Long absence....

[chee_]

So its been a while, I haven't written in a long time, but something drove me to write. Maybe a sense of change, I dont know. But anyhow, I haven't yet left for the NG. Training was supposed to be scheduled on sept. 23. But most unfortunately, my recruiter messed up, and did not schedule me for a physical, and I did not depart on the given day. So I remain, here, awaiting departure, lost inbetween leaving and staying. I just want to go now, nothing is good for me anymore, I dont do anything I used to do, I have 2 friends, and I am just getting more depressed as the days drag, me and my girlfriend fight daily, dont think thats gonna last long. I feel we are going to have a huge fight and I am goin to get fed up and take off. She doesn't even seem to care about me, and I need a girlfriend who does. A girlfriend whos always holding me and near me, and always touches me and shows that she loves me. Is that so much to ask? I dont want a slave, or money, I just want to know that Im loved, and have someone who is there to support me mentally. That doesn't seem to exist, well anyways, all I can think about is the old days, how much fun things were. *sigh* this is all, Im to emotionally drained, lat3r....

§~Chee~§