So anyway

Jul 07, 2006 14:14

Everybody fucking read this. For serious. This is the last entry I'm ever making in this LJ.
(I'll make a new one soon and add you if I love you.)

I'm so sick and fucking tired of JRock. No, you don't understand yet.

I'm so sick of people caring what country their music from. I'm sick of people complaining about what language music is in. I'm sick of people caring what a band looks like and what they wear. I used to be on the other side of this argument, demanding equality from western music fans.

Well? Now I'm on the other side. I respect music too much to deny good music from anywhere or anyone, or to accept it being denied. Coincidentally I also respect guitar too much to tolerate bands with craptacular, adorable guitarists, and if you listen to them your musical taste automatically defaults to, "JRock Twat" on the skill grid.

I'd like this to be the last time I discuss this reasonably, so I might take a moment or two to do so. This, however, is me (not so) politely bowing out of a fandom I was never actually a part of, even if I didn't know it.

The first matter, of course, is explaining to JRock Twats and Oshare Retards why. Normally I wouldn't waste my omniscience on such an obtuse question, but when provided with an opportunity to flame bad music I rarely back down.

Stop calling it JRock, to begin with. Don't introduce L'Arc to somebody as a fucking JRock band. JRock isn't a genre of music here; it's a fandom. Calling L'Arc a JRock band insinuates to somebody that they have to exist in the fandom to enjoy them efficiently.

They are a fucking rock band. I'm not going to say don't RP smut with them and don't dress up like them; that's your own call. However, do not, and this is fucking serious, do NOT encourage this behavior.

Before I go on to explain the lack of talent present in most eastern music I'd like to take a moment. Do I sound bitter? Do you think I'm going overboard, perhaps? Well, I am bitter. I was tricked. Tricked by idiots. By histrionic idiots who are incapable of identifying a Floyd Rose from a pink leopard print ass flap. Shut-in idiots who dress up in stupid clothes, plaster their faces with ridiculous make-up, and bring children, fucking children into this fandom talking about wanting to molest grown men. Musicians. That's not "omg repressed desires!" that's your fandom fucking up fourteen year old girls.

I was one of them. Granted I had a penis. I was introduced to X and Siam Shade and I fucking loved them. I loved them both and I was told that I loved them because they were JRock.

No.

I loved them because I love rock. I love great guitar work. I love hide and Daita in a way no JRock Twat could ever comprehend. I love Daita's pickup configuration, hide's hi-watts, Daita's mode progressions, hide tracking old Les Pauls over each other in track recordings. I didn't know as much about guitar or music back then, but I figured that's what people were talking about. I was wrong.

Any guitarist who puts more time into deciding what asinine fabric to plaster together than guitar tone needs to die in a fire.

Unfortunately, judging by most contemporary Japanese rock bands, the number of guitarists in the east who deserve to live is shockingly low. Your Oshare boy can't play guitar and he needs to stop trying. It's insulting, granted not as insulting as your dumbass listening to it.

I'm being a bit more serious now, and since this is this LJ's farewell I think you should buck up and listen.

Go into your iTunes and take the J out from before every instance of Rock that you can find. If it's The Pillows replace it with "Punk". If it's X take the whole thing out and type in "Metal". Be a little more realistic with yourself. Either you're a fandom 'tard or you listen to good tunes. There's no middle ground, only treachery.

Oh, and if you only listen to eastern music? Fuck you. I can't even begin to explain how insulting that is. Don't give me that, "It's different!" shit - everything's different. Different people make it, but it's based somewhere, and in JRock it's usually based somewhere in the west. You can plan on never, ever talking to me about music if you listen to X and not Iron Maiden or Motley Crue. If you listen to Ellegarden and not Weezer. If you listen to L'Arc and not The Beetles. Go punch yourself in the tit a few times until you figure out how music works.

Ftr I don't mean that specifically, I just wanted to make a definitive statement about where these bands people worship came from. Also you can punch yourself anywhere, or even find other people to punch you.

The rest of you, however...

I always loved you outside of the fandom. See you soon, internet cowboys.
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