Going Deeper
So I got asked what I meant when I said that just because I desire to be someone's helpmate does not mean that God has a husband planned for me. It gets into some deep theology, so I thought I'd make it a separate post.
Just as sin and suffering and the deprivation of others and myself hurts my heart, just as an imperfect relationship with God causes me to ache, so too does loneliness, desire to be someone's wife, the abandonments in my past. And just as sin and suffering and an imperfect relationship with God do not end in this life but are used by God in this broken world for my sanctification and for His glory - so too is it possible that my loneliness, my heart ache and sorrow not be appointed to end in this life. These things may be intended instead, in His perfect will, to draw me to Him; to sanctify me, allow me a deeper compassion and understanding than I posessed previously. A compassion intended for me to use to draw others to Him; a life that gives me a freedom that a married woman may not have. One that allows me to be more approachable to other women in similar situations and to have time to minister to women who feel the burden of children and husband and just need someone to talk to.
My ache for my Savior's appearing does not cause Him to come now. My heavenly bridegroom waits for a time appointed only by His Father. Thus also is it possible that my ache for human companionship does not mean such is appointed to end in this life. But instead, like all things, to be used for the glory of my God.
I do not presume to know the will of God. I know that His heart is for the widow and the orphan and the woman abandoned and alone; but I know above all His plans for those who love Him are for our eternal good and His glory, not for our temporary relief of suffering.
"You shall not oppress a hired servant [who is] poor and needy, [whether] one of your brethren or one of the aliens who [is] in your land within your gates...And you shall remember that you were a slave in the land of Egypt; therefore I command you to do this thing." Deuteronomy 24:14, 22 NKJV
God allowed the Israelites to be slaves in Egypt and to suffer so that they might have compassion on the poor, the needy, the nations that were not His favored (among other reasons).
And lest I should be exalted above measure by the abundance of the revelations, a thorn in the flesh was given to me, a messenger of Satan to buffet me, lest I be exalted above measure. Concerning this thing I pleaded with the Lord three times that it might depart from me. And He said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness." 2 Corinthians 12:7-9 NKJV
Nor did He chose to relieve Paul of his suffering but used it to teach him to rely on God. Why would one assume that He will automatically relieve me just because I hurt or that it would be His will?
Now, I'm not saying that it's not His will, either. His thoughts are much higher than mine. I'm just saying that a desire, even a good and godly desire, does not automatically mean God's will is to fulfill it.
Just as sin and suffering and the deprivation of others and myself hurts my heart, just as an imperfect relationship with God causes me to ache, so too does loneliness, desire to be someone's wife, the abandonments in my past. And just as sin and suffering and an imperfect relationship with God do not end in this life but are used by God in this broken world for my sanctification and for His glory - so too is it possible that my loneliness, my heart ache and sorrow not be appointed to end in this life. These things may be intended instead, in His perfect will, to draw me to Him; to sanctify me, allow me a deeper compassion and understanding than I posessed previously. A compassion intended for me to use to draw others to Him; a life that gives me a freedom that a married woman may not have. One that allows me to be more approachable to other women in similar situations and to have time to minister to women who feel the burden of children and husband and just need someone to talk to.
My ache for my Savior's appearing does not cause Him to come now. My heavenly bridegroom waits for a time appointed only by His Father. Thus also is it possible that my ache for human companionship does not mean such is appointed to end in this life. But instead, like all things, to be used for the glory of my God.
I do not presume to know the will of God. I know that His heart is for the widow and the orphan and the woman abandoned and alone; but I know above all His plans for those who love Him are for our eternal good and His glory, not for our temporary relief of suffering.
"You shall not oppress a hired servant [who is] poor and needy, [whether] one of your brethren or one of the aliens who [is] in your land within your gates...And you shall remember that you were a slave in the land of Egypt; therefore I command you to do this thing." Deuteronomy 24:14, 22 NKJV
God allowed the Israelites to be slaves in Egypt and to suffer so that they might have compassion on the poor, the needy, the nations that were not His favored (among other reasons).
And lest I should be exalted above measure by the abundance of the revelations, a thorn in the flesh was given to me, a messenger of Satan to buffet me, lest I be exalted above measure. Concerning this thing I pleaded with the Lord three times that it might depart from me. And He said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness." 2 Corinthians 12:7-9 NKJV
Nor did He chose to relieve Paul of his suffering but used it to teach him to rely on God. Why would one assume that He will automatically relieve me just because I hurt or that it would be His will?
Now, I'm not saying that it's not His will, either. His thoughts are much higher than mine. I'm just saying that a desire, even a good and godly desire, does not automatically mean God's will is to fulfill it.