christmastime
nothing makes me miss home and high school and the past more than christmastime. listening to the little bit of christmas music i have on my computer, almost all of which were the songs i sang in chorus and at disney's candlelight processional, one of which i sang solo at my church when i was 15 on christmas eve, and another i sang acapella with three other chorus friends for a newlywed couple standing in line for aerosmith's rockin' rollercoaster... these are some of the most amazing memories i have- some of the best moments of my life... and i miss the feeling i had in those moments. i miss the friends i shared them with. i miss my family and how we would drink apple cider and hot cocoa while eating christmas cookies decorating the tree and the house listening to and singing along with christmas music with the whole family and all the family friends... i miss peeking at all the presents under the tree and telling my little brother, against his wishes, what he was getting for christmas. i miss being able to afford to buy presents for my friends and family. i miss the excitement and the magic of christmas. it is so hard to get into the feel of it when everyone around you is able to give a good christmas but you... and i just can't wait for the future christmases with my family. i can't wait to make our own traditions while adding in a few of the ones we grew up with for our little rowan. i can't wait for the new and better christmas memories of the future... i can't wait to be able to afford to give him great christmas memories...
yeah. that's all i got.
yeah. that's all i got.