(no subject)
oh how i know this all too well.
Daddy-
It's father's day. And I don't care.
I don't care that your only child isn't there with you. I don't care if you're sad because you're not getting a card. I don't care. Don't expect a card. Don't expect a present. If you get one that gramma says is from me, it isn't.
I'm tired of you calling to vent. I'm tired of you forgetting my birthday. I'm tired of you not asking me how I am, and what's new with me.
I hate being lied to. I hate that you've claimed sobriety for the last 4 years. You're a liar. I'm just tired of YOU. I spent the first 18 years of my life trying to get your attention and love. And I've wasted the last five years of my life trying to forget about everything. I can't. I can't forget the days and weeks you'd dissapear. I can't forget the stuff you stole from me to pawn for drugs. I will not forget you taking me to Robert's and making me wait outside while you get your fix. I will never forget you dumping me at Mom's and not coming back. I will never forget that the night mom told me what was really wrong with you. I will never forget, nor will I forgive.
I have your eyes and nose. I have mom's attitude and hands. I took the worst part of you, and turned it into the best part of me.
You may always think of me as your baby, your little girl. But I grew up a long time ago.