"No Mr. Bonds I expect you to die!"
Barry Bonds is ruining my life. Yes it's true. Well, at least my social life. For those of you who don't know, Barry Bonds is currently on track to break the career home run record (755 HR, held by Hank Aaron) sometime soon, probably in the next week or so. My boyfriend is supposed to go cover this event--Bonds hitting No. 756 and becoming the new home run champ. Okay, so how does this affect me?
August 10, 11, and 12 (Fri, Sat, and Sun) the Nationals will be in Phoenix playing the Diamondbacks. Mark's family lives in Phoenix, so I am planning to make the trip with him.
Now, let's say that Barry Bonds (my new best friend) has not broken the home run record yet, but is on track to break it that weekend (say he has tied it, which he will do as soon as he hits 2 more home runs--last week he did this in one game). In that case, I will not be going to Phoenix and neither will Mark. Instead, I will be going out with my girlfriends, and Mark will spend his birthday weekend watching Barry Bonds potentially break the home run record against Mark's beloved Pirates. Nightmare scenario. Of course, as I pointed out, Mark could also be spending his birthday weekend watching the Pirates crush the Giants. I don't think he sees my logic.
That's worst case scenario, here's another one: As things stand now, Mark is in Philly today and is scheduled go to New York on Friday and come home on Sunday.
If Best Friend Barry hits two homers at any point this week (bringing him up to No. 755), then Mark doesn't go to New York, he goes to San Fran to start following Mr. Bonds (or "Barroid") around until he hits No. 756, which could take who-knows-how-long. Of course, if Best Friend Barry doesn't hit 755 until this weekend, then instead of coming HOME on Sunday, Mark flies out to LA and then to San Diego to follow the Giants and Best Friend Barry, and then back to San Fran tomeets up with the Nats. I won't see him for three weeks (that's half of spring training, folks).
I tried to tell him that he shouldn't complain about two weeks in California, but again, he doesn't really see my logic. Wonderful boyfriend that he is, Mark says he would rather be home with me. Awww. I would rather be gallavanting around sunny California with him.
In an ideal world, Best Friend Barry will break the record against the Nats when they are in San Francisco and it won't disrupt Mark's work schedule at all, nor will it disrupt MY vacation plans (and really, isn't THAT what's important here?).
So thanks to you, Barry Bonds, I have no idea when I will next see my boyfriend, and no idea what plans to make for the next couple of weekends. In addition to everything else, this makes you suck even more.
August 10, 11, and 12 (Fri, Sat, and Sun) the Nationals will be in Phoenix playing the Diamondbacks. Mark's family lives in Phoenix, so I am planning to make the trip with him.
Now, let's say that Barry Bonds (my new best friend) has not broken the home run record yet, but is on track to break it that weekend (say he has tied it, which he will do as soon as he hits 2 more home runs--last week he did this in one game). In that case, I will not be going to Phoenix and neither will Mark. Instead, I will be going out with my girlfriends, and Mark will spend his birthday weekend watching Barry Bonds potentially break the home run record against Mark's beloved Pirates. Nightmare scenario. Of course, as I pointed out, Mark could also be spending his birthday weekend watching the Pirates crush the Giants. I don't think he sees my logic.
That's worst case scenario, here's another one: As things stand now, Mark is in Philly today and is scheduled go to New York on Friday and come home on Sunday.
If Best Friend Barry hits two homers at any point this week (bringing him up to No. 755), then Mark doesn't go to New York, he goes to San Fran to start following Mr. Bonds (or "Barroid") around until he hits No. 756, which could take who-knows-how-long. Of course, if Best Friend Barry doesn't hit 755 until this weekend, then instead of coming HOME on Sunday, Mark flies out to LA and then to San Diego to follow the Giants and Best Friend Barry, and then back to San Fran tomeets up with the Nats. I won't see him for three weeks (that's half of spring training, folks).
I tried to tell him that he shouldn't complain about two weeks in California, but again, he doesn't really see my logic. Wonderful boyfriend that he is, Mark says he would rather be home with me. Awww. I would rather be gallavanting around sunny California with him.
In an ideal world, Best Friend Barry will break the record against the Nats when they are in San Francisco and it won't disrupt Mark's work schedule at all, nor will it disrupt MY vacation plans (and really, isn't THAT what's important here?).
So thanks to you, Barry Bonds, I have no idea when I will next see my boyfriend, and no idea what plans to make for the next couple of weekends. In addition to everything else, this makes you suck even more.