(no subject)
Sorry to hit the party so late. Not the way I normally do things, but... well, there were, unsurprisingly, clerical obstacles in my way.
Here's how it went down: last spring, well ahead of the deadline, I submitted my advancement request (to skip ahead a year -- guess I'll be the baby of the clique. If you'll have me.)
Enter our stately administrative assistant, her soft cardigan buttoned over a clean white t-shirt reading, I swear, Semper Cunctor: Mrs. Varner, who simply fills the front office, always ready with a charming "hiya" or "hold please" or "who were you again?" Even Time slows down beside her majestic gravity: for there was my application, still in her inbox, as if not a day had passed.
It took almost a month of networking my little ass off (with considerable help from Mom), but I was able to get the dean (whose wife has a weakness for sestinas and fine wine, and who shares a mutual acquaintance with my uncle) to personally review my request. And so here I am today, and here, by Saint Loy, is my revised class schedule... (I really look forward to meeting you all on Monday -- I've been lurking through your weblogs; you guys are a trip in every delightful sense of the word):
BLOCK I, 8:10-9:00 - CALM. It's the 'I remain calm' but for jurge to erk/come out my humble go berzerk and make you swallow your smirk... I've heard great things about this class.
BLOCK II, 9:10-10:00 - English. One second Varner is telling me the class is full up and I'll have to bump Geography from Block IV (which would be sad but not devastating), then they register me anyway. Probably just marked the wrong column. I hope there's a spare seat.
BLOCK III, 10:10-11:00 - Physics. I'm already talking about gravitational pulls, so what the hell. How bad can it be?
BLOCK 3 1/2, 11:00-11:40 - French. I'm conversational but rusty, and haven't really studied it formally yet.
BLOCK IV, 11:40-12:30 - Social Studies: Geography. Gotta know the map before you can travel.
BLOCK V, 12:40-1:30 - Poli Sci. Bring it on... oh yes.
BLOCK VI, 1:40-2:30/(2:10) - Math. A favorite subject, which (it figures) is the one I have to leave early every other day for my internship in the city. I tried to swing it so I could get CALM last (and so get to leave CALM early) but, again, no administrators seem to know what they're doing (and are using an outdated OS, I might add).
This is a public journal, and I might be nervous that Varner might find out I'm talking trash about her: but I'm pretty sure she remains convinced that my name is William (as if there weren't enough Williams in this grade! How many Bills have you already got? Forty?). Protected by my accidental anonimato, I think it's safe to vent my frustrations just this once. And to add that the mole thing on her nose is narrrrrsty and very distracting. Don't lie, you know you stare at it whenever you're in the office.
And I'm sure, at every single class attendance for two weeks, I'll have to say, "No, it's Jeff. I'm Jeff. I'm not William. He's William. And him. And him, I think. And her." But I'm glad to be here, and can't wait to start playing catch-up.
In closing, and in a desperate but hopefully endearing attempt to make friends, I'll just come out and say it: my family is in the wine business (among other businesses). And my parents are pretty chill, or otherwise easy to charm...
Here's how it went down: last spring, well ahead of the deadline, I submitted my advancement request (to skip ahead a year -- guess I'll be the baby of the clique. If you'll have me.)
Enter our stately administrative assistant, her soft cardigan buttoned over a clean white t-shirt reading, I swear, Semper Cunctor: Mrs. Varner, who simply fills the front office, always ready with a charming "hiya" or "hold please" or "who were you again?" Even Time slows down beside her majestic gravity: for there was my application, still in her inbox, as if not a day had passed.
It took almost a month of networking my little ass off (with considerable help from Mom), but I was able to get the dean (whose wife has a weakness for sestinas and fine wine, and who shares a mutual acquaintance with my uncle) to personally review my request. And so here I am today, and here, by Saint Loy, is my revised class schedule... (I really look forward to meeting you all on Monday -- I've been lurking through your weblogs; you guys are a trip in every delightful sense of the word):
BLOCK I, 8:10-9:00 - CALM. It's the 'I remain calm' but for jurge to erk/come out my humble go berzerk and make you swallow your smirk... I've heard great things about this class.
BLOCK II, 9:10-10:00 - English. One second Varner is telling me the class is full up and I'll have to bump Geography from Block IV (which would be sad but not devastating), then they register me anyway. Probably just marked the wrong column. I hope there's a spare seat.
BLOCK III, 10:10-11:00 - Physics. I'm already talking about gravitational pulls, so what the hell. How bad can it be?
BLOCK 3 1/2, 11:00-11:40 - French. I'm conversational but rusty, and haven't really studied it formally yet.
BLOCK IV, 11:40-12:30 - Social Studies: Geography. Gotta know the map before you can travel.
BLOCK V, 12:40-1:30 - Poli Sci. Bring it on... oh yes.
BLOCK VI, 1:40-2:30/(2:10) - Math. A favorite subject, which (it figures) is the one I have to leave early every other day for my internship in the city. I tried to swing it so I could get CALM last (and so get to leave CALM early) but, again, no administrators seem to know what they're doing (and are using an outdated OS, I might add).
This is a public journal, and I might be nervous that Varner might find out I'm talking trash about her: but I'm pretty sure she remains convinced that my name is William (as if there weren't enough Williams in this grade! How many Bills have you already got? Forty?). Protected by my accidental anonimato, I think it's safe to vent my frustrations just this once. And to add that the mole thing on her nose is narrrrrsty and very distracting. Don't lie, you know you stare at it whenever you're in the office.
And I'm sure, at every single class attendance for two weeks, I'll have to say, "No, it's Jeff. I'm Jeff. I'm not William. He's William. And him. And him, I think. And her." But I'm glad to be here, and can't wait to start playing catch-up.
In closing, and in a desperate but hopefully endearing attempt to make friends, I'll just come out and say it: my family is in the wine business (among other businesses). And my parents are pretty chill, or otherwise easy to charm...