lalala...

[cheltie]

well... went to practice again today, just learned military which wasnt that bad so thats good... went over pom again, i have that memorized soo thats good too... came home then went out to dinner with my dad... omgsh i was getting so sad, ive been really sad lately and its over a really silly reason, i MISS my brothers! they are like 7 and 11 and im about to die because i cant see them... i always see cindy with her lil brother and caity with hers... and every time i just want to start crying :( (mine live in houston with my ex-step-mom... she has something against my mother so she wont let me take them for a weekend or anything) every time i talk to her she makes all these conditions that i have to go see my biological father (hmm havent seen him in 6 years...) or makes up stupid butt excuses like her parents are visiting and the boys havent seen them since june... HA I HAVENT SEEN THEM SINCE LAST DECEMBER LADY!! im sorry but that lady is really pissing me off... shes like sided with my stepdad in this whole thing... (i know confusing but if you know me you should be able to follow along) so at dinner i brought that up and almost starting crying again.. how silly can i get?! but yah and rather cleverly (if i do say so myself...) brought up the fact that if i had a CAR i could just drive down there myself whenever i wanted to without bothering anybody... *snicker* then wiped my sad lil tear away haha i wasnt faking though i really do miss them... WES IS GOING TO BE IN MIDDLE SCHOOL!!! i feel so old... haha guys i know yall hate your lil siblings but really your lucky cuz at least you get to love them and show them that, appreciate it... cuz i would kill to be able to see my little brothers on a regular basis... (and no that doesnt mean annually...) i dont get to do any of the big sister stuff that im supposed to do... and it makes me feel so very empty :(

well enough of that or im gonna start crying again so have a great day yall!!

-chelsea-