Lists
I've been making lists. They're not lists of directions I plan to take or goals I want to achieve through discipline and planning, but rather lists of things I want out of life or in a job or in a husband. These lists are like prayers to the forces that be to acknowledge these things that I want so that I or they or a combination of the both of us will do things in my life to help me attain these things. When you're planning your life on wishes or ideas you have to be very creative and think of it as a story. You have to be prepared to go through a lot of shit to get what you want and even after that, there will be other shit to go through but if what you want was also what you needed, that shit will be a whole lot easier to go through when you get to it. You also have to be prepared to stick to your beliefs and values when the fight matters the most. One of my beliefs is that I would never forgive myself for working in a job where my employers put me in a cubicle. I will not live like that. This is part of one of my lists. I don't know how the hell I'm going to get from sixteen to fifty at this point and I don't care to know until after it has already happened, but I can start off knowing that the universe knows what I'm out there looking for if I damn well please.