(no subject)
Andy/Donny/Andrew/Wataresistant and I broke up recently.
I fucked up. I didn't tell him everything. Most of what I did tell him was a lie.
I deserve nothing but pain, and that's what I'm getting. He wants to stay friends, and I'm... able to exist that way. I'm not happy. Not at all. I miss him dearly. I can't even feel his aura anymore... It's cold in my soul now.
I think I thought a thought about killing myself, but I don't know what I'm thinkinng half the time anymore. I'm so lost, so dead, so... damaged by this mistake that I can't feel myself anymore. I don't want to hurt, and even if I repress that feeling, I still feel cold and empty.
To put it simply, children, I want him back, I want him now, and Gods save me if I don't get over him soon...
I'm proud of myself, though... I haven't cut over this yet, and I plan on keeping it that way. My blood won't bring him back.
I fucked up. I didn't tell him everything. Most of what I did tell him was a lie.
I deserve nothing but pain, and that's what I'm getting. He wants to stay friends, and I'm... able to exist that way. I'm not happy. Not at all. I miss him dearly. I can't even feel his aura anymore... It's cold in my soul now.
I think I thought a thought about killing myself, but I don't know what I'm thinkinng half the time anymore. I'm so lost, so dead, so... damaged by this mistake that I can't feel myself anymore. I don't want to hurt, and even if I repress that feeling, I still feel cold and empty.
To put it simply, children, I want him back, I want him now, and Gods save me if I don't get over him soon...
I'm proud of myself, though... I haven't cut over this yet, and I plan on keeping it that way. My blood won't bring him back.