bleh =/
so last night after i wrote about everything with me and ryan, things did get a little better. i sat here and talked to chelsea and landon for a while and both of them made me feel alot better with things they were saying. well i end up staying on here and talking to travis for a while cause i havent seen that kid or really talked to him in a while, he is such a great friend. well around one something i actually about fell asleep then my phone starts going off, so i grab it and it says 'Ryan S.' so my heart pretty much sank.. i answered it and it was him and his friends fucking around and just saying shit that i wasnt in the mood to listen to. so i hung up and they called back and left like two or three messages, so i got pissed and got up and got on the computer and started sending messages to his phone telling him that i knew it wasnt him on the phone and that he was being really immature. well about five minutes later, he unblocks me and starts talking to me. of course he was being an ass at first, i know i deserve it though, im feeling every thing he felt for the longest time. then idk i guess things got better and he said this towards the end..
SouthernReb07: jenna, go to sleep, think about every day of those two years and wat i said and wat i did(the good things only) and then tell me tomorrow that i dont mean that
pinktequiliacuti: if you mean it then why are you doing this to me.. youre not wanting to talk to me, you wont let me explain anything to you, you dont want anything to do with me
SouthernReb07: i asked u to explain but u said u didnt want to but thats besides the point
SouthernReb07: deep down i kno i still love u but over time all my pain has built up and now ur seeing it
so i guess things are somewhat better, we're just going to have a really long, serious talk today, if he is still wanting to talk to me, and hopefully after i explain things, everything will be better, god knows i still love him so much. =/
but im going to get breakfast and then laying out until i hear from ryan.
blah, i hope this goes good.
SouthernReb07: jenna, go to sleep, think about every day of those two years and wat i said and wat i did(the good things only) and then tell me tomorrow that i dont mean that
pinktequiliacuti: if you mean it then why are you doing this to me.. youre not wanting to talk to me, you wont let me explain anything to you, you dont want anything to do with me
SouthernReb07: i asked u to explain but u said u didnt want to but thats besides the point
SouthernReb07: deep down i kno i still love u but over time all my pain has built up and now ur seeing it
so i guess things are somewhat better, we're just going to have a really long, serious talk today, if he is still wanting to talk to me, and hopefully after i explain things, everything will be better, god knows i still love him so much. =/
but im going to get breakfast and then laying out until i hear from ryan.
blah, i hope this goes good.