ha-cha-cha
anonymous
November 1 2007, 15:51:04 UTC
dearest tre i miss you. i dont really know what else to say except "how are you" which is so lame because it's said all the time and all people ever say is "good". "how are you" is used so readily, its meaning is completely gone, it doesnt' mean anything anymore. Its like a greeting you know. So it doesn't inspire anyone to ever say how they've been, thus its a completely worthless statment because it never gets anyone anywhere. but i dont really know what to replace it with. i mean... it IS really the most DIRECT way to ask the question.. direct, but you never actually get the REAL answer.
i mean i'm looking for the real answer, cause thats what i want, i want to know what you are doing with yourself and how its going, and how its been, and what you'll do next. etc etc.
sometimes i think the only way to really figure out how you're doing is to maybe... just meet up with you somewheres.. and i'd figure it out becausee i'd litterally SEE what you're doing. how you are, and how you feel, i would see that on your face and i would get what i really REALLY want, which is to SEE you so i can SEE for myself how you are and where you are, and what you're doing. Plus i would not just veiw it, but experience it for myself. and all that. and it would be good.
however, due to certain circumstances i seem to have impLANTED myself into society.. which, at this juncture, would be ...bad for me to leave. i know what you're thinking, "chelsea just leave, i did, its totally worth it" and i would totally believe you. it makes me so happy what you're doing and i would love to expirience it as well... but i'm sure you'll understand when i tell you that i'm in school right now... i'm moving, towards a goal to finish it and it will make me happy to be a graduate of college...i'm REALLY happy being here right now, and i'm also SUPER invested in it. (student loans and all that non-such stuff). if i left right now, even just for a few months, i would have to start paying my student loans back... which i can't do right now because i have to spend so much time in class and doing homework... so i can't work more than i already am... so i can't afford to pay them back right now, because i can't afford to even pay for school with what i'm making. i'm not complaining, i'm fine with my current situation, its just a delicate balance is all, and if i leave now... that balance will be interrupted and fucked up and i would be royally FUCCCCkkkkeedd :) hahah! anyways. I'm a biology major (happyhappyhappy) with a conservation minor (happyhappyhappy) about to hopefully start doing some internships (happyhappyhappy) where i will be going someplace cool, (happyhappyhappy) like AK, or MO, or CA (HAPPYHAPPYHAPPY) and begin working to better our environment (happyhappyhappy)...which is my ultimate goal in life. :)
and i'm living with warren and we're so in love, and he's a land use planning major... hoping also to better our environment... and it makes me so happy. I'm so poor, but i'm so happy.
it's sort of lonely here, not too many people here in rf right now... but i have close contacts with everyone via-the lovely INTER-net (and with you also)... and i'm going on a visit with Ashley to see Robin in LaCrosse in a few weeks, which will make me happy.
so, how am i, well i'm pretty happy. I said that word like 400 times now so i prolly wont say it anymore.
and, for lack of a better sentance, how are you?
are you happy? what makes you happy? where are you this second, what can you see, how do you feel, what is it like. do you miss us? what do you think about?
i miss you. i dont really know what else to say except "how are you" which is so lame because it's said all the time and all people ever say is "good". "how are you" is used so readily, its meaning is completely gone, it doesnt' mean anything anymore. Its like a greeting you know. So it doesn't inspire anyone to ever say how they've been, thus its a completely worthless statment because it never gets anyone anywhere. but i dont really know what to replace it with. i mean... it IS really the most DIRECT way to ask the question.. direct, but you never actually get the REAL answer.
i mean i'm looking for the real answer, cause thats what i want, i want to know what you are doing with yourself and how its going, and how its been, and what you'll do next. etc etc.
sometimes i think the only way to really figure out how you're doing is to maybe... just meet up with you somewheres.. and i'd figure it out becausee i'd litterally SEE what you're doing. how you are, and how you feel, i would see that on your face and i would get what i really REALLY want, which is to SEE you so i can SEE for myself how you are and where you are, and what you're doing. Plus i would not just veiw it, but experience it for myself. and all that.
and it would be good.
however, due to certain circumstances i seem to have impLANTED myself into society.. which, at this juncture, would be ...bad for me to leave. i know what you're thinking, "chelsea just leave, i did, its totally worth it" and i would totally believe you. it makes me so happy what you're doing and i would love to expirience it as well... but i'm sure you'll understand when i tell you that i'm in school right now... i'm moving, towards a goal to finish it and it will make me happy to be a graduate of college...i'm REALLY happy being here right now, and i'm also SUPER invested in it. (student loans and all that non-such stuff). if i left right now, even just for a few months, i would have to start paying my student loans back... which i can't do right now because i have to spend so much time in class and doing homework... so i can't work more than i already am... so i can't afford to pay them back right now, because i can't afford to even pay for school with what i'm making.
i'm not complaining, i'm fine with my current situation, its just a delicate balance is all, and if i leave now... that balance will be interrupted and fucked up and i would be royally FUCCCCkkkkeedd :) hahah!
anyways. I'm a biology major (happyhappyhappy) with a conservation minor (happyhappyhappy) about to hopefully start doing some internships (happyhappyhappy) where i will be going someplace cool, (happyhappyhappy) like AK, or MO, or CA (HAPPYHAPPYHAPPY) and begin working to better our environment (happyhappyhappy)...which is my ultimate goal in life. :)
and i'm living with warren and we're so in love, and he's a land use planning major... hoping also to better our environment... and it makes me so happy. I'm so poor, but i'm so happy.
it's sort of lonely here, not too many people here in rf right now... but i have close contacts with everyone via-the lovely INTER-net (and with you also)... and i'm going on a visit with Ashley to see Robin in LaCrosse in a few weeks, which will make me happy.
so, how am i, well i'm pretty happy. I said that word like 400 times now so i prolly wont say it anymore.
and, for lack of a better sentance, how are you?
are you happy?
what makes you happy?
where are you this second, what can you see, how do you feel, what is it like.
do you miss us?
what do you think about?
lots of love and happy trails,
Chelsea
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