Yeah, I'm still alive
A few things have happened in the last few weeks.
First, two weeks ago, Bill and I got into an argument. He (in not so many words) said I wasn't good enough for him. I wasn't strong enough... wasn't independent enough.... and that I had a 50/50 chance of getting him back.
After that, I came to a realization. Since I've asked him if we could try again, he's treated me like crap. He's told me numerous times that I need to exercise (which means I'm too fat), told me numerous times that I need to go out (like him? and sit at a bar drinking?), and acts like he's bored out of his mind when we did go out. I mean it. If we went to a restaurant that had a tv (most do now) he'd watch tv. I would talk to him and get one syllable replies. He refused to hold my hand. And, I just found out that he was still seeing his whoring girlfriend a month ago.... AFTER he told me he broke up with her and wanted to see where he and I go.
I don't need that crap. He told me he wanted to help me, but he's done the opposite. You know, it's a real eye opener when his own sister tells me I can do better than him. And everyone I've talked to has told me how wrong he is. I am strong. I am independant. He's an ass.
I know you all told me not to, but I have. I've been talking to Jason. Actually, it has helped both of us to feel better. We both finally got a chance to ask forgiveness from each other. We were both equally to blame for the mess we created. And besides... for now I'm safe. He's not living with T. Talking things out with him has helped in my therapy. And my therapist agreed.
So right now, I'm just taking care of myself, and doing the things I want to do. I haven't talked to Bill in two weeks, and really don't have a desire to. I deserve to be treated better than that.
First, two weeks ago, Bill and I got into an argument. He (in not so many words) said I wasn't good enough for him. I wasn't strong enough... wasn't independent enough.... and that I had a 50/50 chance of getting him back.
After that, I came to a realization. Since I've asked him if we could try again, he's treated me like crap. He's told me numerous times that I need to exercise (which means I'm too fat), told me numerous times that I need to go out (like him? and sit at a bar drinking?), and acts like he's bored out of his mind when we did go out. I mean it. If we went to a restaurant that had a tv (most do now) he'd watch tv. I would talk to him and get one syllable replies. He refused to hold my hand. And, I just found out that he was still seeing his whoring girlfriend a month ago.... AFTER he told me he broke up with her and wanted to see where he and I go.
I don't need that crap. He told me he wanted to help me, but he's done the opposite. You know, it's a real eye opener when his own sister tells me I can do better than him. And everyone I've talked to has told me how wrong he is. I am strong. I am independant. He's an ass.
I know you all told me not to, but I have. I've been talking to Jason. Actually, it has helped both of us to feel better. We both finally got a chance to ask forgiveness from each other. We were both equally to blame for the mess we created. And besides... for now I'm safe. He's not living with T. Talking things out with him has helped in my therapy. And my therapist agreed.
So right now, I'm just taking care of myself, and doing the things I want to do. I haven't talked to Bill in two weeks, and really don't have a desire to. I deserve to be treated better than that.