its been a while
Ok so its been a while since ive actually had the time to sit down and write one of these... so i guess i just want to get some things down in writing so that i remember this point in my life. Its weird how when you are in the midst of something in your life you feel so different than you did after looking back... whatever! Ha Im so giddy its crazy!
I havent felt like this in such a long time, in fact i dont think ive ever felt like this. I know now I was never in love till this point. Back then i thought so but looking back its so different. I know that i cared, but dont anymore. I know that i worried, but now i dont. I know that i missed him, but i dont anymore.
it feels so amazing to care, worry, and miss someone else. Im so happy, work is fun, my friends are great (i mean i actually get to keep them now), night life exists, and waking up next to someone else, feels like its never felt before.
Its like for 3 years i had this heavy burden weighing me down and holding me back. For those 3 years i was dead... to the world, to my family and friends, and to who i really was.... its like im finally alive for the first time in a long time and i know now that even though it hurt at the time it was what i needed to actually be sarah, the sarah that everyone who ever meant anything to me, loves.
And to the one who could not be here to see me truly happy, I know you are smiling down from heaven knowing that i am now. Thank you... you were always there through his crap, and you tried so hard to keep my hopes up. I love you and there is not a day that goes by that i dont think about you, and maybe he is the reason we met, and i guess that is the one thing i should be grateful to billy for...
I havent felt like this in such a long time, in fact i dont think ive ever felt like this. I know now I was never in love till this point. Back then i thought so but looking back its so different. I know that i cared, but dont anymore. I know that i worried, but now i dont. I know that i missed him, but i dont anymore.
it feels so amazing to care, worry, and miss someone else. Im so happy, work is fun, my friends are great (i mean i actually get to keep them now), night life exists, and waking up next to someone else, feels like its never felt before.
Its like for 3 years i had this heavy burden weighing me down and holding me back. For those 3 years i was dead... to the world, to my family and friends, and to who i really was.... its like im finally alive for the first time in a long time and i know now that even though it hurt at the time it was what i needed to actually be sarah, the sarah that everyone who ever meant anything to me, loves.
And to the one who could not be here to see me truly happy, I know you are smiling down from heaven knowing that i am now. Thank you... you were always there through his crap, and you tried so hard to keep my hopes up. I love you and there is not a day that goes by that i dont think about you, and maybe he is the reason we met, and i guess that is the one thing i should be grateful to billy for...