You're not a real blonde?
School ended last week, but work didn't. Natsuyasumi is a lie!! All the teachers are still here, heck, most of the students are too!! BUT since there aren't any classes to teach, I'm allocating my resources to LJ and posting up some pictures piling up from the past few weeks . .
It's Elementary
You just have not LIVED until you get mobbed by a hundred elementary kids. It's just the happiest feeling in the world. ^__^ But being in a rush to get to class, I tried to trick them by disguising myself as a fish . .
. . . but no one bought it, so my first attempt at cosplay was a dud. ;_;
The ALT who thought up the Harry Potter game should be demanding royalties from Genki English because it's the greatest language game ever. You just can't go wrong with this one, though it does take a lot of time to prepare. Man, I remember being at school until 11 the night before just making thirty chopstick wands. ^^; Anyway, it was a great workout for all the students, teachers and me (dance Kebin dance!! Guwaaa!!), and made for a really fun and chaotic season finale before the break. I'd love to use this game again someday, but next time it's gonna be outdoors because a classroom just ain't big enough to contain a hundred Harrys and Voldemorts duelling to the death.
Since I wasn't able to find any Harry Potter music, the BGM we used were from music request slips filled out by the kids a couple weeks ago. It also gave me an idea of which singers and what songs were popular with kids right now, though knowing Japanese music trends, this list is probably already outdated. =/
Top 3 Singers among Hirono 6nensei
1. Orange Range [3 mb] - Orange Range is THE most popular singers among kids and teens right now. I gotta admit, their songs are reeeally catchy though their English sucks. I mean, I still don't know what a "Loco Lotion" is. Disclaimer: I'm not responsible for any brain damage that may occur for getting this song stuck in your head for the rest of the year.
2. Ken Hirai - This guy's really popular with girls right now. I'm not linking the song I found because it's pretty bad and not a good representation of some of the better works he's done.
3. Ai Otsuka [3.5 mb] - I have NO IDEA why this song is as popular as it is. It's the worst and most annoying Japanese song I've ever heard. You've been warned.
We didn't have enough time to play them, but #4 was Aya Ueto and #5 was Mr. Children. Mr. Children's "Sign" is insanely popular among all ages right now, I hear it everywhere and teachers will just start humming it for no reason . . . it may be the "Sekai ni . ." of 2004. ;) You're gonna have to find it yourself though cuz it's a long song and I don't have enough bandwidth to link it.
An Hour with the Beetles
I was pretty shocked arriving at the kominkan for the last children's conversation class . . .
. . . because every student was holding a kabuto, or stag beetle, in their hands. oO From what I learned, there was a huge beetle raising project at school that day. Only in Japan. ^^b Anyway, after A LOT of pressure, I finally caved in and held one.
They're actually really tame and safe, though their legs are a little prickly. This guy ended up crawling up my necktie, and when we pulled it off, it sounded like velcro. ^^;
We like Englisk!! ^^v
The girl is a 5th grader, the boy is a 6th grader, and the lady is my new English conversation assistant (who can't speak English :P). Usually during the fifteen-minute break between the 5nensei and the 6nensei classes, the girl stays behind and the boy comes early to doodle on the whiteboard and teach me how to draw.
Well, there's this poster of Noguchi Hideyo that's been hanging in the room for weeks, so we decided he would be the subject of today's collaborative doodle. However, we soon realized that he resembled a much more famous icon, so we changed our direction halfway through. ;)
Things that go boom in the night
Usually I doodle with the girl because the boy likes drawing really strange pictures of me. That day, he drew me in a grave; he explained I had died when my car collided with his. oO Don't get the wrong expression of the boy though because he actually likes me the most of all the 6nensei . . . he's just a little weird and nihilistic. ;)
But it was kinda ironic because later that night, I thought I really was going to die. I had started the gas stove up to heat up the frying pan for dinner, but just as I finished chopping up the konyaku, I noticed there was an odd smell in the air, like Mr. Matsumoto was smoking in my house. So I checked the frying pan, and noticed that the gas pipe leading into the stove had caught on fire.
. . . EEEEEEEGAAAAAAAAAADSSSSS!!!
I quickly turned off the stove and the gas, but the fire still wouldn't go away!! Since I didn't have a fire extinguisher, I ended up dousing it with a cup of water. Sorry folks, I decided that this wasn't a good time to grab my camera so no pics of the fire. But I did take a picture of the aftermath . .
So the next day, I decided to pay a visit to the BOE armed with this picture, and they sent some guys over to assess the problem. They recommended I keep the stove away from the wall; I think I must've pushed it in when I was cleaning it a few months ago and never realized what a hazard I had created. >< The next morning, the guys returned to drill a hole in my wall and move the pipe line behind the stove to prevent Mr. No-Common-Sense from ever pushing the stove underneath it again. ^^;;
So in short, I've been cooking konyaku safely since then. :)
Japanese-Canadian Lunch!
And now onto the right side of the bed cuz in just one weekend, I made several blissful discoveries in regards to food in my area . . .
[At Tomioka's TomTom] Truly the single greatest discovery since I came to Japan: twelve thin-sliced, double-soft whole wheat bread!! It's the first loaf I've found in Japan that tastes exactly the same as Canadian bread, AND with 12 slices, it will actually last me longer than two days. =D
[At Hirono's 7-11] O . . . M . . . . G . . . . how I missed seeing that flag. ;_;
[In Iwaki] Do I even need to explain this one, especially in ultra-humid 35°C temperature? XD
The Truth is Out There
Last week, the school president came up to me for help with writing an English slogan for Hirono's Summer Festival. Now why you would want to make an English slogan when I'm one of the only people in town that can read and understand it is beyond me. Anyway, I fixed up the Engrish he'd written already and we ended up with: "We're not alone because everyone's here." It felt like a faithful translation of his Japanese slogan, but at the same time, something seemed wrong.
Me: Waitaminute . . . "we're not alone?" That's really weird . . . "You're not alone" sounds better.
Prez: We're not alone, ok?
Me: No, not ok. "You're" is "boku." "We're" is "bokutachi."
Prez: Bokutachi. Hai.
Me: But look, "everyone" already is "bokutachi." So "we're not alone" sounds like aliens are preparing to invade the planet. Do you understand?
Prez: Bokutachi! Bokutachi!
Me: But this is a summer festival! Not X-Files!
Prez: We're not alone, ok?
Guess who won that argument.
Well, at least the slogan for this year's school festival turned out better. Once again for whatever reason, they wanted it in English and told me the theme was "kizuna" which translates to "bonds." Kizuna is a very popular word, I've seen it used in many episode titles, at least three song titles . . . in fact, I think there was a Japanese band that named themselves "kizuna." I never really understood its popularity, "bonds" is just a strange word to me. Maybe it's because of its uncommon usage in English, or maybe it's because the Japanese use the word by itself, not as part of a sentence. Think about it, naming a song "Bonds," . . . or "Love," or "Friendships" for that matter.
Er, anyway so now I had to sit down and work with this strange word. After several revisions, I finally came up with "Our bonds create our future" which sounds pretty cool, actually. :) It sure sounds better than the teacher's "People our bond it is interesting " at any rate. ;)
Reading Break
500 pages of text and no pictures whatsoever . . . WAZZUPWITDAT?!!
Chicken Soup for the Insect Soul
And finally, I end with an inspirational story . . .
Living in Japan for a year has really hardened me towards insects. I'm not as afraid as I used to be, and I've actually taken on a hobby of "bug photography." But there are two kinds of bugs that I still can't stand. #1: Spiders. Walking through a spider web is one of the most chilling feelings in the world, especially when it's in the middle of the night and you're just waking up to get a glass of water. >< And Japanese spiders look way more poisonous and angry, too.
The other is the cockroach. They don't just crawl, they hop . . . it's really freaky when you're just looking at one at a distance, and then *hop* *hop* now they're right in front of you. And you can't vacuum them either cuz they'll just hop away.
This is the story of one cockroach I found in front of my fridge when I came downstairs for a snack. I've nicknamed him Spartacus, for not only was he big but he had an impressive endurance and will to live.
Normally when I see a bug that can't be removed from my house in any other way except death, my weapon of choice is The Insecticide Spray from Hell. Seriously, I really hate resorting to this because it reminds me of that outlawed phaser from an old episode of Star Trek. Man, that phaser was creepy, when Data's buddy got shot, she was slowly torn apart from the inside in a long, agonizing scene before finally being vaporized. >< Sometimes I wonder if this spray works in the same way, because even just a small wiff of the chemical sends the victim into a complete frenzy. They'll run around the floor, watch as their legs begin to droop and break off, and then slowly, sloooowly wither away in a twitching puddle of their former selves. And then they usually stick to the floor which makes it hard to remove the corpse later on, as if to say "I was murdered here. My blood shall stain this floor forever." So it's painful to watch, but it ALWAYS gets the job done.
Spartacus, however, was different. I sprayed him once, and as expected, he started hopping around like mad, banging his head against the wall over and over like he had just seen the ending of Spielberg's A.I. I couldn't stand watching him suffer, and went upstairs for a breather. But when I came back a few minutes later to check up on him, he was still moving, rubbing his legs like he had a bad itch. So I sprayed him again, and again jump --> head --> wall --> repeat. But he remained very much alive so I sprayed him again. And again. And again.
But when the smoke cleared, there he was, still hoping away.
So I tried a new tactic . . . .
All he had to do was move in any direction, and I'd have him. But no, this would be too simple a fate for the Great Spartacus. So he just sat there, waving his feelers around to show that he was still very much alive.
After an hour of wrestling with the guy and waiting, I completely lost it and launched the most horrific spray I've ever unleashed, holding onto the button until everything organic in my kitchen was dead. Then I left for bed, shaken but relieved.
.
.
.
.
The next morning, I found Spartacus in front of my fridge again. While he looked alive in that he wasn't a crumpled mess, there was zero movement. So I went to vacuum it up, but it refused to be sucked. Thinking that it was just stuck to the floor, I nudged it a bit with the nozzle . . . .
. . . AND IT MOVED!!!!!!!!
I literally collapsed in complete panic and disbelief. He was just toying with me! He was still very much alive!! I couldn't believe it, this bug had not only survived seven sprays of insecticide when one was enough to snub out any mortal insect, and avoided the temptation of my cockroach traps, but also resisted the super suction power of my vacuum. How? How??? HOW?!!
This was the day when those gas pipe guys came over to drill that hole, and when they knocked on the door a second later, Spartacus woke and made his move. Slowly, ever so slowly, he crawled towards the back door. I was stunned, it was like he was drawing a truce and just wanted to leave now. I obeyed, slid the door open, and he crawled out into freedom. It reminded of Lock Up, one of my favorite movies as a kid (maybe because it was the first R rated movie I saw more than any other reason ;) ). In the final scene, we see Sly Stallone, battered and bruised, staggering out from the prison that beat him silly for a crime HE DID NOT COMMIT!! In a sense, Spartacus was the same, and his will to survive earned him his freedom.
It was really beautiful and moving, I wanted to take a picture of him crawling out into the open, but I didn't want the repairmen to think I was nuts (I think they was already questioning my sanity when they saw all those cockroach traps lined up in the kitchen.) So I'll recreate the scene through MS Paint instead . . .
I never saw Spartacus again, but I'll always remember him as the first insect that gained my respect. This is the kind of guy you want on your team. God bless you, cockroach, may you live to a ripe old age and inspire other cockroaches . . . TO AVOID MY HOUSE!!!
It's Elementary
You just have not LIVED until you get mobbed by a hundred elementary kids. It's just the happiest feeling in the world. ^__^ But being in a rush to get to class, I tried to trick them by disguising myself as a fish . .
. . . but no one bought it, so my first attempt at cosplay was a dud. ;_;
The ALT who thought up the Harry Potter game should be demanding royalties from Genki English because it's the greatest language game ever. You just can't go wrong with this one, though it does take a lot of time to prepare. Man, I remember being at school until 11 the night before just making thirty chopstick wands. ^^; Anyway, it was a great workout for all the students, teachers and me (dance Kebin dance!! Guwaaa!!), and made for a really fun and chaotic season finale before the break. I'd love to use this game again someday, but next time it's gonna be outdoors because a classroom just ain't big enough to contain a hundred Harrys and Voldemorts duelling to the death.
Since I wasn't able to find any Harry Potter music, the BGM we used were from music request slips filled out by the kids a couple weeks ago. It also gave me an idea of which singers and what songs were popular with kids right now, though knowing Japanese music trends, this list is probably already outdated. =/
Top 3 Singers among Hirono 6nensei
1. Orange Range [3 mb] - Orange Range is THE most popular singers among kids and teens right now. I gotta admit, their songs are reeeally catchy though their English sucks. I mean, I still don't know what a "Loco Lotion" is. Disclaimer: I'm not responsible for any brain damage that may occur for getting this song stuck in your head for the rest of the year.
2. Ken Hirai - This guy's really popular with girls right now. I'm not linking the song I found because it's pretty bad and not a good representation of some of the better works he's done.
3. Ai Otsuka [3.5 mb] - I have NO IDEA why this song is as popular as it is. It's the worst and most annoying Japanese song I've ever heard. You've been warned.
We didn't have enough time to play them, but #4 was Aya Ueto and #5 was Mr. Children. Mr. Children's "Sign" is insanely popular among all ages right now, I hear it everywhere and teachers will just start humming it for no reason . . . it may be the "Sekai ni . ." of 2004. ;) You're gonna have to find it yourself though cuz it's a long song and I don't have enough bandwidth to link it.
An Hour with the Beetles
I was pretty shocked arriving at the kominkan for the last children's conversation class . . .
. . . because every student was holding a kabuto, or stag beetle, in their hands. oO From what I learned, there was a huge beetle raising project at school that day. Only in Japan. ^^b Anyway, after A LOT of pressure, I finally caved in and held one.
They're actually really tame and safe, though their legs are a little prickly. This guy ended up crawling up my necktie, and when we pulled it off, it sounded like velcro. ^^;
We like Englisk!! ^^v
The girl is a 5th grader, the boy is a 6th grader, and the lady is my new English conversation assistant (who can't speak English :P). Usually during the fifteen-minute break between the 5nensei and the 6nensei classes, the girl stays behind and the boy comes early to doodle on the whiteboard and teach me how to draw.
Well, there's this poster of Noguchi Hideyo that's been hanging in the room for weeks, so we decided he would be the subject of today's collaborative doodle. However, we soon realized that he resembled a much more famous icon, so we changed our direction halfway through. ;)
Things that go boom in the night
Usually I doodle with the girl because the boy likes drawing really strange pictures of me. That day, he drew me in a grave; he explained I had died when my car collided with his. oO Don't get the wrong expression of the boy though because he actually likes me the most of all the 6nensei . . . he's just a little weird and nihilistic. ;)
But it was kinda ironic because later that night, I thought I really was going to die. I had started the gas stove up to heat up the frying pan for dinner, but just as I finished chopping up the konyaku, I noticed there was an odd smell in the air, like Mr. Matsumoto was smoking in my house. So I checked the frying pan, and noticed that the gas pipe leading into the stove had caught on fire.
. . . EEEEEEEGAAAAAAAAAADSSSSS!!!
I quickly turned off the stove and the gas, but the fire still wouldn't go away!! Since I didn't have a fire extinguisher, I ended up dousing it with a cup of water. Sorry folks, I decided that this wasn't a good time to grab my camera so no pics of the fire. But I did take a picture of the aftermath . .
So the next day, I decided to pay a visit to the BOE armed with this picture, and they sent some guys over to assess the problem. They recommended I keep the stove away from the wall; I think I must've pushed it in when I was cleaning it a few months ago and never realized what a hazard I had created. >< The next morning, the guys returned to drill a hole in my wall and move the pipe line behind the stove to prevent Mr. No-Common-Sense from ever pushing the stove underneath it again. ^^;;
So in short, I've been cooking konyaku safely since then. :)
Japanese-Canadian Lunch!
And now onto the right side of the bed cuz in just one weekend, I made several blissful discoveries in regards to food in my area . . .
[At Tomioka's TomTom] Truly the single greatest discovery since I came to Japan: twelve thin-sliced, double-soft whole wheat bread!! It's the first loaf I've found in Japan that tastes exactly the same as Canadian bread, AND with 12 slices, it will actually last me longer than two days. =D
[At Hirono's 7-11] O . . . M . . . . G . . . . how I missed seeing that flag. ;_;
[In Iwaki] Do I even need to explain this one, especially in ultra-humid 35°C temperature? XD
The Truth is Out There
Last week, the school president came up to me for help with writing an English slogan for Hirono's Summer Festival. Now why you would want to make an English slogan when I'm one of the only people in town that can read and understand it is beyond me. Anyway, I fixed up the Engrish he'd written already and we ended up with: "We're not alone because everyone's here." It felt like a faithful translation of his Japanese slogan, but at the same time, something seemed wrong.
Me: Waitaminute . . . "we're not alone?" That's really weird . . . "You're not alone" sounds better.
Prez: We're not alone, ok?
Me: No, not ok. "You're" is "boku." "We're" is "bokutachi."
Prez: Bokutachi. Hai.
Me: But look, "everyone" already is "bokutachi." So "we're not alone" sounds like aliens are preparing to invade the planet. Do you understand?
Prez: Bokutachi! Bokutachi!
Me: But this is a summer festival! Not X-Files!
Prez: We're not alone, ok?
Guess who won that argument.
Well, at least the slogan for this year's school festival turned out better. Once again for whatever reason, they wanted it in English and told me the theme was "kizuna" which translates to "bonds." Kizuna is a very popular word, I've seen it used in many episode titles, at least three song titles . . . in fact, I think there was a Japanese band that named themselves "kizuna." I never really understood its popularity, "bonds" is just a strange word to me. Maybe it's because of its uncommon usage in English, or maybe it's because the Japanese use the word by itself, not as part of a sentence. Think about it, naming a song "Bonds," . . . or "Love," or "Friendships" for that matter.
Er, anyway so now I had to sit down and work with this strange word. After several revisions, I finally came up with "Our bonds create our future" which sounds pretty cool, actually. :) It sure sounds better than the teacher's "People our bond it is interesting " at any rate. ;)
Reading Break
500 pages of text and no pictures whatsoever . . . WAZZUPWITDAT?!!
Chicken Soup for the Insect Soul
And finally, I end with an inspirational story . . .
Living in Japan for a year has really hardened me towards insects. I'm not as afraid as I used to be, and I've actually taken on a hobby of "bug photography." But there are two kinds of bugs that I still can't stand. #1: Spiders. Walking through a spider web is one of the most chilling feelings in the world, especially when it's in the middle of the night and you're just waking up to get a glass of water. >< And Japanese spiders look way more poisonous and angry, too.
The other is the cockroach. They don't just crawl, they hop . . . it's really freaky when you're just looking at one at a distance, and then *hop* *hop* now they're right in front of you. And you can't vacuum them either cuz they'll just hop away.
This is the story of one cockroach I found in front of my fridge when I came downstairs for a snack. I've nicknamed him Spartacus, for not only was he big but he had an impressive endurance and will to live.
Normally when I see a bug that can't be removed from my house in any other way except death, my weapon of choice is The Insecticide Spray from Hell. Seriously, I really hate resorting to this because it reminds me of that outlawed phaser from an old episode of Star Trek. Man, that phaser was creepy, when Data's buddy got shot, she was slowly torn apart from the inside in a long, agonizing scene before finally being vaporized. >< Sometimes I wonder if this spray works in the same way, because even just a small wiff of the chemical sends the victim into a complete frenzy. They'll run around the floor, watch as their legs begin to droop and break off, and then slowly, sloooowly wither away in a twitching puddle of their former selves. And then they usually stick to the floor which makes it hard to remove the corpse later on, as if to say "I was murdered here. My blood shall stain this floor forever." So it's painful to watch, but it ALWAYS gets the job done.
Spartacus, however, was different. I sprayed him once, and as expected, he started hopping around like mad, banging his head against the wall over and over like he had just seen the ending of Spielberg's A.I. I couldn't stand watching him suffer, and went upstairs for a breather. But when I came back a few minutes later to check up on him, he was still moving, rubbing his legs like he had a bad itch. So I sprayed him again, and again jump --> head --> wall --> repeat. But he remained very much alive so I sprayed him again. And again. And again.
But when the smoke cleared, there he was, still hoping away.
So I tried a new tactic . . . .
All he had to do was move in any direction, and I'd have him. But no, this would be too simple a fate for the Great Spartacus. So he just sat there, waving his feelers around to show that he was still very much alive.
After an hour of wrestling with the guy and waiting, I completely lost it and launched the most horrific spray I've ever unleashed, holding onto the button until everything organic in my kitchen was dead. Then I left for bed, shaken but relieved.
.
.
.
.
The next morning, I found Spartacus in front of my fridge again. While he looked alive in that he wasn't a crumpled mess, there was zero movement. So I went to vacuum it up, but it refused to be sucked. Thinking that it was just stuck to the floor, I nudged it a bit with the nozzle . . . .
. . . AND IT MOVED!!!!!!!!
I literally collapsed in complete panic and disbelief. He was just toying with me! He was still very much alive!! I couldn't believe it, this bug had not only survived seven sprays of insecticide when one was enough to snub out any mortal insect, and avoided the temptation of my cockroach traps, but also resisted the super suction power of my vacuum. How? How??? HOW?!!
This was the day when those gas pipe guys came over to drill that hole, and when they knocked on the door a second later, Spartacus woke and made his move. Slowly, ever so slowly, he crawled towards the back door. I was stunned, it was like he was drawing a truce and just wanted to leave now. I obeyed, slid the door open, and he crawled out into freedom. It reminded of Lock Up, one of my favorite movies as a kid (maybe because it was the first R rated movie I saw more than any other reason ;) ). In the final scene, we see Sly Stallone, battered and bruised, staggering out from the prison that beat him silly for a crime HE DID NOT COMMIT!! In a sense, Spartacus was the same, and his will to survive earned him his freedom.
It was really beautiful and moving, I wanted to take a picture of him crawling out into the open, but I didn't want the repairmen to think I was nuts (I think they was already questioning my sanity when they saw all those cockroach traps lined up in the kitchen.) So I'll recreate the scene through MS Paint instead . . .
I never saw Spartacus again, but I'll always remember him as the first insect that gained my respect. This is the kind of guy you want on your team. God bless you, cockroach, may you live to a ripe old age and inspire other cockroaches . . . TO AVOID MY HOUSE!!!