A How-To Manual for Bonding
Title: A How-To Manual for Bonding
Author: chasingtides
Fandom: Leverage
Characters: Parker/Hardison, Eliot, Sophie
Rating: G
Prompt: Parker's cool with his body as it is; besides, sometimes it's handy in his line of work. He just wishes Sophie'd give up the girl bonding crap.
Parker sat on the rooftop, his knees pressed up against his chest, and watched all the people come in and out of McRory’s. It was one of the bad days, the ones where he felt his body too much and nearly wanted to tear off his skin and show the boy thief who hid inside the shape of the pretty girl thief.
He had his fluffy hoodie and his black jeans and left Bunny with Hardison to keep him company when Parker just couldn’t be there. On the bad days, he couldn’t curl up next to Hardison or spar with Eliot or watch Nate play chess with himself or let Sophie put him in pretty, sexy dresses. The bad days didn’t come often, less now with his new family than when he was with Archie as a teenager, but they seemed worse when they did, like a punch from Eliot instead of Hardison.
He saw Eliot come out of the roof access door, a plate of Parker’s favorite spinach eggs in hand, but he ignored him and hugged his legs more tightly. He could feel his tiny breasts through his t-shirt and hoodie and it made him queasy. He wanted it to be yesterday when they were flying home from Calgary and everything was fine.
“I thought you might be hungry,” Eliot said, putting the plate on the roof between them. “It looked like you were in a big hurry to get up here.”
Parker shrugged and watched a pickpocket work the street corner. She was young and clearly new at the job. Parker wondered if she even knew who lived above McRory’s.
Eliot tucked his legs under him and pulled his hair back, like he was getting ready for a fight. “Did you have a fight with Hardison last night?”
Parker didn’t say anything.
“Did you get hurt in the break in?”
Silence.
“Is this about Sophie saying you’re going to have a girls’ day of shopping and doing stuff at that fancy spa?”
“Probably.” He still didn’t look at Eliot. “How did you know?”
“You put on your favorite hoodie and came up to the roof. And this usually happens wehn Sophie wants some girl time with you.” He nudged the plate of eggs closer to Parker, but didn’t mention them.
“I need to be a better boy.”
“A better boy?”
“When I met Archie, he helped me be a better thief and now I’m the best. You could teach me how to be a better boy and then, if I’m the best, Sophie will stop trying to turn me into a girl.”
“So…” Eliot paused and stared over the edge of the roof with him. “You’re a boy.”
He nodded and tucked his chin into the valley between his knees. He probably shouldn’t have said anything. Archie pretended he was a girl, just like Nate did, even when he told them they were wrong. And Hardison joined a couple of weird online groups and talk about him to his imaginary friends - but right now, Parker desperately needed Eliot to not just know, but understand.
“Just today? Or when Sophie wants to put you in high heels and show you how to flirt?” Eliot asked in a low voice, like when he talked to the clients he liked or to a kid.
“For always,” Parker told him, his soft and unhappy. “Parker was the best - a man and a thief and everything everyone said I wasn’t. That’s why I’m Parker.”
Eliot nodded, like maybe he actually got it. Then he closed his eyes. “Please tell me you’ve told Hardison that.”
“He tells his imaginary friends about his boyfriend.” Parker paused. “He also tells them he thinks you’re cute.”
“I didn’t want to know that.” Eliot ate a forkful of Parker’s eggs thoughtfully. “You could use a sock. Or wear button down shirts with, uh, -” Eliot lifted his hands and motioned awkwardly at his own chest - “extra layers.”
Parker laughed; the sound was tinny and small in the Boston air. “I don’t mean my body, not always. Besides, I know how to balance and jump and hide like this and men just forget about me.” He thought for a long moment and realised Eliot deserved to know because he really was trying. “When I was seventeen, I tried that. I cut my hair short and stuck stuff in my pants and wore one of those fancy binder things.”
Eliot took another bite of egg. “Yeah? What happened?”
“I couldn’t breathe so I passed out in a ventilation shaft for four hours.”
“So no changing clothes then.”
“I like not being dead.”
They sat on the edge of the roof for a while in silence. Eliot finished off the eggs and eventually Parker leaned his head on Eliot’s shoulder. He like that Eliot was safe and smart and had long hair like him and muscles bigger than Hardison’s. He liked even more how good it felt that Eliot didn’t care he wasn’t a girl anymore than Hardison had.
He hadn’t met anyone who didn’t care since Kelly and that was just because Kelly was like him. He had thought that’d what it took (and maybe Hardison spent a little too much time with his imaginary friends to be any more normal than he was). Archie and Nate and Sophie treated him like the girl he looked like. Hardison didn’t care, but he really liked to talk about it and asked stupid questions about surgery and hormones and his childhood.
“How do I become a better boy?”
Eliot wrapped an arm loosely around his should. “I figure you’re already a better guy than Hardison is. You know how to take care of yourself and what your weaknesses are. And you’re the world’s best thief.”
“Then why-” Parker cut himself short. Sophie wasn’t Eliot’s fault.
“How about you tell her what you’re telling me?”
“She gets that sad look on her face, like I took her paintings away,” Parker told him, frowning.
“She looks pretty sad when you spend the night on the roof after she offers you a day off.”
“A day pretending to be a girl!” Parker crossed his arms over his chest, grimacing at the feel of his breasts. “That’s just a day of grifting!”
“Why don’t you tell her that? She might be sad not to have another girl on the team, but she’s pretty damn miserable that you’re hiding from her, too.”
“Okay.” Parker gazed at the full moon hanging over the Pru like a giant lantern. He wished Hardison were up here, too, and not sleeping in front of the TV so he could have all the people who knew he was a boy together and then maybe he’d feel better about facing Sophie. But when Eliot ruffled his hair and didn’t push the subject, he thought that maybe it was nice enough as it was. He could do it. And maybe, for their day off, he could take Sophie bungee jumping instead.
Author: chasingtides
Fandom: Leverage
Characters: Parker/Hardison, Eliot, Sophie
Rating: G
Prompt: Parker's cool with his body as it is; besides, sometimes it's handy in his line of work. He just wishes Sophie'd give up the girl bonding crap.
Parker sat on the rooftop, his knees pressed up against his chest, and watched all the people come in and out of McRory’s. It was one of the bad days, the ones where he felt his body too much and nearly wanted to tear off his skin and show the boy thief who hid inside the shape of the pretty girl thief.
He had his fluffy hoodie and his black jeans and left Bunny with Hardison to keep him company when Parker just couldn’t be there. On the bad days, he couldn’t curl up next to Hardison or spar with Eliot or watch Nate play chess with himself or let Sophie put him in pretty, sexy dresses. The bad days didn’t come often, less now with his new family than when he was with Archie as a teenager, but they seemed worse when they did, like a punch from Eliot instead of Hardison.
He saw Eliot come out of the roof access door, a plate of Parker’s favorite spinach eggs in hand, but he ignored him and hugged his legs more tightly. He could feel his tiny breasts through his t-shirt and hoodie and it made him queasy. He wanted it to be yesterday when they were flying home from Calgary and everything was fine.
“I thought you might be hungry,” Eliot said, putting the plate on the roof between them. “It looked like you were in a big hurry to get up here.”
Parker shrugged and watched a pickpocket work the street corner. She was young and clearly new at the job. Parker wondered if she even knew who lived above McRory’s.
Eliot tucked his legs under him and pulled his hair back, like he was getting ready for a fight. “Did you have a fight with Hardison last night?”
Parker didn’t say anything.
“Did you get hurt in the break in?”
Silence.
“Is this about Sophie saying you’re going to have a girls’ day of shopping and doing stuff at that fancy spa?”
“Probably.” He still didn’t look at Eliot. “How did you know?”
“You put on your favorite hoodie and came up to the roof. And this usually happens wehn Sophie wants some girl time with you.” He nudged the plate of eggs closer to Parker, but didn’t mention them.
“I need to be a better boy.”
“A better boy?”
“When I met Archie, he helped me be a better thief and now I’m the best. You could teach me how to be a better boy and then, if I’m the best, Sophie will stop trying to turn me into a girl.”
“So…” Eliot paused and stared over the edge of the roof with him. “You’re a boy.”
He nodded and tucked his chin into the valley between his knees. He probably shouldn’t have said anything. Archie pretended he was a girl, just like Nate did, even when he told them they were wrong. And Hardison joined a couple of weird online groups and talk about him to his imaginary friends - but right now, Parker desperately needed Eliot to not just know, but understand.
“Just today? Or when Sophie wants to put you in high heels and show you how to flirt?” Eliot asked in a low voice, like when he talked to the clients he liked or to a kid.
“For always,” Parker told him, his soft and unhappy. “Parker was the best - a man and a thief and everything everyone said I wasn’t. That’s why I’m Parker.”
Eliot nodded, like maybe he actually got it. Then he closed his eyes. “Please tell me you’ve told Hardison that.”
“He tells his imaginary friends about his boyfriend.” Parker paused. “He also tells them he thinks you’re cute.”
“I didn’t want to know that.” Eliot ate a forkful of Parker’s eggs thoughtfully. “You could use a sock. Or wear button down shirts with, uh, -” Eliot lifted his hands and motioned awkwardly at his own chest - “extra layers.”
Parker laughed; the sound was tinny and small in the Boston air. “I don’t mean my body, not always. Besides, I know how to balance and jump and hide like this and men just forget about me.” He thought for a long moment and realised Eliot deserved to know because he really was trying. “When I was seventeen, I tried that. I cut my hair short and stuck stuff in my pants and wore one of those fancy binder things.”
Eliot took another bite of egg. “Yeah? What happened?”
“I couldn’t breathe so I passed out in a ventilation shaft for four hours.”
“So no changing clothes then.”
“I like not being dead.”
They sat on the edge of the roof for a while in silence. Eliot finished off the eggs and eventually Parker leaned his head on Eliot’s shoulder. He like that Eliot was safe and smart and had long hair like him and muscles bigger than Hardison’s. He liked even more how good it felt that Eliot didn’t care he wasn’t a girl anymore than Hardison had.
He hadn’t met anyone who didn’t care since Kelly and that was just because Kelly was like him. He had thought that’d what it took (and maybe Hardison spent a little too much time with his imaginary friends to be any more normal than he was). Archie and Nate and Sophie treated him like the girl he looked like. Hardison didn’t care, but he really liked to talk about it and asked stupid questions about surgery and hormones and his childhood.
“How do I become a better boy?”
Eliot wrapped an arm loosely around his should. “I figure you’re already a better guy than Hardison is. You know how to take care of yourself and what your weaknesses are. And you’re the world’s best thief.”
“Then why-” Parker cut himself short. Sophie wasn’t Eliot’s fault.
“How about you tell her what you’re telling me?”
“She gets that sad look on her face, like I took her paintings away,” Parker told him, frowning.
“She looks pretty sad when you spend the night on the roof after she offers you a day off.”
“A day pretending to be a girl!” Parker crossed his arms over his chest, grimacing at the feel of his breasts. “That’s just a day of grifting!”
“Why don’t you tell her that? She might be sad not to have another girl on the team, but she’s pretty damn miserable that you’re hiding from her, too.”
“Okay.” Parker gazed at the full moon hanging over the Pru like a giant lantern. He wished Hardison were up here, too, and not sleeping in front of the TV so he could have all the people who knew he was a boy together and then maybe he’d feel better about facing Sophie. But when Eliot ruffled his hair and didn’t push the subject, he thought that maybe it was nice enough as it was. He could do it. And maybe, for their day off, he could take Sophie bungee jumping instead.