Colins Story: Part 3
"Good morning Colin, Landen's in the back yard you can go right on out." Mr. Dean is always so friendly to me, I really think this whole family is just happy Landen has a friend.
"Thanks Mr. Dean." I say and I make my way through the house to the back door. Sure enough Landen is out back throwing horseshoes at the pit. In the freezing cold. Typical Landen. He doesn't notice me at first so I stay silent and watch him. He's always been good at this game, and he does a little dance whenever he get's a few in a row. He's adorable.
"Hey." I say, I really don't know how I want to start this. He turns at the sound of my voice and smiles his beautiful smile, it breaks my heart.
"Colin. Hey I wasn't expecting you today!" He says making his way over to me. "Wanna play?"
I agree but only because I'm too nervous to say what I came here for. We play for a while and it feels just as if last night never happened. We joke, we laugh, we talk about random topics but I notice he doesn't try to flirt with me, and I avoid making gay jokes where normally these things are fair game. Before I realized it hours have passed. It's now or never.
"We need to talk."
He stops mid throw and turns to face me, his eyes look sad, but almost hopeful. He wants to be wrong. "I understand Colin, can i know why?"
I shrug. "I'm not gay." i barely whisper this, I can't tell if I'm lying or not.
Landens eyebrow raises "You didn't seem to care if you were gay when you kissed me."
Every time i think about that kiss my stomach does flips and I have to fight the urge to grab him again.
"Well i wasn't thinking clearly last night. I'm not gay and I don't think we should hangout anymore." There. I said it. I try not to look at his face because I know there will be tears in his eyes and if I see them I won't be able to stop myself.
"Bye Landen." That's all i say before going around the house to my car, I don't want to go through and face his family.
***********
I feel myself being pulled backwards; someone has a hold of my backpack.
“Hey!” It's a reasonable knee jerk reaction but my attacker lets go and I fall backwards into the lockers. It's Alissa Dean. I try to right myself but she grabs the front of my shirt with a balled fist.
“'Lis, I'm just trying to get to class.”
“Shut up.” She leans her face close to mine, up close I can see how much like her brother she actually looks and it's nauseating. “You ever come near my brother again and I will personally cut off your testicles and feed them to my horse.”
I swallow, unsure of what to say. “I-”
“No. No excuses Colin, you hurt him and honestly you're lucky I'm on school probation or I'd beat your ass right here.”
She's staring right into my eyes and it makes me need to look away but I'm afraid to. I think she'd punch me if I did. I want to tell her that I spent last night in tears, writing and re-writing texts that I never sent, dialing his number and never hitting call, I have at least 6 hand written letters balled up on my bedroom floor. I want to tell her that I'm sorry I take it all back and god she looks like her brother at the right angles. I swallow the lump in my throat and look her in the eyes, her brothers dark green eyes.
“Okay.” I think my voice cracks. She lets go of my shirt but holds me to the lockers for another moment while she looks me up and down. “Don't cross my path again scumbag.”
She storms off towards the main floor exit. Typical Alissa, she probably only showed up today to do this. I had noticed Landen isn't here.
I wait a moment and then head towards the exit myself. I can't do this, not today.
In the car I grip the steering wheel so tight I see my knuckles turn white but I don't care. Why is this happening? Why do I love him? Why couldn't it have been Alissa? She has the same face but I've never been lost in the green of her eyes, never caught my breath when she smiled, I've never once imagined that her lips could be as soft as Landens. Why does it have to be him?
*****************
I take Dusty Joy to the prom and have a great time. Landen and Alissa show up an hour late. Not that I'm looking for them.
The school year ends and the summer passes. Avery says I'm becoming withdrawn and anti-social but I don't think so. I spent plenty of time out of the house, it's just my friends don't get it. No one get's it. Not even Av'.
Senior year begins and there's a new girl at our school; Marie Grace Rider.
“Yes this is my real hair.” Is the first thing she says to me, I raise an eyebrow.
“Ummm...My name's Colin. I just wanted to say hi.”
Her eyes get wide and she covers her mouth with her hand.
“Oh sorry sorry!” She holds out the other hand for me to shake “My name is Marie Grace. I've just gotten so used to people asking about my hair it was just a knee jerk. Sorry.”
She seems absolutely horrified with herself but so adorable I can't help but laugh. I can see why people questioned the hair, it hangs to her hips like a lions mane. She notices me looking.
“This town doesn't have many mixed people does it?”
Not really. Only the Dean family. Landen. No. Stop.
“Not really.” I admit “Most of the families here are old names, not many new faces so... Sorry are people being assholes because I can get them to stop-”
She laughs, it's a cute laugh but her smile is breathtaking. “It's fine. So Colin, what is there to do in Riverview?”
******************************
Her eyes are brown.
The first time i hold her hand I have to swallow the butterflies in my stomach. The first time we kiss all I can think about is the cherry taste of her lip gloss, my hands get tangled in her mane and i feel like hours are passing.
I don't feel guilty afterward. I don't try to hide my feelings.
I can go home at night and think of her lips while I'm alone and I don't feel dirty.
“Marie Grace” I let her name roll off my tongue and she giggles. Damn she's adorable. We're sitting in my bedroom binge watching her favorite show on Netflix; she's sitting on the floor in front of me while I play with her hair.
“If you're going to play with it, you might as well do something useful and pick up a comb and some grease.” She readjusts to fold her legs underneath her but keeps her eyes on the screen. I'm more focused on the curly mass in front of me than the show.
“Grease?”
“Yeah, grease. It's a think we do to keep our hair and scalp from drying out. Also it feels ah-mazing to have someone else do it.”
“Duley noted. Anyway Marie Grace Rider, what are your plans for after graduation?”
She leans back against the bed and looks up at me and winks.
“That, Colin Jones, is a great question.”
*************************************
Just a short little section because it didn't quite feel right to lump it with the last one and I'm not yet finished the next section. I'm thinking I'm going to do a few more of these and then, if you'd like, i might do one with Boe. i feel like he's another Dean whose story was glossed over and he could have some interesting stories to tell.
idk let me know.
It's 3 am......damn
FUN FACT! Marie Grace is the only character in this story that I completely made up. Every other character was an actual person in Riverview. Marie Grace is based off of a real person in terms of looks and behavior (what I know of her behavior) I met a girl at the mall once, a mixed girl, and her hair was glorious. It was big and curly and hung to her butt (below her butt really). It was also blonde with shots of brown and gold. This girl is who I've always wanted to look like and that's who i based Marie Grace off of :P
"Thanks Mr. Dean." I say and I make my way through the house to the back door. Sure enough Landen is out back throwing horseshoes at the pit. In the freezing cold. Typical Landen. He doesn't notice me at first so I stay silent and watch him. He's always been good at this game, and he does a little dance whenever he get's a few in a row. He's adorable.
"Hey." I say, I really don't know how I want to start this. He turns at the sound of my voice and smiles his beautiful smile, it breaks my heart.
"Colin. Hey I wasn't expecting you today!" He says making his way over to me. "Wanna play?"
I agree but only because I'm too nervous to say what I came here for. We play for a while and it feels just as if last night never happened. We joke, we laugh, we talk about random topics but I notice he doesn't try to flirt with me, and I avoid making gay jokes where normally these things are fair game. Before I realized it hours have passed. It's now or never.
"We need to talk."
He stops mid throw and turns to face me, his eyes look sad, but almost hopeful. He wants to be wrong. "I understand Colin, can i know why?"
I shrug. "I'm not gay." i barely whisper this, I can't tell if I'm lying or not.
Landens eyebrow raises "You didn't seem to care if you were gay when you kissed me."
Every time i think about that kiss my stomach does flips and I have to fight the urge to grab him again.
"Well i wasn't thinking clearly last night. I'm not gay and I don't think we should hangout anymore." There. I said it. I try not to look at his face because I know there will be tears in his eyes and if I see them I won't be able to stop myself.
"Bye Landen." That's all i say before going around the house to my car, I don't want to go through and face his family.
***********
I feel myself being pulled backwards; someone has a hold of my backpack.
“Hey!” It's a reasonable knee jerk reaction but my attacker lets go and I fall backwards into the lockers. It's Alissa Dean. I try to right myself but she grabs the front of my shirt with a balled fist.
“'Lis, I'm just trying to get to class.”
“Shut up.” She leans her face close to mine, up close I can see how much like her brother she actually looks and it's nauseating. “You ever come near my brother again and I will personally cut off your testicles and feed them to my horse.”
I swallow, unsure of what to say. “I-”
“No. No excuses Colin, you hurt him and honestly you're lucky I'm on school probation or I'd beat your ass right here.”
She's staring right into my eyes and it makes me need to look away but I'm afraid to. I think she'd punch me if I did. I want to tell her that I spent last night in tears, writing and re-writing texts that I never sent, dialing his number and never hitting call, I have at least 6 hand written letters balled up on my bedroom floor. I want to tell her that I'm sorry I take it all back and god she looks like her brother at the right angles. I swallow the lump in my throat and look her in the eyes, her brothers dark green eyes.
“Okay.” I think my voice cracks. She lets go of my shirt but holds me to the lockers for another moment while she looks me up and down. “Don't cross my path again scumbag.”
She storms off towards the main floor exit. Typical Alissa, she probably only showed up today to do this. I had noticed Landen isn't here.
I wait a moment and then head towards the exit myself. I can't do this, not today.
In the car I grip the steering wheel so tight I see my knuckles turn white but I don't care. Why is this happening? Why do I love him? Why couldn't it have been Alissa? She has the same face but I've never been lost in the green of her eyes, never caught my breath when she smiled, I've never once imagined that her lips could be as soft as Landens. Why does it have to be him?
*****************
I take Dusty Joy to the prom and have a great time. Landen and Alissa show up an hour late. Not that I'm looking for them.
The school year ends and the summer passes. Avery says I'm becoming withdrawn and anti-social but I don't think so. I spent plenty of time out of the house, it's just my friends don't get it. No one get's it. Not even Av'.
Senior year begins and there's a new girl at our school; Marie Grace Rider.
“Yes this is my real hair.” Is the first thing she says to me, I raise an eyebrow.
“Ummm...My name's Colin. I just wanted to say hi.”
Her eyes get wide and she covers her mouth with her hand.
“Oh sorry sorry!” She holds out the other hand for me to shake “My name is Marie Grace. I've just gotten so used to people asking about my hair it was just a knee jerk. Sorry.”
She seems absolutely horrified with herself but so adorable I can't help but laugh. I can see why people questioned the hair, it hangs to her hips like a lions mane. She notices me looking.
“This town doesn't have many mixed people does it?”
Not really. Only the Dean family. Landen. No. Stop.
“Not really.” I admit “Most of the families here are old names, not many new faces so... Sorry are people being assholes because I can get them to stop-”
She laughs, it's a cute laugh but her smile is breathtaking. “It's fine. So Colin, what is there to do in Riverview?”
******************************
Her eyes are brown.
The first time i hold her hand I have to swallow the butterflies in my stomach. The first time we kiss all I can think about is the cherry taste of her lip gloss, my hands get tangled in her mane and i feel like hours are passing.
I don't feel guilty afterward. I don't try to hide my feelings.
I can go home at night and think of her lips while I'm alone and I don't feel dirty.
“Marie Grace” I let her name roll off my tongue and she giggles. Damn she's adorable. We're sitting in my bedroom binge watching her favorite show on Netflix; she's sitting on the floor in front of me while I play with her hair.
“If you're going to play with it, you might as well do something useful and pick up a comb and some grease.” She readjusts to fold her legs underneath her but keeps her eyes on the screen. I'm more focused on the curly mass in front of me than the show.
“Grease?”
“Yeah, grease. It's a think we do to keep our hair and scalp from drying out. Also it feels ah-mazing to have someone else do it.”
“Duley noted. Anyway Marie Grace Rider, what are your plans for after graduation?”
She leans back against the bed and looks up at me and winks.
“That, Colin Jones, is a great question.”
*************************************
Just a short little section because it didn't quite feel right to lump it with the last one and I'm not yet finished the next section. I'm thinking I'm going to do a few more of these and then, if you'd like, i might do one with Boe. i feel like he's another Dean whose story was glossed over and he could have some interesting stories to tell.
idk let me know.
It's 3 am......damn
FUN FACT! Marie Grace is the only character in this story that I completely made up. Every other character was an actual person in Riverview. Marie Grace is based off of a real person in terms of looks and behavior (what I know of her behavior) I met a girl at the mall once, a mixed girl, and her hair was glorious. It was big and curly and hung to her butt (below her butt really). It was also blonde with shots of brown and gold. This girl is who I've always wanted to look like and that's who i based Marie Grace off of :P