Race for the Cure -- Busy Week! (Marilyn is THE BOSS)

Sep 13, 2003 01:18



My sister Marilyn mistressmarilyn (whom I live with), my friend and neighbor June and I are participating in our local Komen 'Race for the Cure' this coming Sunday. We'll be taking part in the women's 5k walk.

I've never done anything 'organized' like this before. But Marilyn's done several walks/runs. I'm personally very excited!

Marilyn's been very busy at work this week. Her first week assuming the role of 'boss' for her organization -- her former boss has 'moved on.'

Today she managed to work a nine hour day. But the rest of the week was all ten hour days without a break. (sigh)

But she's hanging in really well -- and I'm very proud of her. Still, it's a tough thing and I'm glad the weekend is here and she can have a few days away from the office.

I went in and helped out on Thursday, working on the upcoming auction. I'm pretty pleased with the way I helped organize the items. It went well. By the end of the day both Marilyn and Jenny were helping me out -- the three of us worked until around 7 p.m. A long and tiring day, but very satisfying.

Today June and I headed over to the Convention Center to pick up our bibs, t-shirts and commenorative pins for the event on Sunday. They were having a Health Expo in connection with the event. Originally this morning June sounded totally disinterested in attending the expo. She was all for just picking up our stuff and leaving. (This via a phone call.) I decided not to argue, seeing as she would be driving us there. But I've been to other such pre-race events with Marilyn and was feeling rather disappointed we were going to miss out on all the free goodies and interactions with others!

I had the feeling that June didn't want to go at all. I told her she could certainly pick up her things on the event day at the race, but that I was going over today regardless. (With an estimated 10,000 participants, I wasn't about to try and get our packets on Sunday!) She wasn't too thrilled with that idea, so over we went.

And naturally when we got there and she saw all the fun and freebies, she was all over it! (smile) Yes, June loves freebies! So we were there for hours and it was me finally encouraging her to leave. (Irony, thy name is June...)

Marilyn and I are walking so we can wear Patsy's name. She's our sister Sue's best friend who is currently in treatment for breast cancer. Sue went with Patsy to her chemo treatment yesterday. It didn't go well. They had to give her some kind of medication to 'boost' her blood, I guess. A few years back they'd have had to put her in isolation in the hospital to avoid infection, so I guess it's not as bad as it sounds -- even though the shot cost a couple grand. (I think Sue said it was covered, but Patsy has no insurance so every single treatment is an issue.)

Sue's been amazing with Patsy. An incredible support. I'm really proud of her.

Especially considering Sue has quite a few issues of her own right now...

More About Sue

Sue's own health is pretty suspect right now. She's overweight. She has diabetes. High blood pressure. A spot on her lung. Now she has kidney problems. On and on.

Her daughter (our niece) Candy has been living with her -- along with her daughter, Nicole -- for two years now. Candy left her husband and moved in with Sue who has a nice -- if somewhat small -- mobile home on a spot right by the river. Certainly not a house designed for three! Sue's former exercise-room-slash-office is now Nicole's bedroom, complete with canopy bed and a billion toys! (smile)

The guest room is now Candy's room. The front room -- with Sue's beloved large-screen TV -- has been, for the most part, taken over by both Candy and Nicole. Generally there are children's movies or cartoons blaring every time I'm there. (And I do mean blaring.) Toys take up a large corner or two of the living room. The dining room has Nicole's fairly large children's kitchen in one corner. And several other large toys in another corner. Oh. And their cat has also taken over the house. (grin)

Anyway, Sue has a hard time dealing with her two kids, but I'll save son Larry for another entry! Candy has been having some 'issues' recently -- and her temper appears entirely out of control. I was over at the house on Monday and heard for myself how she's taken to yelling at Nicole -- and cursing at her. (Not cursing around her, mind you. She'll call Nicole a 'fucking brat' right to her face!)

Don't get me wrong here. I'm not angry that she's cursing. I've always cursed in front of the kids to some degree and made a point of telling them that this is a case of 'I'm an adult, you're a child' -- meaning I can do certain things they cannot. (Hell, my personal feeling is that they can't start learning early enough that the world is not a fair place -- and that they will always be up against double standards. And, yeah, I go through times where I don't curse at all. And other times when I curse more often. I'm in a 'barely ever cursing' stage, myself, right now. But, again, it's not about the fact that Candy's cursing.)

There are all kinds of abuse. To me, yelling at kids is abuse. I've cared for kids many, many times in my life. I rarely ever raised my voice to them. I can't recall ever yelling at them! And I never cursed at them.

Yes, I did swat them on the butt when they were bad. I'm talking with them standing beside me -- and not hitting them hard. It was more a way of getting their attention -- and only done in extreme situations.

I'm more of a 'time out' punishment person. I remember how much it used to hurt as a kid to be sent to my room to miss my favorite cartoon show, for example!

Sue's been an amazing grandmother in many ways. But she's not good at discipline. Never was. She either gets angry and flies off the handle -- or relents and doesn't stick with punishments. Respect is hard to get under those circumstances.

But she spends more time with Nicole than Candy does. And because they're all living in Sue's house--and Sue's very active in helping raise Nicole -- I think she should have some say in how Nicole is raised.

She made the mistake of speaking up and telling Candy that she needed some anger control management. Candy told her, "You need to stay out of our business, old woman."

When I told Marilyn that she said Sue needed to kick Candy's ass out. Maybe not for real, but for a few days -- to let her think about what it would be like to try going it on her own!

Sue admitted that much of her problems with Candy and Larry are her own fault -- which is true, actually. But my, how they've both managed to rewrite their childhood! I'll have to tackle that in another entry. (smile)

Anyway, Sue saw her doctor today and asked him to put her on medication for her depression, which he did. Sad.

How'd I get off on all that? I guess it's because I've become Sue's main 'support system' in life. Which is interesting, considering she and I were never as close as she and Marilyn were -- until these last few years.

Oh. Not close the way Marilyn and I are with one another, of course! (So many people have resented how close Marilyn and I are, by the way. But I digress!)

Anyway, I was the middle child. Actually, I understand why Sue has often treated me less-than-nice over the years. First she was forced to give up the limelight to me when I was born -- she was nine at the time, turning ten two months later. Then she was forced to babysit me all the time when I was a baby and toddler. (Can you say resentment?)

Then two years later along came sweet little Marilyn -- the apple of Sue's eye. (And mine, too!) And, frankly, Sue favored her from there on out. And the funny thing is that I've never resented it, because I also adore my sister Marilyn. This inequity was always just a fact of life. No big deal. But now we're suddenly quite close -- and I have to admit it's just a little ironic. (grin)

Why we expect either parents or siblings to treat each person equally I've no clue, anyway. How unrealistic can we be?

Anyway, got tons of wonderful goodies at the Expo. It was a terrific experience being in that room full almost entirely of women! (Yes, there were some men, too. But it was probably 90% women.) There was this feeling of... affirmation, I guess.

And I'm so outgoing (almost outrageously so) that I always have a good time when I can mingle and interact with others, of either gender.

I love talking to people. I can get close to total strangers within minutes of meeting them.

It's an interesting thing, in light of how shy I was as a child/youth. No one can ever believe that if I (or someone else) tells them that these days. It would be like telling them the sun revolves around the earth, or something. (smile)

Thursday I went over to the Honeybaked Ham restaurant in John's Landing near Marilyn's office to get a salad. I've only been there perhaps four times, total, but the woman who works in the kitchen area making the sandwiches always remembers me and makes a point to try and talk to me, in her broken English. Thursday she was working on another order, so she made the fellow who was making my salad go back and add more cheese to my Caesar salad. (smile) It's so sweet and touching. Imagine being able to have that kind of impact on someone, just by being friendly and talking warmly to them? Sometimes I'm amazed by it.

But for the most part I just love other people. (In spite of the 'stinkers' who are out there.) I love that moment of interaction. It's difficult to put into words how I feel, I guess...

This is now too long for words! Sorry! I'm stopping.

More about the Race later. I can't wait! (And I didn't even share the things I bought yet!)

(grin)

september-2003, marilyn, patsy, walking, 2003, june, sister-sue

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