An oldie but a goodie
The Mary Sue-icide Attempt... the plot twist we've come to know and love in the MCR fandom.
Title: [Bob]..could..you..put..this..to..my..head..?..[Bryar]-29 *sigh*
Author: TheBrokenBeatenFreak
Mary Sue: Bob Bryar and girlfriend Emma. No, rly.
Her story introduction: i would REALLY love you all if you didnt' throw things at me... or llamas for that matter!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Yes, hello ma'am... would you like some batshit with that crazy?
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Bob's P.O.V.
"Where is she?" I asked nobody. Well, this is off to a great start. Emma told me that she was just going for a walk. Maby lol she already went back to the house. I did a quick U-turn and headed back. Passing Bryan on the way. He said a walk i didn't think this far into town though. o well he's strange anyways. There were so many things wrong with the past few sentences that it makes my head spin. I pulled into the driveway debateing weather *applauds* Her spelling skills are truly worthy of an MCR badfic or not to drive back into town and look again for her. Then again I dont' think she even left the house when she told me that she was going. This has been the most useful opening paragraph ever. I got out of the car and numbley Are you serious? Numbly walked back in? walked back in. I looked in the kitchen, theliving room, I asked Frank, Mikey, Gerard, May, and Ray OKAY. Now, I've seen the guys' names spelled many different ways... but MAY? WTF? none of them had seen her. I started to panic at this point. Thoughts raced threw Okay... my head what if she had been kidnaped, or killed, or.... I shook my head and walked into the upstairs hallway. I was going to cry soon. Of course. I could hear Iron Maiden Oh fanfic!Gerard, why do you only listen to Iron Maiden and the Misfits? comming from one room. and video games from the other. And something fall from Emma's room. I knocked at the door.
"Emma." I said "Emma." I checked the door. Unlocked. Oh. My. God. I opend I'm just gonna try and pretend that was a typo. the door and didn't see her right away. My eyes saw the blade and the red first. My heart dropped to my feet. She was just lying there. She was shakeing. I dropped to my knees next to her. She was breathing but shalowly. MCR fics have really numbed my reaction to suicide attempts in fiction. I shook her.
"Emma." Her eyes were just cracked open. "i'm sorry." she mummbled. Her eyes shut completely.
"EMMA ELIZA CUTS!" (sorry I had to) I said louder. Her breathing was still there and her pulse was too.But her wrist was bleeding heavely.I quickly ran into the hallway and went to the door next to the bathroom. I took a towel out just as Bryan walked out.
"Bob?" He asked.
Tears were now staining my face. OKAY, this is another maddening MCR badfic staple. Seriously, how the fuck do tears stain someone's face? >:(
"Get the car started." I said. 911 would take forever to call an ambulance to get here. Sure, I'll buy that. Not.
Bryan followed me back in to Emma's room. I put the towel over her wrist and applyed as much pressure as I could.
Bryan ran to get the car. "RAY! RAY!" I yelled.Iron Maiden stoped. Oh, so it wasn't Gerard. Whatever.
"I need Help!" I called. He came running into Emma's room. His eyes grew wide and exclaimed, "Dude, this is the worst plot twist ever!"
He helped me pick her up with out taking the pressure off her wrist.
I carried her out to the car. Ray sat in the front with Bryan while I held Emma in the back.
"What happend?" Ray asked turning around.
"I dont' know." I said my tears now falling on Emma. Eww.
"I don't know."
We pulled up to the front of the hospitle HAHA, HOSPITLE I carried Emma in PERIOD OR SEMI-COLON Ray followed me and Bryan parked the car.
"Is it an emergency sir."
"LOOK MY GIRLFRIENDS WRIST IS BLEEDING DOES THAT SOUND LIKE AN EMERGENCY TO YOU?!"
"Calm down sir. Not really."
I saw a gurny being wheeled down the hallway. I put her on the thing and they took her away. He put her on the thing. Oh, good.
"You have to stay up here sir." This man in a white jacket said. Try doctor or nurse.
I walked back into the waiting room where Bryan and Ray were seated.I felt numb. Again. The blood on my shirt scarred me what the fuck?, and the blood on my hands made me feel like a murderer. I caused this. I could have done something. Deep.
"I'm going to go and call them and tell them where we are." Bryan by the way, is this supposed to be Brian Schecter? Spell it right! said getting up.
I nodded my head. Ray got up and sat next to me.
"I know what you are thinking." He said, purposely omitting a period at the end of his sentence to piss me off
"No you don't." I said, doing the same
"Yes, you are blaming yourself." He said right back.
"Because it is my fault." I said
"How?" He asked.
"I knew she was depressed, and upset over something that I feel like I could have helped with. I should have told her to stay with me when she said she was going for a walk and walked upstairs instead. Maybe I just didn't want to be a possessive weirdo who doesn't let his girlfriend do anything by herself."
"You didn't know she was going to do this man." He said putting a hand on my sholder.
"Why was she upset?" He asked. And those two sentences were separated... why?
"I can't tell you I promised I wouldn't tell anyone." I said
"ohh." He said It all makes sense now.
"But it made memmories come back she said." I looked at Ray.
"Derik?" He asked
"No."
"Ohh. That." He knew she had been attacked but I dont' know how he found out. I wasn't going to ask. Wow, this is an in-depth conversation.
"Bob you couldn't prevent the memmories. Or what ever made her upset." He said
"I know. But I could have stoped her from doing this." I said. Looking at my hands. Thinking. It was probably. Because of. How much my grammar. Sucks.
"I told them we were at the hospitle I didn't tell them why Frank hung up the phone too early after he said they were on there way. Jesus christ, ever heard of a period? I nodded my head. Going silent again. ...?
"Ray."
"Hum hallelujah." He said.
"Tell me she's going to be okay (I promise)." I said
"Bob. I can't promise (she's nooot ookaaayyy). But I know and feel like she is." Oh, that was reassuring. He said putting his hand back on my sholder.
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Wooooow.
Title: [Bob]..could..you..put..this..to..my..head..?..[Bryar]-29 *sigh*
Author: TheBrokenBeatenFreak
Mary Sue: Bob Bryar and girlfriend Emma. No, rly.
Her story introduction: i would REALLY love you all if you didnt' throw things at me... or llamas for that matter!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Yes, hello ma'am... would you like some batshit with that crazy?
---------------------------------------
Bob's P.O.V.
"Where is she?" I asked nobody. Well, this is off to a great start. Emma told me that she was just going for a walk. Maby lol she already went back to the house. I did a quick U-turn and headed back. Passing Bryan on the way. He said a walk i didn't think this far into town though. o well he's strange anyways. There were so many things wrong with the past few sentences that it makes my head spin. I pulled into the driveway debateing weather *applauds* Her spelling skills are truly worthy of an MCR badfic or not to drive back into town and look again for her. Then again I dont' think she even left the house when she told me that she was going. This has been the most useful opening paragraph ever. I got out of the car and numbley Are you serious? Numbly walked back in? walked back in. I looked in the kitchen, theliving room, I asked Frank, Mikey, Gerard, May, and Ray OKAY. Now, I've seen the guys' names spelled many different ways... but MAY? WTF? none of them had seen her. I started to panic at this point. Thoughts raced threw Okay... my head what if she had been kidnaped, or killed, or.... I shook my head and walked into the upstairs hallway. I was going to cry soon. Of course. I could hear Iron Maiden Oh fanfic!Gerard, why do you only listen to Iron Maiden and the Misfits? comming from one room. and video games from the other. And something fall from Emma's room. I knocked at the door.
"Emma." I said "Emma." I checked the door. Unlocked. Oh. My. God. I opend I'm just gonna try and pretend that was a typo. the door and didn't see her right away. My eyes saw the blade and the red first. My heart dropped to my feet. She was just lying there. She was shakeing. I dropped to my knees next to her. She was breathing but shalowly. MCR fics have really numbed my reaction to suicide attempts in fiction. I shook her.
"Emma." Her eyes were just cracked open. "i'm sorry." she mummbled. Her eyes shut completely.
"EMMA ELIZA CUTS!" (sorry I had to) I said louder. Her breathing was still there and her pulse was too.But her wrist was bleeding heavely.I quickly ran into the hallway and went to the door next to the bathroom. I took a towel out just as Bryan walked out.
"Bob?" He asked.
Tears were now staining my face. OKAY, this is another maddening MCR badfic staple. Seriously, how the fuck do tears stain someone's face? >:(
"Get the car started." I said. 911 would take forever to call an ambulance to get here. Sure, I'll buy that. Not.
Bryan followed me back in to Emma's room. I put the towel over her wrist and applyed as much pressure as I could.
Bryan ran to get the car. "RAY! RAY!" I yelled.Iron Maiden stoped. Oh, so it wasn't Gerard. Whatever.
"I need Help!" I called. He came running into Emma's room. His eyes grew wide and exclaimed, "Dude, this is the worst plot twist ever!"
He helped me pick her up with out taking the pressure off her wrist.
I carried her out to the car. Ray sat in the front with Bryan while I held Emma in the back.
"What happend?" Ray asked turning around.
"I dont' know." I said my tears now falling on Emma. Eww.
"I don't know."
We pulled up to the front of the hospitle HAHA, HOSPITLE I carried Emma in PERIOD OR SEMI-COLON Ray followed me and Bryan parked the car.
"Is it an emergency sir."
"LOOK MY GIRLFRIENDS WRIST IS BLEEDING DOES THAT SOUND LIKE AN EMERGENCY TO YOU?!"
"Calm down sir. Not really."
I saw a gurny being wheeled down the hallway. I put her on the thing and they took her away. He put her on the thing. Oh, good.
"You have to stay up here sir." This man in a white jacket said. Try doctor or nurse.
I walked back into the waiting room where Bryan and Ray were seated.I felt numb. Again. The blood on my shirt scarred me what the fuck?, and the blood on my hands made me feel like a murderer. I caused this. I could have done something. Deep.
"I'm going to go and call them and tell them where we are." Bryan by the way, is this supposed to be Brian Schecter? Spell it right! said getting up.
I nodded my head. Ray got up and sat next to me.
"I know what you are thinking." He said, purposely omitting a period at the end of his sentence to piss me off
"No you don't." I said, doing the same
"Yes, you are blaming yourself." He said right back.
"Because it is my fault." I said
"How?" He asked.
"I knew she was depressed, and upset over something that I feel like I could have helped with. I should have told her to stay with me when she said she was going for a walk and walked upstairs instead. Maybe I just didn't want to be a possessive weirdo who doesn't let his girlfriend do anything by herself."
"You didn't know she was going to do this man." He said putting a hand on my sholder.
"Why was she upset?" He asked. And those two sentences were separated... why?
"I can't tell you I promised I wouldn't tell anyone." I said
"ohh." He said It all makes sense now.
"But it made memmories come back she said." I looked at Ray.
"Derik?" He asked
"No."
"Ohh. That." He knew she had been attacked but I dont' know how he found out. I wasn't going to ask. Wow, this is an in-depth conversation.
"Bob you couldn't prevent the memmories. Or what ever made her upset." He said
"I know. But I could have stoped her from doing this." I said. Looking at my hands. Thinking. It was probably. Because of. How much my grammar. Sucks.
"I told them we were at the hospitle I didn't tell them why Frank hung up the phone too early after he said they were on there way. Jesus christ, ever heard of a period? I nodded my head. Going silent again. ...?
"Ray."
"Hum hallelujah." He said.
"Tell me she's going to be okay (I promise)." I said
"Bob. I can't promise (she's nooot ookaaayyy). But I know and feel like she is." Oh, that was reassuring. He said putting his hand back on my sholder.
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Wooooow.