epiphany

Jan 05, 2006 22:43

I had quite a startling realization today. When I write this I am being neither pessimistic nor sarcastic. I mean this in all seriousness and am seriously debating giving up on the whole thing.

But enough avoiding...here is my epiphany:

I repel any male who is not either:
A) Constantly high off of marijuana, coke, LSD, and any other mind altering substance or,
B) gay

No one person is responsible for this incredible phenomena, not even myself.
My life would probably be better if I was a lesbian because it doesn't seem to affect women, but alas, my love of the male body and personality (however arrogant and lewd) prevails.

This realization has led me to the conclusion that I will spend my days alone in the country surrounded by my many dogs.

I suppose I exude an aura of awkwardness that simply dissuades any male, attractive or not, from approaching me, even as a friend. I suppose the ones who are high do not recognize this weird aura and the ones who are gay hardly care.

I will admit that this epiphany somewhat depresses me, I feel very lonely. But tomorrow I should be better, I always am.

Please understand that I didn't write this for pity-after all, I'm sure the one person who does read my entries has given up on me-I just wrote this so that I would not forget.

Now I find I don't really care. Highly interesting.
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