I Don't Wanna Grow [9/?]
Title: I Don't Wanna Grow Up
Author: chemicalspidey
Pairing: Frank/Gerard
Rating: PG
Summary: AU Gerard is mentally incapable of looking after himself as he has the mind of a child. Frank is his best friend and carer. Gerard has no sense of right and wrong, and will literally do anything for Frank.
Disclaimer: All lies.
Warnings: Mental illness
Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7 Chapter 8
The envelope slipped from between Frank’s shaking fingers before he had time to react. He just stared at the nervous man in front of him in complete and utter shock.
Distantly he could hear his own voice echoing around the room. Harsh words slipped from his lips before he had the chance to stop them.
“No wonder your parents left you.”
Gerard sprung back, wounded, a small whimper escaping him. His wide eyes quickly filled with tears, Frank just watched as the fat droplets rolled down Gerard’s face and pooled above his lips.
Frank wished he could say something to make him stop, but he couldn’t find his voice, he couldn’t think clearly.
“Go to bed.”
His tone was sharper than he intended. Gerard didn’t leave, not at first anyway. Silence settled upon the dank room. Gerard stared at Frank for a few minutes, pleading with his eyes for Frank to say something, hug him, forgive him. Anything.
Frank turned away picking up the envelope once more.
He couldn’t believe it. The package contained almost seven thousand dollars.
Seven thousand stolen dollars.
He heard the bedroom door slam, shortly followed by a loud sob.
***
For what seemed like forever, Frank stood still in the centre of the room envelope in hand, listening to Gerard’s cries.
He was already regretting treating Gerard so cruelly. In his mind he knew that what Gerard had done was wrong - he had every right to be mad- and that he need to be shown it. But with everyone of Gerard’s sobs his chest to grew tighter. A fist seemed to close around his heart squeezing it and battling with his brain to let him go and comfort Gerard.
His mind won out though. Gerard had to be taught. It was the right thing to.
Frank knew where the money had come from- there was only one possible place.
He paced the room, his nervous energy preventing him from keeping still. He could hear Gerard sobbing from the bedroom and pressed his fingers to his temples. He couldn’t think over Gerard’s cries and the pounding of his head.
Brian would understand right? He was Frank’s friend, he’d understand. But what if he fired him? Then what would happen? There was no way he could take care of Gerard then, he was struggling as it was. These thoughts raced through his head as drummed his finger across the table nervously. He should own up, call Brian, explain what happened. Brian would be cool with it, he was sure he would, he liked Gerard.
Frank mentally abused himself for not punishing Gerard the day he stole the skittles, perhaps then he would have learned that stealing was wrong.
Reluctantly he picked up the phone and dialled Brian’s number.
***
There was silence from the other line after Frank explained what had happened to Brian and Frank could imagine him to be silently freaking out. In his mind he pictured him as a cartoon character, angry steam billowing from his ears.
However, when Brian finally spoke it was not angry words.
“You haven’t been to hard on him have you?” he said in an almost reprimanding tone.
“What?” Frank hissed, angry that Brian was questioning his treatment of Gerard.
“Just don’t be too harsh, he only does it to please you.”
Frank could feel his blood boiling. How could Brian lecture him? Brian didn’t know anything about Gerard. Whether Gerard had stolen the money for Frank or not, it was still wrong and Gerard had to be shown it.
“He needs to know he’s done wrong otherwise he’ll do it again,” murmured Frank through gritted teeth.
“I know, I know, It’s just the day he came to work with you, he told me a lot. He’s scared Frank, he’s scared that you’ll leave. He thinks it’s his fault his parents didn’t like him, he thinks he did something to make them unhappy. He scared he’s making you unhappy too. He doesn’t want to push you away.”
Frank heart sunk down to his stomach and a different kind of anger for Brian flooded through him. Gerard had never once discussed his feelings with Frank before, why did he confide in Brian so much? “because he doesn’t trust you,” thought Frank before he could stop the idea from forming.
“Frank?”
“Fuck off, Brian you don’t know what your talking about.”
“Frank-”
“-I’ll see you tomorrow, I’ll bring the money” He hung up.
**
It was the earlier hours of the morning when Frank finally decided to go to sleep. As the door creaked open, Gerard’s squeezed his eyes tightly shut. He could hear his heart pounding and wondered how he could make it stop- he didn’t want Frankie to hear it and know he was awake. He was scared that if Frankie knew found he wasn’t asleep he would shout at him some more. He hated Frankie being mad at him. He wanted to throw himself into Frankie’s arms and apologise for making him upset but in his gut he knew that it wouldn’t work this time, he would have to do something better to get Frankie to love him again.
He felt Frank’s warm body slip into the sheet beside him and waited for the arms to wrap around him from behind but they never came.
For the first time since he had been reunited with Frank, he cried himself to sleep.
A/N: I'm am so sorry for like disappearing for so long and not updating, feel free to hurt me. I've been drowning in coursework, revision and exams, plus all the emotional leaving school stuff. I don't know when I will be able to update next either, because I've got more exams and shizz but i'll try and make it quick. =(
Also, sorry if this chapter is crap, I think I kind of rushed it.
Thank you to everyone who has continued reading this despite the wait, I love you guys <3
Author: chemicalspidey
Pairing: Frank/Gerard
Rating: PG
Summary: AU Gerard is mentally incapable of looking after himself as he has the mind of a child. Frank is his best friend and carer. Gerard has no sense of right and wrong, and will literally do anything for Frank.
Disclaimer: All lies.
Warnings: Mental illness
Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7 Chapter 8
The envelope slipped from between Frank’s shaking fingers before he had time to react. He just stared at the nervous man in front of him in complete and utter shock.
Distantly he could hear his own voice echoing around the room. Harsh words slipped from his lips before he had the chance to stop them.
“No wonder your parents left you.”
Gerard sprung back, wounded, a small whimper escaping him. His wide eyes quickly filled with tears, Frank just watched as the fat droplets rolled down Gerard’s face and pooled above his lips.
Frank wished he could say something to make him stop, but he couldn’t find his voice, he couldn’t think clearly.
“Go to bed.”
His tone was sharper than he intended. Gerard didn’t leave, not at first anyway. Silence settled upon the dank room. Gerard stared at Frank for a few minutes, pleading with his eyes for Frank to say something, hug him, forgive him. Anything.
Frank turned away picking up the envelope once more.
He couldn’t believe it. The package contained almost seven thousand dollars.
Seven thousand stolen dollars.
He heard the bedroom door slam, shortly followed by a loud sob.
***
For what seemed like forever, Frank stood still in the centre of the room envelope in hand, listening to Gerard’s cries.
He was already regretting treating Gerard so cruelly. In his mind he knew that what Gerard had done was wrong - he had every right to be mad- and that he need to be shown it. But with everyone of Gerard’s sobs his chest to grew tighter. A fist seemed to close around his heart squeezing it and battling with his brain to let him go and comfort Gerard.
His mind won out though. Gerard had to be taught. It was the right thing to.
Frank knew where the money had come from- there was only one possible place.
He paced the room, his nervous energy preventing him from keeping still. He could hear Gerard sobbing from the bedroom and pressed his fingers to his temples. He couldn’t think over Gerard’s cries and the pounding of his head.
Brian would understand right? He was Frank’s friend, he’d understand. But what if he fired him? Then what would happen? There was no way he could take care of Gerard then, he was struggling as it was. These thoughts raced through his head as drummed his finger across the table nervously. He should own up, call Brian, explain what happened. Brian would be cool with it, he was sure he would, he liked Gerard.
Frank mentally abused himself for not punishing Gerard the day he stole the skittles, perhaps then he would have learned that stealing was wrong.
Reluctantly he picked up the phone and dialled Brian’s number.
***
There was silence from the other line after Frank explained what had happened to Brian and Frank could imagine him to be silently freaking out. In his mind he pictured him as a cartoon character, angry steam billowing from his ears.
However, when Brian finally spoke it was not angry words.
“You haven’t been to hard on him have you?” he said in an almost reprimanding tone.
“What?” Frank hissed, angry that Brian was questioning his treatment of Gerard.
“Just don’t be too harsh, he only does it to please you.”
Frank could feel his blood boiling. How could Brian lecture him? Brian didn’t know anything about Gerard. Whether Gerard had stolen the money for Frank or not, it was still wrong and Gerard had to be shown it.
“He needs to know he’s done wrong otherwise he’ll do it again,” murmured Frank through gritted teeth.
“I know, I know, It’s just the day he came to work with you, he told me a lot. He’s scared Frank, he’s scared that you’ll leave. He thinks it’s his fault his parents didn’t like him, he thinks he did something to make them unhappy. He scared he’s making you unhappy too. He doesn’t want to push you away.”
Frank heart sunk down to his stomach and a different kind of anger for Brian flooded through him. Gerard had never once discussed his feelings with Frank before, why did he confide in Brian so much? “because he doesn’t trust you,” thought Frank before he could stop the idea from forming.
“Frank?”
“Fuck off, Brian you don’t know what your talking about.”
“Frank-”
“-I’ll see you tomorrow, I’ll bring the money” He hung up.
**
It was the earlier hours of the morning when Frank finally decided to go to sleep. As the door creaked open, Gerard’s squeezed his eyes tightly shut. He could hear his heart pounding and wondered how he could make it stop- he didn’t want Frankie to hear it and know he was awake. He was scared that if Frankie knew found he wasn’t asleep he would shout at him some more. He hated Frankie being mad at him. He wanted to throw himself into Frankie’s arms and apologise for making him upset but in his gut he knew that it wouldn’t work this time, he would have to do something better to get Frankie to love him again.
He felt Frank’s warm body slip into the sheet beside him and waited for the arms to wrap around him from behind but they never came.
For the first time since he had been reunited with Frank, he cried himself to sleep.
A/N: I'm am so sorry for like disappearing for so long and not updating, feel free to hurt me. I've been drowning in coursework, revision and exams, plus all the emotional leaving school stuff. I don't know when I will be able to update next either, because I've got more exams and shizz but i'll try and make it quick. =(
Also, sorry if this chapter is crap, I think I kind of rushed it.
Thank you to everyone who has continued reading this despite the wait, I love you guys <3