Feb 13, 2008 23:57
My mother always said that if I didn't have anything nice to say, I shouldn't say anything at all. Most of my life I've ignored that piece of advice in favour of just letting whatever popped into my head fly right out of my mouth and thwack whomever happened to be in the way in the head... sometimes repeatedly.
But lately... I don't know. It just appears to take too much effort to say things, does not appear to really matter if I say anything or not. Those who should listen don't or do and flip out and make me the bad guy... and those that don't need to listen hear every word and somehow make it all about them and then I'm the bad guy.
Hmm... I see a pattern!
So lately I've just been absent. It's not one person... it's not one problem...
It is several things that have my attention, my mind and my heart tangled in super fun knots.
Nothing that can be done about it but I feel it's just best that I try to keep quiet, less risk of sticking my foot in my mouth and then having to expend even more effort to fix whatever drama comes from it.
I'll just go about my business... taking care of my little ones, playing WoW and doing what I can and what needs to be done.
It is not that I am really ignoring everyone for the sake of ignoring them. It's just that I'm not really paying too much attention in general.
I do miss having some of the lovely conversations that I've had in the past with some of the great people that I adore. But some of those people I just cannot be around right now and others... well they might have lives that touch some of those people I do not need to keep close contact with at the moment. And then the rest are just sadly caught in the cross-fire.
Not really sure why I'm even writing this. I guess I just wanted to let those people that do give a damn know that I'm still here.. and even if I'm not completely paying attention I do wish them well and hope that I've not missed anything majorly important that I should know about.
Hopefully by getting this out of my brain I can now go back to bed and actually sleep rather than lay there and be unable to shut my brain off and go to sleep.