SPN: Mistakes We Make 18
Summary: All-human AU. From the ages of 10 - 15, Dean and Castiel were inseparable. Then Dean's dad died, and rather than lose his brother to CPS, Dean took him and ran. Years later, Castiel's big brother Gabriel finds Dean working as a prostitute, and decides to try and help him - but does Dean want to be saved?
A/N: Now to deal with the fallout from last chapter in-story. Cas comforts Gabriel, then catches up with Dean.
Warnings: Aftermath of sexual assault, consensual couch-sex, violence, rough consensual wall-sex. Pretty heavy on the smut in this one.
-MWM-
Castiel was worried.
Gabriel had come home much earlier than expected, obviously upset about something. Cas had tried to cheer him up with a welcome-home blowjob, only to have Gabriel push him away and run to the bathroom. When the sound of retching soon followed, Castiel tried to go in and help, only to find the door was locked. That hadn't happened since the first month they'd lived together, and Cas nearly beat the door down in his sudden terror and need to get to his brother.
When Gabriel finally came back out, it was easy to see that he'd been crying. Again Cas tried to ask what was wrong, only to have Gabriel shake his head.
They were now sitting on the couch, usual positions reversed. Cas was sitting sideways against the arm of the couch, Gabriel sitting between his legs, curled into Castiel's chest. Cas was carding a hand through Gabriel's hair and humming something, trying to calm the older man. They'd been like this for the last hour, and Gabriel still hadn't spoken a word since coming home.
"Cas?" Gabriel finally broke the silence, and Castiel would have kissed him if he'd thought it wouldn't set off another panic attack.
"Hmm?" He hummed instead.
"I love you. You know that, right?"
"Of course. You tell me at least once a day. More if we have sex."
Gabriel flinched at that, almost imperceptibly. Cas thought that if he hadn't been pressed right against his brother, he probably wouldn't have noticed.
"Gabe, what's this about?"
"I… did I hurt you? Did I force you into this?"
"Into what?" Cas was genuinely confused by how Gabriel's mind was working at the moment.
"Into this… us. Relationship. Whatever we're calling it."
"Is your memory broken?" Cas huffed out a laugh. "I practically jumped you. There was no reluctance on my part. Promise."
"But you were so young," Gabriel was still whispering, as though it hurt to talk too loud. "Are you sure you knew what you wanted? Is this still what you want?"
"Gabe, stop," Cas was feeling scared again. The thought that maybe Gabriel was trying to break up with him filled him with terror, but also determination. No way was he letting his brother get out of this without a damn good reason. "You remember what I was like back then, right? Constantly strung out on drugs, drinking anything put in front of me, willing to have sex with anything that had a pulse."
"Exactly," Gabriel started. "I took advantage-"
"I wasn't finished," Cas gently admonished, tightening his hold for a moment. "Look at me then, and look at me now, with your influence. I haven't taken anything stronger than aspirin in four years. I haven't been drunk in longer. And while I enjoy having sex with you, I also enjoy simply spending time together, and I'm not trying to get laid by anyone else. You're good for me."
Gabriel lifted his head then, eyes pleading, and Cas gladly leaned forwards and kissed him, keeping it soft and gentle, not trying to go further.
"Now what brought this on?" Castiel whispered, nuzzling Gabriel's hair. It was unusual for Gabriel to feel insecure about them being together - he was the sort of man to take anything in his stride usually.
"I…" Gabriel was suddenly burying his face in Castiel's chest again, shoulders shaking.
"Something happened when you went out, didn't it?" Cas asked, somewhat redundantly. "What was it? Who upset you?"
Gabriel shook his head, and felt as tears started falling again. He hated feeling like this, feeling weak, but after what had happened… he'd fled the brothel, pausing just long enough to put his clothes back on and make sure his wallet was still there. He'd sent Kali a text from the bus station, saying that there was an emergency and he'd had to return home, and caught the first bus back. It probably would have been quicker to wait for Kali and get her to drive back with him - she tended to ignore unimportant things such as speed limits - but he couldn't face her right now. Couldn't face anyone. He didn't particularly want Cas to see him like this either, but Castiel made him feel safe.
"Gabe, please. Talk to me. I want to help."
Gabriel clutched tighter at the shirt beneath his face, trying to control his breathing. He couldn't tell Cas about what Dean had done, couldn't admit that he'd climaxed at Dean's rough treatment.
"Please. I love you. Let me in."
"Dean," Gabriel whispered finally. "I found Dean."
"What?" Castiel blinked, not having expected that. "Where? Is he okay? What-"
"He was working at the brothel," Gabriel continued quietly, forcing Castiel to be quiet and hear him out. "He's a prostitute. He… he saw the collar."
"…oh." Cas tightened his grip on Gabriel. That could explain the way Gabriel had been thinking earlier. "He got mad at you?"
Gabriel choked on a laugh. Got mad? That was an understatement if he'd ever heard one.
"He was furious," Gabriel closed his eyes, unable to look Cas in the face. "The things he said… he was so angry. He thought we abandoned him, when we didn't call. Said he needed us, and we were too busy screwing each other to help."
"He said what?" Castiel's voice had dropped into the dangerous level, and Gabriel started shaking. He'd never been afraid of Cas before, but couldn't help himself. Castiel was holding him tightly, a soft growl coming from his throat.
Noticing how scared Gabriel had suddenly become, Cas tried to calm down and comfort him. It wasn't working, he was filled with too many different emotions. He'd wondered what had happened to his first real friend for years, to find out that he was now working as a prostitute and had hurt Gabriel with his anger…
"I'll go to him," Castiel spoke after a few minutes. "I'll explain-"
"NO!" Gabriel shouted then, clinging to Castiel. "No, don't, please. Don't go to him, he's too angry. The things he said… please, he'll blame you too." Gabriel was filled with terror at the idea of Dean getting his hands on Castiel. He was barely holding himself together, he couldn't deal with it if Cas was hurt too.
"Hey, shhhh, it's okay," Cas was stroking his hair again, trying to soothe him. "It's okay. If it's that important, I won't go to him yet. We'll wait a while. Maybe if we call him in a few weeks, he might be able to speak to us."
Gabriel was trembling, shaking his head, and Castiel was at a loss as to what to do. So he fell back on a tried and proven method, tilting Gabriel's head back a little to kiss him. Gabriel froze for a moment, then slowly started to relax as Castiel didn't press for more.
They kissed for several minutes, before Gabriel shifted for a better angle. Now they were lying chest-to-chest, and Castiel was getting seriously turned on by the gentle, submissive behaviour Gabriel was displaying. He tried not to pressure Gabriel, but it was obvious when his older brother noticed his arousal.
Gabriel froze again, pulling away slightly and breathing hard. He knew Castiel wouldn't hurt him, knew that he was safe in his apartment, but a large part of him wanted to run away.
"Gabe, I know you're scared," Castiel leaned forwards and kissed Gabriel's cheek. "I don't know why, and I'm not sure how to make things better. Just tell me what you want me to do. Promise, I'll follow any instructions. Even if you just want to lie here and watch a movie. I want you to be happy. Let me make you happy?"
Gabriel looked down at Cas, at the bright blue eyes that had haunted his fantasies for over a decade. He reached up and gently traced a hand over Castiel's features, running his thumb across lips that were so good at both comforting him and winding him up. Castiel kept still, his arms loosely wrapped around Gabriel's waist, letting his brother regain his composure.
"I want…" he swallowed hard, then rocked his hips forwards, willing himself erect. It didn't take much effort with Castiel willing and eager beneath him. "I want you. Here, like this."
"Okay," Castiel was smiling up at him, rubbing his back and shifting his own hips to meet Gabriel's rocking thrusts. "It's been a while since we tried it here. Shall I fetch-"
"No," Gabriel immediately stopped and clung to Castiel tighter. "No, don't go."
"Hey, Gabe, it's okay," Castiel whispered into his ear, kissing it gently. "I'm not leaving, I promise. Just thought we might want some lube. It's okay."
"I'm sorry," Gabriel whispered, making Castiel shake his head.
"No, stop that. I'll be fine, just let me find…" He trailed off as he reached one hand around the side of the couch, fumbling for his backpack. He was fairly certain that he had something in there that would do. "Aha! Gotcha. Salad dressing that was too oily. It'll do."
"Cas-"
"Gabriel, shut up and fuck me."
At that, Gabriel finally let out a small smile, which Castiel counted as a major victory. They made quick work of their clothes, making sure not to stray too far from each other, then lay back down. Castiel had always been rather flexible, which Gabriel loved to test at any opportunity, and it allowed them to have sex while facing each other more easily than was usual.
Gabriel took his time preparing Castiel, more thorough than he usually was, and Cas was a panting, quivering mess beneath him by the time Gabriel decided that he was stretched enough. The impromptu lube was slightly unpleasant, but it did the job, and soon Gabriel had set a steady, gentle pace. Castiel whined in the back of his throat, used to things being a little rougher between them, and managed to wrap his legs around Gabriel's upper chest.
Gabriel, however, was determined to keep things gentle. He captured one of Castiel's hands and entwined their fingers together as they made love, knowing that it was hopelessly sappy and not caring in the slightest. He was trying to atone for every mark he'd ever left on his brother, whether it had been enjoyed or not. Realising that he was crying again, Gabriel buried his face in the side of Castiel's neck, and prayed for the first time in years. He prayed that he hadn't ruined Castiel, that he would be forgiven for loving his little brother, that he was doing the right thing in trying to keep Castiel away from Dean. Gabriel knew that it was screwed up, praying whilst balls-deep in Castiel, but he didn't care right then. He just needed this.
Reaching between them, he stroked Castiel gently but firmly, moving his hand in the way he'd learned was perfect for getting Cas off. Soon enough, Castiel was clenching around him, whispering Gabriel's name as he came over his hand. A few thrusts later and Gabriel was following him, sobbing his release, telling Cas he loved him over and over again.
They lay together for several minutes, before Cas shifted to lower his legs. Gabriel nuzzled his neck one last time, then stood up and tugged Castiel into the bathroom. He did most of the work of cleaning them up, even when Castiel tried to help, then the pair retreated to the bedroom and curled up together. Gabriel felt sleep claim him quite quickly, exhausted as he was from the emotional toll the last twenty four hours had taken on him.
Castiel, however, stayed awake. He ran his hand through Gabriel's hair, thinking hard. Ever since going clean, he'd been a little paranoid, though his thought processes were much clearer. Most people still considered him weird, but he didn't care. He often had insights and viewpoints that other people didn't even consider, and right now he knew that there was more to Gabriel's little meltdown than harsh words from someone they used to care about.
Something had happened between Gabriel and Dean, and Castiel needed to find out what it was. He'd keep his promise and not search Dean out immediately - Gabriel needed him right now - but as soon as he had a couple of days free, he was going to hunt down his old friend to have a few words with him.
No one hurt Castiel's big brother and got away with it, not even Dean.
-MWM-
It was a couple of weeks later, and Dean was trying to forget what he'd done to Gabriel. He was drinking whenever he wasn't working, and if it weren't for the little blue pills he probably wouldn't be able to work. Danni had tried to talk to him, only to have the door shut in her face. Dean wasn't talking to anyone, for any reason, not even Crowley. Everyone was worried about him.
So when a young man with bright blue eyes showed up at the Red Moon House looking for Dean, saying that he'd been friends with him as children and had finally found him, the girl working reception decided to take a chance and gave him Dean's address. No one else was getting through to him, it was time for drastic measures.
Castiel smiled thinly as he jogged the steps to Dean's apartment. From little hints he'd managed to pry out of Gabriel, he'd figured out that he and Dean had had sex, and it was during this that Dean had found out about Gabe and Castiel's relationship. That damn collar… he'd thought it was such a good idea at the time, had needed to show Gabriel who he belonged to. He'd never realised that it could cause so much trouble.
He wasn't mad about Gabriel having sex with Dean - Gabe had insisted that he hadn't recognised him at first, and Cas had told him to sleep with a male. Castiel was furious that Dean had done something to hurt Gabriel though. Whatever he'd said had shaken Gabriel so badly that he still had trouble touching Cas.
Finally reaching the right door, Castiel knocked and waited. He could hear someone stumbling around inside, and what sounded like bottles being knocked over. His insides clenched as the thirst came back for a moment, before he focused on his rage instead.
The door swung open, and Castiel's breath caught in his throat. This was Dean, no doubt about it. He was taller, sure, more muscled, but his face hadn't changed that drastically. And he was wearing the same lost, hurt expression that he'd had the first time they'd met.
"Cas…" Dean whispered, apparently recognising him as well. At least that would mean he'd know why Castiel was here.
"Dean," Castiel growled, before punching him in the gut. He was a little surprised at how much muscle his fist connected with, but not as surprised as Dean was. Hunched over a little, he was now at the perfect height for Castiel to punch him in the jaw. So he did.
"Cas, what the fuck?"
"You bastard," Castiel pushed him back, following him into the apartment and slamming the door shut. "You think you're the only one fucked over by life? Newsflash: We're all fate's bitches!"
Dean swung back at him then, and the two were suddenly brawling as they never had before. Cas shoved Dean so that he fell over the coffee table, breaking it in two, only to jump back as a foot lashed out at knee-height. Dean was up again the next second, tackling him and knocking the wind out of him.
Cas brought his elbow down on the back of Dean's neck, making him let go, then jumped at him again. This time Dean caught him in mid-air and pushed him against the wall, pinning him there with their bodies flush against each other.
The two fell still, panting, anger and disappointment, regrets and apologies hovering unspoken in the air between them as they stared into each other's eyes.
"Castiel," Dean whispered again, and it was so familiar that Cas couldn't help himself. He lunged forwards again, this time to capture Dean's lips with his own. Dean apparently had no problem with this, and instead used one hand to angle Castiel's head better while the other slipped inside Cas' pants to caress his arse.
Dean was felt as though the last ten years just melted away. He had Castiel back in his arms, they were kissing as though they never needed to breathe, and they were rutting together like the horny teenagers they had been.
Without pausing to think things through, Dean suddenly leaned back and peeled his t-shirt off. Castiel blinked for a moment, then grinned and followed suit. He fell to his knees then, undoing Dean's belt and fly, remembering this as though it had been yesterday that they'd been thrusting together into Cas' hand.
"Cas…" Dean groaned as he threaded his hands through Castiel's hair and tugged him forwards. They both had more experience now, and Cas was working his dick like an expert. Knowing what he really wanted, dean leant forwards and tugged Castiel's hips up so that he was now on all fours, and sucked on his own fingers before sliding his hand back into Cas' pants and finding his arsehole.
Cas moaned around him as Dean worked his finger inside of him, the way not helped much by the saliva, but neither of them cared. They'd waited too long for this to be put off by a lack of supplies.
Soon, Castiel undid his own pants and shimmied out of them, allowing Dean easier access. Dean took full advantage of this, and continued to stretch him open, listening to the way Cas hummed and groaned as he moved his fingers. His memory hadn't been lying - Cas' mouth was still magical, and he still ignored his gag reflex like a pro.
Dean, stop this-
Dean blinked as his mind threw echoes of Gabriel's pleading at him, then tried to ignore it. He had three fingers working in and out of Castiel now, and the smaller man was sucking him eagerly. Feeling that he was now loose enough, Dean pulled away and tugged Castiel roughly to his feet. He then shoved him against the wall again, and Castiel grinned at him, reaching out his arms.
Lifting Castiel wasn't difficult. For a moment it was difficult to find the right angle to slide into him, but then Cas reached down and guided him in. The two let out simultaneous groans as gravity helped to pull Castiel until Dean was firmly seated inside him. Cas wrapped his arms and legs around Dean then, and they started moving together.
Please, you're hurting me.
Dean continued to ignore the sounds of Gabriel's distress in his mind. Castiel was arching against him, a steady litany of 'more, harder, please' falling from his lips, and Dean was only too happy to oblige. He knew that he was being rough, thrusting hard into his childhood friend, but Castiel's cries of pleasure kept coming.
It was better than anything he'd imagined. Castiel was responsive to his touches, clenching his inner muscles to stimulate him, and quite vocal about what he wanted. Apparently, what he wanted was simply Dean.
Please Dean, stop this!
Dean growled at the memory, then latched onto Castiel's neck, biting down and sucking hard as he increased the rhythm of his thrusts. This simply drew a louder moan from Cas, and before he realised it, they were both climaxing, kissing sloppily in an effort to keep from shouting.
When he felt he could trust his legs again, Castiel unwrapped them and wriggled a little, causing Dean to slid out of him and lower him back to the ground. Both men were still breathing hard, and then Dean was kissing him again, over and over, hands roaming his skin again. Castiel couldn't help but respond, wanting to just stay in this moment forever.
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