into the little hole in the machine. Suddenly the first door greeter walked up with a broom and the two door greeters got to work. The problem was, neither of them had very good eyesight so they couldn't see what they were doing.
I watched helplessly as they whacked my little tag all around the bottom of the machine with the handle of the broom until they complained they could no longer see it at all and one left to get a flashlight, leaving the other one in charge of the broom.
At this point, I managed sneak up and peer into the hole and saw that my tag was resting way over against the edge in the bottom but very near to the front open gap. I also noticed with a slight degree of comfort that the bottom of the machine held about ten other engraved pet tags of all shapes and sizes from some poor souls who had done the same thing I had. This proved I wasn't the only moron in town. Meanwhile, the first lady came back with a huge flashlight and both of them had to do more peering, whacking and discussing of which way to point the flashlight. Somewhere around this point, my sister went to tell my aunt why we were taking so long in the foyer of Walmart. Finally I said to the two ladies, "Look, I'll get down on the ground right here and pull on the plastic front of this machine and as I pull it out a bit, you take the broom and try to whack the tag forward and hopefully it will come out easier because it will have more room." It took the woman several times but finally my little tag dropped onto the cement floor and I picked it up, murmured some embarrassed thank you's, ran out the exit doors and jumped into the waiting car of my aunt and sped away.
I could not find a picture of one of these types of vending machines but here is an article on how you can boost your sales by putting one in your store (if you happen to have a store):
http://www.businesssolutionsmag.com/Articles/1999_06/990606.htm
I'm not sure what that I can whole-heartedly endorse the Vend-A-Pet I.D. Tag at this time. The missing tray was a bit off-putting and with regards to the choice of tags, I do feel the red/white and blue flag tag was just a tad tacky and the Spiderman II tag was blatant commercialism. Other than that, the choices were varied and in good taste and I wound up with a lovely, tiny, purple heart-shaped tag. (We won't mention my town is spelled wrong and it has no clasp with which to fasten it to the cat's collar.)
Let me also say I cannot vouch for the ability of Walmart door greeters to handle Vending Machine Emergencies. Although they did come through in the end with both a broom and a flashlight and TWO helpful people, I have my doubts as to whether anyone will ever put a sign on the machine reading, "Out of Order".