AA: Day Four
Title: Trauma
Prompt: Day 4
Triggers: Car crash, end of the world stuff etc.
AN: A continuation of sorts of my ficathon piece “An Evening”. It concentrates on Mina crashing the Rolls Royce. Don’t worry if you haven’t read it, you don’t need to, but if you have, there are a few inconsistencies because I was trying to disguise my identity in the ficathon and I didn’t want to give too much away. Basically these are the Hooligans characters after Hooligans.
Her ears weren’t ringing, there was no feeling of them being stuffed with cotton, her hearing was in no way damaged. Mina wasn’t sure whether it was because their laws now dictated that music be played below a certain decibel or whether it was her body’s superhuman ability to repair itself. The second option left a bitter taste in the back of her throat, bile spreading upwards. All their power within and still she had failed. Her breath hitched hard in her throat and her hand reached up to cover her neck, as if to push the threatening sob back down into her heart. Her fingers closed around her windpipe and clawed their way to the suprasternal notch, trailing pink scores down her neck until it reached the hollow. Her stomach suddenly lined itself with leaden ice. Without a second’s thought she twisted herself, wrapping her body around the front seat and ignoring the auto-pilot warning to remain seated and secure at all times in the moving vehicle. She searched briefly in the gloom of the backseat for her purse. When she found it, shimmering and dark on the floor, she sat herself back into the driver’s seat and began frantically dumping its contents onto the chair next to her, her eyes, wide with worry, skimming desperately over its contents and her whole body shaking. Fuck, the word screamed through her mind and repeated itself over and over, like a prayer for help, until her frenzied hands finally touched a cold, thin chain of gold. She calmed instantly and lifted it, the heavy weight of a large golden heart locket dangling like a pendulum at the bottom. She didn’t open it, choosing instead to clutch it to her heart, closing her eyes and biting her lip, silencing all the sound of her sorrow as she cried out heavy tears.
The crystal paradise outside her window sped past in blurs of light and reflection, shimmering with the colours of the rainbow, but all she saw was the dark abyss behind her eyelids and the hateful and cherished memories it brought with it. When she could take no more of it, when their faces began to focus too clearly in her mind, their features contorting too vividly with fear and despair, her eyes snapped open and they faded to the background.
It was the alcohol in her system which made her weak, no doubt. Minako had never been one to cry; unlike the Queen - when she had been known as just Usagi and even now in the privacy of her chambers or in the company of her friends - who wept at the drop of a hat, Minako had never been able to shed tears easily. It was her one bane as an actress.
She looked down and noticed that her shag for the night had torn her dress. The gold sequence glittered up at her with a gash from the hem up to her mid-thigh, threads of white cloth from the underlayer showing through, parting to reveal the smooth skin underneath. She cursed as she wiped her eyes with the back of her hand, giving up on caring about the state of her appearance; her makeup had been smudged long before she had left the third night club and tumbled drunkenly into her husband’s pride and joy, stolen for a night of oblivion and defiance.
He would do nothing, of course, when he found out. He would fume internally and she would rub salt into his wound, deeper and deeper, until he couldn’t take it anymore. Then and only then would some poor soul face his wrath. It would be simpler to yell and rant, but Ceithin was not a simple man. Some were fired for minor mistakes, and they were lucky. Most would be humiliated somehow, usually in public, or roared at into fearful submission. Ceithin held the power to make or destroy a person’s livelihood with a sentence from his lips, his influence second only to the Royal Couple’s. Hers, one the other hand... she scoffed at the thought.
Others would suffer for Mina’s actions, but not her, Ceithin never gave her the decency of actually blaming her for her own irresponsibility, for her own weaknesses. He never confronted her, he knew he could not. He knew what would happen if he did. He feared that fight as much as she sought for it, but even so, she was the bigger coward. No, she thought, I am the only coward.
This life had ruined her, fate’s blows too cruel. She could not see ahead of her, her world filtered through an unfocused haze of salted water and memories as the dam which reigned in her tears broke again, letting loose a torrent.
In one moment Ceithin had burdened himself with her duty, he had stolen the role that should have been hers, rescued her from her terrible destiny. Ceithin had done what she could not. He had destroyed the world and he had saved it, and in doing so he became a monster and a saviour all at once.The worst of it was she admired him for what he had done. She loved him more than she thought possible for his devotion, for his strength, for his ability to bear his burden. She could never be like him, she had proven it time and again.
She gave him nothing but her contempt and her hate, her righteous fury ever brimming on the surface, yet he never allowed her an excuse to release it and each time he denied her, she found herself more grateful than the last. To face him would be to face her own inaction and it would break him with the atrocity he committed. Yet still she wanted it. She wanted to be allowed to scream at him, to tell him how much she hated him for what he had done, and maybe... maybe start to feel better. For now she was trapped, caught between her pain and guilt and anger. The cycle crumbled everything she touched, it was turning Ceithin cold and cruel, burdened already as he was with his crimes. Slowly it was happening but she could see it nonetheless, the more she toyed with him, taunted him with the threat of openly blaming him for what he had done, the deeper he was receding into himself. He was becoming Kunzite again.
“Sensing high levels of stress and/or anxiety, do you require medical assistance?”
The voice which pierced through her thoughts belonged to one of Zach’s ‘primary research assistants’ and was now the standard for every auto-pilot system in the country. A long-legged, skinny brunette with an all too fake, eager-to-please smile. She was already despised by the Senshi for having flaunted her relationship with her superior so publicly, but at that moment if she were in the car with Mina, the Senshi would have ripped out the woman’s voice box.
“Just take me home!” she snapped.
“Continuing on to current destination. Crystal Palace, twenty seven point four five kilometres remaining. Please remain seated at all times while the vehicle is in motion.”
Mina was about to smash her fist into the screen on the dashboard, but thought better of it. She had no clue how the vehicle worked, for all she knew, breaking the computer could halt the car. An involuntarily image of a disapproving glare from her husband floated through her agitated mind and her mood suddenly deflated from anger back to its original sense of misery. Ceithin blamed her for his own guilt and hated her, that she knew, but he could not help that he loved her more than it was meant to be possible for a man to feel. It was for that reason, not the disaster of their dying world, which caused him to grip Usagi’s shoulders at that crucial moment. Borne out of the love he held for Minako, he spared her the agony of forcing the annihilation of billions, the deaths of a precious few, in order to save what was now left of humanity.
It was Ceithin who took a hold on Usagi, amid the screams of the dying and the great roars and cracks of the Earth falling apart, of people and animals and machines being swallowed into the giant fizzures of concrete and metal. Towering structures quivering and tumbling down around them, crushing the fearful, hapless ants underneath. It was Ceithin who made her Princess command the use of the mighty Sailor Saturn.
It was Ceithin who took everything from her.
In so many ways, death would have been the better option, but he was much too strong for that, and apparently he had thought that she was too. He was wrong, and she would prove it. “Rolls two zerro zerro three, disable auto-pilot, engage manual.” She sniffed heavily and rubbed the impending tears away, composing herself enough to sit up straight and grip the steering wheel, the golden locket wrapped tightly in her hand. That was something she would never let go of. The determination of the Soldier of Venus had taken over and her eyes froze to the colour of Arctic blue.
Zach’s lackey reared her ugly head again. “Warning, auto-pilot is designed for a safer driving experience, manual drive should only be used in cases of extreme emergency. Are you sure you want to disab-”
“Engage the fucking manual drive!” Mina’s fury doubled.
“Auto-pilot disabled. Manual drive enabled. Please drive cautiously and obey road safety regulations.”
As if to deliberately spite the temerity of the vehicle’s computer system, Mina’s golden-stemmed foot pushed the pedal flush into the floor.
The Rolls Phantom was a smooth ride, even with over five hundred years on it. It was Ceithin’s, so it came as no surprise. He’d never actually worked on it himself, but no expense had been spared to restore it - parts were terribly hard to come by, especially for a petrol engine. The leather was real too, although how he managed that was a mystery - one of another million other things about him that Minako had yet to solve.
She indicated left and the invis opened a hole which followed her car, running parallel with it. She eyed the opening, a gap in what was otherwise just a mutli-coloured sheen which gleamed like the skin of a soap bubble in between lanes. It was an invention from Zach’s own mind, created to complement the auto-piloting system, although the design itself had come from Zach’s many followers, the hateful voice most likely being one of them. They’d done something with the crystal, creating force fields which separated lanes, ensuring that cars could not swerve into others if there was a malfunction with the auto-drive. The gap kept following her as the Rolls Royce sped onwards through the empty night’s road, Crys T was not known for its traffic jams and even if it had been, Ceithin’s was a Palace Vehicle, the auto-pilot system on all other cars were programmed to move them out of its way.
It became a horrible game to Mina, she shifted gears into fourth, and then to fifth, trying ridiculously to beat the system, to outpace the gap. How fast she went she had no idea, her concentration was on the road ahead, on the hole in the shimmering wall to her left. A Rolls Royce was not a car designed for speed, even the Phantom, but she pushed it anyway, the hum of the engine turning to a soft growl as it raced along the smooth black strip ahead of her. She opened the windows and the wind roared through her hair, whipping it up into a hysterical, tangled mass of liquid gold.
The auto-pilot said something, what it was Mina had no idea, the whore’s patronising blissfully drowned out by the cacophony of the engine noise and the crashing, freezing gale of the night. The necklace in her hand was warm but the chain, wrapped so tightly around her hand, bit into her fingers, making them throb and swell from lack of blood flow. She didn’t care. All she saw was the gap alongside her. Her destiny riding with her, inescapable, a hole in her heart. She couldn’t beat it, she hadn’t beaten it.
She was furious. At Ceithin, at the world, at herself. Her eyes spilt painful tears as the wind blasted her face, its iciness biting at her ears and cheeks and nose. Her head began to pound and the noise was deafening. The world swept past her, building after building after crystaline building. Their beautiful future mocking her cruelly.
She had indicated left, she gritted her teeth and swerved right instead, careening into the closed invisible barrier at full speed.
The car crumpled on impact and rolled, twice, three, four times before breaking through the invis and skidding along the pavement until its path was brought abruptly to a halt by a light pole, the Rolls upside down and steaming, its broken body having trailed in pieces behind it.
~*~
“Hold on, Mina,” Ami was staring intently at the fuzzy black and white image on the screen, one hand on the keypad of the monitor, the other holding the ultrasound transducer upright on Mina’s swollen belly. With a soft click she froze the image and peered closer.
“What is it?” Mina asked, a mixture of impatience and anticipation. She looked at Ceithin, as if to make sure he was still alright with her asking that question, and then darted back to the screen when he’d answered her with a small smile. She tightened her grip on his hand.
When Ami finally pulled away from the monitor she turned to face the couple with the brightest smile either of them had ever seen her give.
“It’s a girl, isn’t it?” Mina beamed. “I knew it,” she said as she looked at Ceithin again, her expression a combination of smugness and elation, “I knew it. Pay up.”
Ceithin almost seemed worried. “A... girl...” His grey eyes were clouded over in thought as his eyebrows furrowed. Boys were easy to handle. Play some sports, have a few meaningful discussions about the world and women and they could pretty much get on with the rest themselves. But a girl... images flashed through his brain of beating back hordes of horny men with baseball bats and golf clubs, of doing feminine hygiene product runs, attempting to navigate through minefield after minefield of complex emotions, endless discussions about fashion models, training bras and shopping for shoes. It downright terrified him. “A girl...” What was he going to do with a girl?
And then he looked down into Mina’s slightly plumper, glowing face. She was beautiful, even with swollen ankles, weird cravings and the look of superiority for being right radiating from her wonderful face. She was a miracle, she was the strongest person he’s ever known, and he knew that no matter what, as long as she was with him, he could have a hundred girls and he would be fine. They would do it together... and of course, he had back up. The reassurance relaxed him significantly - this was not a Shitennou duty, he did not mind making mistakes, especially since he knew that there would always be someone there who could fix a problem he could not - the child would have nine aunts (one of them biological - his sister), four of which already had experience raising a child; two grandmothers; two grandfathers; and at least four uncles. “This is one bet that I don’t mind losing.” He reached into his pocket with his free hand and pulled out a note, handing it to her while he kissed her soft palm. Finally, after so very long Mina and Ceithin - Venus and Kunzite - could really have something of themselves, for themselves, without feeling it was somehow taking away from their duties to their lieges. They were going to have a baby girl.
“I wouldn’t say that just yet.” Ami’s smile had not moved from her pretty features.
Both Mina’s and Ceithin’s faces shot up and stared at Ami with confusion.
“It’s a boy?” Ceithin asked, hope, unavoidable hope, sneaking into his voice.
Ami’s smile never wavered. “It’s both,” she said.
For one terrible moment Mina was filled with horror. “It’s a hermaphrodite?!”
Ami placed her forehead into her hand with exasperation. “It’s twins, Mina. Twins” she said, unable to understand how someone who’d once led entire armies into battle could truly be such a loveable ditz.
All colour drained from Ceithin’s face.
Mina was laughing so hard she began to cry.
~*~
Makoto was weeping openly, clutching onto Noel as if her very life depended on it. He in turn held her tightly, shushing her with soft sounds and stroking her hair, hoping it would help her pain, but to no avail. “Mortal...” she whispered, “they’re mortal.”
Usagi had glassy eyes and was looking down, as if she were somehow ashamed.
Mamoru rose from his seat, letting go of his wife’s hand to make his way over to his lead guardian. He stared into Ceithin’s eyes, “I’m so sorry,” he said firmly, genuinely. “I wish there was something I could do.”
“There’s still a chance-” Usagi started, her unwavering optimism rearing its ugly head, “Just because they won’t have superpowers doesn’t mean that they’ll...” she trailed off, unable to bring herself to say the words. “Maybe the Crystal will grant them a longer life! I mean, we’re not exactly going to live forever either, right? We’re not really immortal. We don’t know how long they’re going to live for, they’re just babies! Maybe they’ll live for hundreds and hundreds of years!” Her gaze was flittering between Ami, Zach, Rei and Noel, hoping that one of them, any of them, scientist or seer, would pipe up and back her theory. She avoided looking at either Mina or Ceithin at all costs, each of them clutching a swaddle of cloth, sleeping bundles - one of blue and one of pink. Ceithin’s face was too hard and impassive for Usagi to feel comfortable with. When his features set themselves in that certain way she was almost afraid of him, as if he were some horrible statue of stone. But as frightened of Ceithin as she was, her fear for Mina’s well-being was tenfold. The blonde, so usually full of expression - whether happiness, giddiness or resolute determination - was as closed off as her husband. Usagi had no clue as to what Minako was thinking and she hated it as much as she hated thunderstorms.
“Usagi, even if they did, they will not have the same strength and protection that we do, there’s-” Zach hesitated to say it in front of the new parents. Ceithin’s eyes flicked onto his green ones, forcing him to continue what he’d started, pulling the full truth reluctantly out of him. “There’s no certainty that they will survive the Freeze when it arrives. They’re just as likely to die as everyone else on the planet.”
“A five percent chance,” Ceithin’s voice was grave, uncracked and solid, the complete opposite of the raging fear within him. He looked up at Ami, “That’s what you said, isn’t it? One in twenty will survive the Freeze.”
Makoto’s muffled sobs increased in volume and Noel closed his arms around her tighter.
Jared sighed heavily, “Look, this disaster isn’t going to happen for a while, half a century at least, we’ve established that. Just because these children are going to havenormal lives doesn’t mean they can’t be happy ones. It doesn’t mean that Airi and Owain won’t grow up being loved and adored by their mom and dad, and spoilt rotten by their aunts and uncles. We knew we were going to lose loved ones, the Freeze isn’t something which is going to catch us by surprise. We all have family we’re going to lose, Noel has a brother, my niece and neph-” he stopped suddenly at Rei’s gentle touch to his arm and noticed her lilac eyes flit over to Usagi, who was looking as if she were to blame for everything.
“I’m sorry for all of those other people, Jared, but the Freeze cannot get these children,” Mina’s voice was as cold as her icy blue eyes. At that moment it was plain to see that she did not care about Jared’s family, or Noel’s or anyone else’s. She was a mother now, she had become more selfish. There was Usagi and there were her children to keep safe, everyone else would be regrettable collateral damage. “It will not,” she stated with finality.
Mina didn’t see it, but Ceithin looked over to her, and his eyes hardened like pieces of granite in the face of her statement of certainty. There was something changing in him, Usagi felt it as plain as day. She didn’t know what it was, she didn’t know what would happen, but it made her incredibly sad.
They were meant to have a palace full of children and grandchildren and great grandchildren. Chibi-Usa was supposed to have an innumerable amount of brothers, sisters, cousins, nieces, nephews... in Usagi’s mind the Crystal Palace wasn’t going to be a palace at all. She’d planned that it would be like a big community centre, full of vibrancy and families, Mina’s and Ceithin’s brood being completely indistinguishable from Rei’s and Jared’s or Mako’s and Noel’s or Ami’s and Zach’s. She’d laughed about it to herself in her dreams: they wouldn’t be a futuristic monarchy, they were going to be a big bunch of magical hippies. That’s what she had wanted. Happy friends and laughing voices echoing through the crystalline walls.
How very silly of her. How ridiculously childish. That was not how the world worked.
She began to cry too.
~*~
His eyes shot open on instinct, his senses having picked up the other conscious person in the room. He could feel her, standing close by and not sleeping warmly next to him. He sighed, rubbed at his eyes briefly and then glanced at the alarm on the bedside table. It was too early in the morning to be awake, barely past midnight. The twins wouldn’t wake for a good four hours to feed - that was one mercy they provided their parents, they ate like clockwork. Mina had joked they’d probably gotten their impeccable timekeeping from him.
He rose from the bed and padded softly to her lithe form, deceptively small as she leaned over the wooden crib at the foot of the bed. Wrapping his arms around her, he settled the back of her blonde head in the crook of his neck. “Can’t sleep?” he asked quietly, looking over his wife to the objects of her scrutiny: the two tiny sleeping babies, nestled together below in a prison of crib bumpers, rail covers and Sesame Street themed mobiles.
He could feel the tension coursing through Mina’s body, her muscles taut and awkward, and for a moment she didn’t quite fit into his arms. “Relax,” he whispered into her hair, “they’re still breathing, they’re still here. Nothing is going to happen to them. Not on my watch.”
There was a sharp intake of breath and then her whole body fell into place. She felt heavy, as if it was more a sense of resignation than relief. “I saw an article today in a magazine,” she mumbled, her voice tired, “about Hair Tourniquet Syndrome.” She could feel his chin roll lightly on her crown, an indication that he had tilted his head to look at her. Mirroring his action she lifted her eyes to meet his, the moonlight illuminating them in the gloom. “Adult hair is surprisingly strong, it can wrap around their fingers and toes, cutting the skin and causing severe swelling and blisters. It’s agonising, it can even lead to amputation.” She could tell he had lifted his eyebrows and she sighed, turning back to stare at Airi and Owain.
“You’re checking to see if they have hair in between their toes?” There was a hint of worry in his voice, “They’re not in pain, Mina. They’re resting, like you should be.”
She shook her head and he could feel the shift on his collar bone. “That’s not why I’m awake, I couldn’t give a damn about Hair Tourniquet Syndrome.”
Her voice didn’t shake, there were no tears, but Ceithin could feel the nerves, the agitation.
“I’m not afraid of accidentally dropping them, I’m not worried about colic, or cot death, or meningitis or choking. I don’t spend all night awake debating the pros and cons of whether they should get the MMR vaccination. All I keep thinking about is-” she couldn’t continue her voice cracking. Still, the tears would not come.
“It’ll be alright,” he said, his tone definite as his fingers slid over her bare arms with reassurance.
She didn’t notice any of it. “Ceithin, I should be terrified about those things. I should be standing here checking their toes for hair.” She sounded like she was in disbelief, “Instead, all I can do is think about when they’re older and the world kills them as if they’re nothing but forgettable extras in some cheesy disaster film.” She stretched out her arm, her hand open wide as if to touch them, but she pulled away, thinking better of it, fearing she would wake them. “What's the point in worrying about those things? When no matter what we do to protect them they’re going to die anyway?” Ceithin swallowed heavily, a sign that what she'd said had struck a nerve, although she wouldn’t have been able to tell if she hadn’t felt it through his skin, her back pressed to his chest. He was so good at hiding himself away, of taking all his fears and tucking them deep into a spot where they could never be seen by others, just so he could keep moving forward. She wished she had that talent. “I just... I feel so helpless. I’m letting them down.” She did touch them then, unable to resist, her fingers gently caressing the soft pale down of her son’s hair before shifting to trace their way along her daughter’s tiny bud of a nose. She couldn’t help the smile from spreading across her face and it was all she could do to stop herself from picking them up and holding them close.
“You’re a great mother, Mina.” She didn’t need to hear about how all people died eventually, that it was a childish fancy to wish for immortality, that everyone else had babies and raised them knowing they would one day perish, and sometimes not in the best of ways. For Mina this was as close as she could come to panic, she needed to be soothed, that was all. She may not have thought she had anything in common with regular new mothers, but in essence, she was exactly the same, she worried just like them, it was just unfortunate that her fears were founded and brutal. His plan of action came quickly, in the morning he would call Ami and ask her to have a talk with Mina about new mothers and anxiety, Mamoru had told him about that, it wasn’t much, but it was something. For now though, all she needed was for him to be there for her, to support her, like she did for Usagi and the others, and him. “These kids are luckiest things alive to have you.” He'd chosen his words deliberately. A subtle reminder that for now they lived and were happy, blissfully ignorant of the dangers their world posed.
Mina sighed and turned to face her husband. “What mother spends all her time wishing her children had never been born?”
Ceithin looked away from her to the crib, that familiar look of determination creeping onto his face, a small frown and a hardening of his eyes. The ones who are afraid. The Freeze would not get their children. He would not let Mina down.
~*~
He was deep into a report analysis when an annoyed huff pull away his attention. He looked up through the dull, yellow light of his desk lamp to find his wife dressed elegantly in a simple forest green dress, her lips a siren red, the colours evidently chosen to suit the time of year. She was leaning against the door frame, her arms crossed in an obvious show of displeasure.
“I can’t come. Tell them I’ll make it up to them,” he said simply and went back to his reading.
“Not good enough,” she stated firmly.
He looked up again and lifted his eyebrows as if he were somehow disappointed with her answer. “There’s a lot of work I need to do tonight, if I could make it, I would.”
She uncrossed her arms and strode into the office, snatching the piece of paper from his hands to read it. He sat back in his chair, as if he were letting a child misbehave in order to berate them for it once they were done. It infuriated her. Her ire was only aggravated by the contents of the report. She threw the sheet back at him, her sky coloured eyes blazing like a storm. “You’re missing your childrens’ first Christmas play to read about a few crazy monks prophesying about the end of the world?”
“Rei sent it herself. Their predictions appear to be quite accurate.”
“Rei is coming to the play!”
“Good for her,” Ceithin sighed, frustrated that Mina didn’t seem to understand. It was not as if he wanted to miss Airi and Owain singing their hearts out to ‘When Santa Got Stuck Up the Chimney’, but if missing a few cute moments meant finding a way to stop the Freeze without having to seal everything in raw, uncontainable power then it was a sacrifice he had to make. This was not something they could play around with, the Earth was changing, already it could be seen. If Makoto’s investigations truly indicated what they appeared to be then time was running out. Yet using the Crystal would have severe consequences, not just for the population but for the existence of the Earth itself. Whether through its own natural process or through Usagi’s magic, the planet would become inhospitable. They had realised that in order for the Crystal to save the world, they would have to kill it first and then rebuild it, as the other planets had been during the beginning of the Silver Millennium. It was the oldest of magic and by the end of it Usagi’s power would reign supreme, with the fate of the Earth depending on the gift in her possession, taking guardianship away from Mamoru. That thought didn’t scare him nearly so much as it once would have, it was no longer about the Moon and the Earth, it was about saving what they could. So many people were going to die, his children were going to suffer. He needed to find a way to safeguard their future. “I have to read this report.”
“Ceithin, it’s not like we don’t know it’s coming, what’s so new about what these monks are saying?”
“They think it’ll happen in the next century, we could have more time.”
Mina’s lips pressed themselves into a firm line. “More time for what? Owain and Airi aren’t going to get a longer childhood just because the world might try and explode a little later than scheduled. You can spare an hour.”
“I can’t.”
“Cut the bullshit!” she yelled. “You know damn well why you refuse to come and it’s cowardly!”
He stood up at that, slowly, deliberately, his knuckles pressing on the table and supporting him as he leaned forward. “What the hell is that supposed to mean?”
Mina boldly went on. “You don’t want to go! You don’t want to make these kinds of memories because you don’t want the pain of remembering when they’re gone.”
Ceithin stood back from the desk and frowned, like he was listening to nonsense. “Don’t be ridiculous.” He sat himself back down and began reading the report.
“You’re going to miss these things later on, whether it’s by the Freeze or from age-” she swallowed down the heavy lump which built in her throat at the thought, forcing the tears back from her stinging eyes “-your memories will be all you’ll have left of them.”
He looked up at that, furious that she was upsetting herself and even more angry at her implication. “Mina, I am not trying to avoid my children. Everything I do, I do for them. None of us has taken a break since they were born. Usagi spends fourteen hours a day locked in the lab with Ami and Zach trying to figure out how to control that fucking Crystal! Noel and Jared spend every waking minute struggling to fund this operation, Mako’s all but been banished to places where rats and cockroaches have problems surviving and Mamoru has not been seen corporally since he travelled into Elysion two years ago! I barely sleep, this work is my life. What more can I do?”
“You can stop trying to save them from the inevitable.” She shook her head in disappoint. “They’re mortal, appreciate what time they have left.”
“In case you need reminding, Mina, over six billion people are going to die as well.”
“Owain and Airi will be the only ones you’ll regret losing.” With that she stalked out of his den.
He sat back defeated, wondering when and how his and Mina’s views had swapped so dramatically. She had apparently accepted that they were going to lose their children; Ceithin wasn’t sure it was something to be happy about. It changed nothing. He’d made a promise to himself that he would protect them, that he would keep his family safe from the Freeze. Mina may have given up, but he most certainly would not.
But that didn’t mean that she didn’t have a valid point.
Ceithin sighed, rubbing his face with his hands and then tossing the paper back onto the central mound of documents cluttering his desk. He stood and grabbed his jacket from the back of his chair. “Mina,” he called out as he made his way out, switching off the small lamp as he went. “Wait, I’m coming with you.”
~*~
Mina’s eyebrows lifted and a playful smile graced her face as she eyed her husband’s usually steady hands. He was dressed impeccably, as always, the silver tie highlighting the colour of his stern eyes. Ceithin seemed incapable of adjusting the knot correctly. He was frowning at himself in the mirror, as if his disapproval could somehow convince the tie to fix itself.
“Let me,” Mina offered as she made her way towards him, the dupioni silk of her champagne dress rustling ever so softly as she moved.
“It’s alright,” he practically growled out, his frustration aimed at the long piece of cloth draped around his neck.
She gave him a warm smile at that, ignoring his denial she shrugged off her gold lace bolero jacket so as not to wrinkle it while she worked. As she gently pried his hands away and began to undo his tie, she noticed that his frown softened as he stared beyond her to their reflection. "Are you checking me out?" she asked, knowing the answer.
He looked down to meet her eyes, his gaze practically having to tearing itself away from the the view in the mirror. "It's a beautiful dress."
She flipped the tie over, the soft material fanning its way across their vision for a spilt moment. "I know," she said, leaning in closer, "that's why I chose it."
"Everyone will be watching you."
"Everyone will be watching the Airi," she corrected. "Besides, I'm an old woman, it would be kind of gross for people to be staring at the mother of the bride when we have a wedding full of hot, young blood."
"You're not old," he stated, unwilling to let her divulge in the fantasy, "you don't look a day over twenty eight," and you never will... he didn't have the heart to say the last part, not right then, on what was meant to be one of their happiest days, a celebration of their daughter's new life.
It was not as if she didn't know anyway. She stood back, disguising the move as if she were admiring her handiwork, and did her best to keep her voice level. "As long as I still have you staring, then it's all I'll ever need."
She moved towards him again when he seemed to struggle with adjusting the white rose into the button hole of his lapel. Smiling as she plucked the flower from his hands she asked, “Were you like this for our wedding?”
His answer was simple and immediate, although not without affection. “No.”
She could feel his breath on her forehead, the soft air caressing the bridge of her nose. “Were you worse?” she teased.
He lifted his arms and cupped her hands into his larger ones, sliding the pad of his thumb over the light sheen of her nails as he pulled her fingers away from his jacket. “You’re the other half of me, Mina, without you I’d never be whole.” His eyes held her firmly in place, his rare speech of open affection stilling her like a spell. The emotion of the day was getting to him, he knew it, but at that moment his pride in her and his gratitude kept him talking. “I had made the mistake of not choosing you before. I was alone with only my responsibility to Endymion and it made me a bitter, cold man. I wasn’t going to make that mistake in this life." He pulled out a chain from his pocket then, a golden heart shaped locket dangling from the end. "You don't have to put it on now, I know this ensemble you're wearing took weeks to plan, but I thought it would be something you'd like to have." He placed the gift into her hands and basked in the glow of her grateful smile when she opened it.
"You know me better than anyone else," she said.
"When I find myself losing my way you always bring me back, you keep me strong. The day I married you there was nothing for me to be afraid of.”
“I felt the very same thing,” she whispered. “If it wasn't going to ruin my make up I'd kiss you.”
Ceithin's eyes scanned her, sliding over her face, along the curve of her neck and downwards, a small smile slipping onto his lips. “The reception ends at six to tonight and I'm not meeting Mamoru until eleven thirty tomorrow,” his voice was low, his suggestion heavy.
“Dad, please!” Owain had popped his blond head through the door and was looking at his parents with a face of mild disgust. “That's my mother you're trying to-” he stopped himself from continuing at the look he received from his father. “You're right, I don't even want to finish that sentence. You're both in your fifties, you’re too old to make more babies.”
Ceithin glared at his son as Mina continued to fiddle with the final details of his suit. “Apparently you’re at the right age.”
Owain's blue eyes narrowed into a carbon copy of his father's glare. “Dad...” he started, his voice edged with warning.
“You barely know this girl.” It was a point he’d made several times before in the past few months, and Ceithin had no qualms about raising it again. “She could be lying to you, there’s no proof this child is yours.”
“She doesn’t care about our money, she loves me and I'm not shirking from my responsibilities.”
“Twenty three is too young to be a father.” Ceithin wanted to tell him so badly. Live, go out and have fun, forget about responsibility and duty and just enjoy your life. Don’t have children, my son, because it’s not going to last. He sighed, knowing that he had to calm himself, it would not do to be a wallowing mess, too many people would take advantage of it, and it was certainly not something he wanted his son, or worse, the groom to see. Ceithin had an image to uphold, especially to the man who had the audacity to marry his daughter.
“Airi is getting married today, in case you’d forgotten she’s the same age as me. Why am I too young and she isn't? That's sexist.”
“Airi is different. She’s been with Peter since they were sixteen,” Mina interrupted to prevent an argument from starting. “Enough now from the both of you. I need to make sure your aunts aren’t driving your sister insane, Usagi had been saying something about hairpins and YouTube." Both men smiled at the predictable torture Airi was most likely receiving at that very moment. "You can walk me to her room, your father needs some time alone,” Mina announced.
With a grateful smile Ceithin gave her a peck on her cheek, watching as she gracefully put on her bolero and then took their son’s arm. It could not be more obvious that Owain was Mina’s son, he had a fierce and extrovert passion for life, and a sense of duty as strong as his mother’s. While Airi was also the splitting image of her mother, she took on more of Ceithin’s temperament - calm, loyal and closed.
“I haven’t seen that look in a long time.” This time it was Mamoru who had interrupted his internal musing, the dark haired man’s piercing gaze reflecting a hint of amusement. “Nervous?”
Ceithin’s wasn’t afraid to admit that he was. “Very. I don’t trust him.”
Mamoru’s smile grew. “Then trust Airi. She’s a good judge of character, Peter's a good man.”
"I don't seem to have much of a choice in the matter, you should remember that for when Chibi-Usa comes along. Fathers get no say." Ceithin was fidgeting with his cuff links and did not notice the sudden dip in Mamoru's mood, the guilt-ridden drop of his eyes.
“I want this to be perfect for her," he continued, being unusually open about his fears, "she deserves to be happy.”
“It will be perfect.” Mamoru tried to think of something inspirational to say, like Ceithin could do so effortlessly for him. “You’ll be her rock when you walk her down the isle,” he managed to get out, and then moved on when he realised how silly it sounded. “For now though,” he said, tilting his head at the door, “you’re needed outside, Zach’s drunk a little too much and is being less than discreet with one of Peter’s attractive relatives in the rose garden.”
Ceithin’s eyes suddenly grew cold and Mamoru knew he’d made a mistake in telling him. He had hoped it would provoke some form of mild exasperation and provide a good opportunity to distract his friend, but it seemed that he’d miscalculated. With so much hanging over Mamoru's head, and with Ceithin acting so much more different than usual, it was hard to judge what the right thing to do and say was.
“It’s my daughter’s wedding,” he stated.
Mamoru could see he was angry. “Zach has always had trouble keeping it in his pants,” he said, trying to lighten the mood. “If we go divert his attention now no one will notice. I have Jared on distraction duty at the moment, but Ami's not going to be outsmarted by him for very long, she'll see through it and start looking for Zach soon.” He made to leave but Ceithin refused to move.
“Mamoru, what is going on?” His voice was bold when he asked, as if he was commanding an answer.
Mamoru swallowed, there were few people in the world who could make him feel like a fearful child. “What do you mean?”
“Zach doesn’t do things like this unless he’s upset. You said you wanted to see me tomorrow.” The pieces were falling together. “What is going on?” he repeated.
“Nothing-”
“What do you know?” Ceithin took in a deep breath, unwilling to let it go. He could not wait. Not for this. Not when he knew what was coming. "Please."
Mamoru let out a resigned sigh, his body suddenly becoming very tired. He gave up the pretence and indicated for his friend to take a seat. That day or the next, it didn't matter really when Ceithin would be told, the memory of his daughter's wedding would be tainted either way with an inesacapable bitterness. He'd just hoped to prolong his friend's happiness for just a little while longer but it appeared that such graces were not to be given. He struggled at first to say anything, but Ceithin, ever patient, waited unmoving until Mamoru could find the right words. “We’ve lost,” he said eventually. “It’s over.”
~*~
Ceithin was numb as he took Airi’s steady hand. He gave her his best smile and he stood as solidly as he had always done. He was the father she needed him to be, the man she loved with all her innocent and youthful heart. He had stared at her with eyes apparently full of wonder and love and told her she was the most beautiful woman the world had ever seen, but as he walked with her along the isle, nodding briefly at a few important guests, inside he felt nothing.
Elysion had finally collapsed under the struggle of trying to save an Earth that was apparently not sick. Mamoru had explained what Ceithin already knew, that the Golden Crystal was for healing, but the planet was simply evolving from one state to another, so there was nothing for it to mend. They had exhausted all options. There was nothing more for them to do, Mamoru had spent more time in Elysion as a researcher than he’d ever spent there as a King, searching and experimenting and praying for hope. It was all up to Usagi now and the raw, destructive power of the crystal.
Mamoru had only hesitated for a second before hitting Ceithin with a second blow, but each word had to be pulled from his lips with reluctance and regret.
Ceithin's children would stay mortal, there was nothing that could be done; when the Freeze came, unlike the Senshi, his children and their descendants would most likely perish. Ami had been trying to recreate the Senshi’s and Shitennou’s powers with the help of both Crystals for decades in the hope of extending their protection to the rest of the world's population, a vaccine of sorts to impending doom. She had not found a solution, but she had found an answer. The Senshi and Shitennou had inherited their abilities from the Silver Millennium, gifts which had been given in a lost time, gifts which only remained with them because of the sacrifice made by Princess Serenity’s mother. To even hope to replicate such power would require Usagi to share her mother’s fate, something beyond imagining for any of them.
They had truly lost, it seemed.
And he would have to tell Mina.
He kissed his daughter farewell at the alter, her happy tears leaving him unmoved, and handed her over to death.
~*~
The end of the world came much sooner than they had planned. Owain’s son had only become a year old the week before, Airi had just been promoted at work.
Perhaps it was a blessing that they were all together in the end. The Senshi stood with the Shitennou, dressed in uniform for the first time in decades, while people ran around screaming in fear and panic and despair. On sight of the warriors many stopped and began to pray to them, begging Usagi for salvation and safety. They wanted their homes and families back, they pleaded for life and Heaven to the fourteen men and women gifted with powers beyond imagination, but all Usagi could do was cry with them while her guardians tried as best they could to hold back the tides of destruction.
The ground below them cracked open down deep to the mantle, swallowing people and structures and the flooding salt waters of the furious oceans. Fires burned and melted and ate away civilisation; cliffs and sinkholes formed in seconds while mountains crumbled in the blink of an eye.
It had been Uranus who first tried to make Usagi see reason. Only the guardian of the Silver Crystal could awaken the true power of Sailor Saturn and end the world. It was up to the Moon Princess to save them.
But Usagi looked over to Mina, who was too busy clutching her grandson and crying with her daughter over the body of Peter to think of the destruction around them, and Usagi could not do it. She could not be the one to kill Mina’s children, she could not bring herself to sentence them to death with her own lips.
Ami and Jared tried, even Mamoru took her by the shoulders and shook the little blonde woman, as small as a child, and begged her to do it, to save those they could before they all perished.
But still Usagi looked over to Mina and couldn't, she stared into Owain's terrified face as he searched between his mother and father for the answer. She fell to her knees, hail stones of fire and ice raining down around them, and she begged through tears not to be forced to do it, to not be a murderer of innocents. They had been trying for years to think of something, there had to be another option.
Finally it was Ceithin who tilted up the Princess’ chin. It was Ceithin, ignoring his son's eyes and his grandson's wailing, who gave her the permission she so desperately needed, and the forgiveness she craved. He clutched at her shoulders, looking her in her light eyes and told her the truth. Do it now, he had said, or you'll be responsible for the end of all humanity. Save Earth.
Sailor Saturn brought forth her true and terrible power, and then Usagi enveloped the world in pristine crystal.
~*~
When Mina woke, it was to silence. She felt a weight on her chest and looked down to find her sleeping grandson curled on her, his hair just as chocolately as she remembered it, his little outfit the very same: a dark blue sweater with animal prints, a red collared shirt underneath. She breathed a deep sigh of relief, her lungs heaving out a stale and painful breath of air.
The baby disintegrated into a fine, shining dust.
~*~
As Mina stumbled away from the car wreck, her lip, cheek and forearms bloodied from the impact, she felt numb, for the first time since she’d awoken in Crystal Tokyo there was no pain, no sorrow, only nothingness. It was better than alcohol, it was better than drugs, it was better even than sex. All she had to do was hold onto the numbness and it would be alright.
The rain began to fall, a low rumble overhead signalling the impending storm. Already the flashing colour of the emergency services could be seen making their way over to her, but she didn’t care, she didn’t feel, she was going to be fine. Then she looked down to her hand, to the gentle weight of the golden locket, the sweet images of her family - her baby girl with Ceithin and her holding Owain - and then the numbness fell away to the bitter sharpness of pain.
She wept, wondering what it was all for.
Prompt: Day 4
Triggers: Car crash, end of the world stuff etc.
AN: A continuation of sorts of my ficathon piece “An Evening”. It concentrates on Mina crashing the Rolls Royce. Don’t worry if you haven’t read it, you don’t need to, but if you have, there are a few inconsistencies because I was trying to disguise my identity in the ficathon and I didn’t want to give too much away. Basically these are the Hooligans characters after Hooligans.
Her ears weren’t ringing, there was no feeling of them being stuffed with cotton, her hearing was in no way damaged. Mina wasn’t sure whether it was because their laws now dictated that music be played below a certain decibel or whether it was her body’s superhuman ability to repair itself. The second option left a bitter taste in the back of her throat, bile spreading upwards. All their power within and still she had failed. Her breath hitched hard in her throat and her hand reached up to cover her neck, as if to push the threatening sob back down into her heart. Her fingers closed around her windpipe and clawed their way to the suprasternal notch, trailing pink scores down her neck until it reached the hollow. Her stomach suddenly lined itself with leaden ice. Without a second’s thought she twisted herself, wrapping her body around the front seat and ignoring the auto-pilot warning to remain seated and secure at all times in the moving vehicle. She searched briefly in the gloom of the backseat for her purse. When she found it, shimmering and dark on the floor, she sat herself back into the driver’s seat and began frantically dumping its contents onto the chair next to her, her eyes, wide with worry, skimming desperately over its contents and her whole body shaking. Fuck, the word screamed through her mind and repeated itself over and over, like a prayer for help, until her frenzied hands finally touched a cold, thin chain of gold. She calmed instantly and lifted it, the heavy weight of a large golden heart locket dangling like a pendulum at the bottom. She didn’t open it, choosing instead to clutch it to her heart, closing her eyes and biting her lip, silencing all the sound of her sorrow as she cried out heavy tears.
The crystal paradise outside her window sped past in blurs of light and reflection, shimmering with the colours of the rainbow, but all she saw was the dark abyss behind her eyelids and the hateful and cherished memories it brought with it. When she could take no more of it, when their faces began to focus too clearly in her mind, their features contorting too vividly with fear and despair, her eyes snapped open and they faded to the background.
It was the alcohol in her system which made her weak, no doubt. Minako had never been one to cry; unlike the Queen - when she had been known as just Usagi and even now in the privacy of her chambers or in the company of her friends - who wept at the drop of a hat, Minako had never been able to shed tears easily. It was her one bane as an actress.
She looked down and noticed that her shag for the night had torn her dress. The gold sequence glittered up at her with a gash from the hem up to her mid-thigh, threads of white cloth from the underlayer showing through, parting to reveal the smooth skin underneath. She cursed as she wiped her eyes with the back of her hand, giving up on caring about the state of her appearance; her makeup had been smudged long before she had left the third night club and tumbled drunkenly into her husband’s pride and joy, stolen for a night of oblivion and defiance.
He would do nothing, of course, when he found out. He would fume internally and she would rub salt into his wound, deeper and deeper, until he couldn’t take it anymore. Then and only then would some poor soul face his wrath. It would be simpler to yell and rant, but Ceithin was not a simple man. Some were fired for minor mistakes, and they were lucky. Most would be humiliated somehow, usually in public, or roared at into fearful submission. Ceithin held the power to make or destroy a person’s livelihood with a sentence from his lips, his influence second only to the Royal Couple’s. Hers, one the other hand... she scoffed at the thought.
Others would suffer for Mina’s actions, but not her, Ceithin never gave her the decency of actually blaming her for her own irresponsibility, for her own weaknesses. He never confronted her, he knew he could not. He knew what would happen if he did. He feared that fight as much as she sought for it, but even so, she was the bigger coward. No, she thought, I am the only coward.
This life had ruined her, fate’s blows too cruel. She could not see ahead of her, her world filtered through an unfocused haze of salted water and memories as the dam which reigned in her tears broke again, letting loose a torrent.
In one moment Ceithin had burdened himself with her duty, he had stolen the role that should have been hers, rescued her from her terrible destiny. Ceithin had done what she could not. He had destroyed the world and he had saved it, and in doing so he became a monster and a saviour all at once.The worst of it was she admired him for what he had done. She loved him more than she thought possible for his devotion, for his strength, for his ability to bear his burden. She could never be like him, she had proven it time and again.
She gave him nothing but her contempt and her hate, her righteous fury ever brimming on the surface, yet he never allowed her an excuse to release it and each time he denied her, she found herself more grateful than the last. To face him would be to face her own inaction and it would break him with the atrocity he committed. Yet still she wanted it. She wanted to be allowed to scream at him, to tell him how much she hated him for what he had done, and maybe... maybe start to feel better. For now she was trapped, caught between her pain and guilt and anger. The cycle crumbled everything she touched, it was turning Ceithin cold and cruel, burdened already as he was with his crimes. Slowly it was happening but she could see it nonetheless, the more she toyed with him, taunted him with the threat of openly blaming him for what he had done, the deeper he was receding into himself. He was becoming Kunzite again.
“Sensing high levels of stress and/or anxiety, do you require medical assistance?”
The voice which pierced through her thoughts belonged to one of Zach’s ‘primary research assistants’ and was now the standard for every auto-pilot system in the country. A long-legged, skinny brunette with an all too fake, eager-to-please smile. She was already despised by the Senshi for having flaunted her relationship with her superior so publicly, but at that moment if she were in the car with Mina, the Senshi would have ripped out the woman’s voice box.
“Just take me home!” she snapped.
“Continuing on to current destination. Crystal Palace, twenty seven point four five kilometres remaining. Please remain seated at all times while the vehicle is in motion.”
Mina was about to smash her fist into the screen on the dashboard, but thought better of it. She had no clue how the vehicle worked, for all she knew, breaking the computer could halt the car. An involuntarily image of a disapproving glare from her husband floated through her agitated mind and her mood suddenly deflated from anger back to its original sense of misery. Ceithin blamed her for his own guilt and hated her, that she knew, but he could not help that he loved her more than it was meant to be possible for a man to feel. It was for that reason, not the disaster of their dying world, which caused him to grip Usagi’s shoulders at that crucial moment. Borne out of the love he held for Minako, he spared her the agony of forcing the annihilation of billions, the deaths of a precious few, in order to save what was now left of humanity.
It was Ceithin who took a hold on Usagi, amid the screams of the dying and the great roars and cracks of the Earth falling apart, of people and animals and machines being swallowed into the giant fizzures of concrete and metal. Towering structures quivering and tumbling down around them, crushing the fearful, hapless ants underneath. It was Ceithin who made her Princess command the use of the mighty Sailor Saturn.
It was Ceithin who took everything from her.
In so many ways, death would have been the better option, but he was much too strong for that, and apparently he had thought that she was too. He was wrong, and she would prove it. “Rolls two zerro zerro three, disable auto-pilot, engage manual.” She sniffed heavily and rubbed the impending tears away, composing herself enough to sit up straight and grip the steering wheel, the golden locket wrapped tightly in her hand. That was something she would never let go of. The determination of the Soldier of Venus had taken over and her eyes froze to the colour of Arctic blue.
Zach’s lackey reared her ugly head again. “Warning, auto-pilot is designed for a safer driving experience, manual drive should only be used in cases of extreme emergency. Are you sure you want to disab-”
“Engage the fucking manual drive!” Mina’s fury doubled.
“Auto-pilot disabled. Manual drive enabled. Please drive cautiously and obey road safety regulations.”
As if to deliberately spite the temerity of the vehicle’s computer system, Mina’s golden-stemmed foot pushed the pedal flush into the floor.
The Rolls Phantom was a smooth ride, even with over five hundred years on it. It was Ceithin’s, so it came as no surprise. He’d never actually worked on it himself, but no expense had been spared to restore it - parts were terribly hard to come by, especially for a petrol engine. The leather was real too, although how he managed that was a mystery - one of another million other things about him that Minako had yet to solve.
She indicated left and the invis opened a hole which followed her car, running parallel with it. She eyed the opening, a gap in what was otherwise just a mutli-coloured sheen which gleamed like the skin of a soap bubble in between lanes. It was an invention from Zach’s own mind, created to complement the auto-piloting system, although the design itself had come from Zach’s many followers, the hateful voice most likely being one of them. They’d done something with the crystal, creating force fields which separated lanes, ensuring that cars could not swerve into others if there was a malfunction with the auto-drive. The gap kept following her as the Rolls Royce sped onwards through the empty night’s road, Crys T was not known for its traffic jams and even if it had been, Ceithin’s was a Palace Vehicle, the auto-pilot system on all other cars were programmed to move them out of its way.
It became a horrible game to Mina, she shifted gears into fourth, and then to fifth, trying ridiculously to beat the system, to outpace the gap. How fast she went she had no idea, her concentration was on the road ahead, on the hole in the shimmering wall to her left. A Rolls Royce was not a car designed for speed, even the Phantom, but she pushed it anyway, the hum of the engine turning to a soft growl as it raced along the smooth black strip ahead of her. She opened the windows and the wind roared through her hair, whipping it up into a hysterical, tangled mass of liquid gold.
The auto-pilot said something, what it was Mina had no idea, the whore’s patronising blissfully drowned out by the cacophony of the engine noise and the crashing, freezing gale of the night. The necklace in her hand was warm but the chain, wrapped so tightly around her hand, bit into her fingers, making them throb and swell from lack of blood flow. She didn’t care. All she saw was the gap alongside her. Her destiny riding with her, inescapable, a hole in her heart. She couldn’t beat it, she hadn’t beaten it.
She was furious. At Ceithin, at the world, at herself. Her eyes spilt painful tears as the wind blasted her face, its iciness biting at her ears and cheeks and nose. Her head began to pound and the noise was deafening. The world swept past her, building after building after crystaline building. Their beautiful future mocking her cruelly.
She had indicated left, she gritted her teeth and swerved right instead, careening into the closed invisible barrier at full speed.
The car crumpled on impact and rolled, twice, three, four times before breaking through the invis and skidding along the pavement until its path was brought abruptly to a halt by a light pole, the Rolls upside down and steaming, its broken body having trailed in pieces behind it.
~*~
“Hold on, Mina,” Ami was staring intently at the fuzzy black and white image on the screen, one hand on the keypad of the monitor, the other holding the ultrasound transducer upright on Mina’s swollen belly. With a soft click she froze the image and peered closer.
“What is it?” Mina asked, a mixture of impatience and anticipation. She looked at Ceithin, as if to make sure he was still alright with her asking that question, and then darted back to the screen when he’d answered her with a small smile. She tightened her grip on his hand.
When Ami finally pulled away from the monitor she turned to face the couple with the brightest smile either of them had ever seen her give.
“It’s a girl, isn’t it?” Mina beamed. “I knew it,” she said as she looked at Ceithin again, her expression a combination of smugness and elation, “I knew it. Pay up.”
Ceithin almost seemed worried. “A... girl...” His grey eyes were clouded over in thought as his eyebrows furrowed. Boys were easy to handle. Play some sports, have a few meaningful discussions about the world and women and they could pretty much get on with the rest themselves. But a girl... images flashed through his brain of beating back hordes of horny men with baseball bats and golf clubs, of doing feminine hygiene product runs, attempting to navigate through minefield after minefield of complex emotions, endless discussions about fashion models, training bras and shopping for shoes. It downright terrified him. “A girl...” What was he going to do with a girl?
And then he looked down into Mina’s slightly plumper, glowing face. She was beautiful, even with swollen ankles, weird cravings and the look of superiority for being right radiating from her wonderful face. She was a miracle, she was the strongest person he’s ever known, and he knew that no matter what, as long as she was with him, he could have a hundred girls and he would be fine. They would do it together... and of course, he had back up. The reassurance relaxed him significantly - this was not a Shitennou duty, he did not mind making mistakes, especially since he knew that there would always be someone there who could fix a problem he could not - the child would have nine aunts (one of them biological - his sister), four of which already had experience raising a child; two grandmothers; two grandfathers; and at least four uncles. “This is one bet that I don’t mind losing.” He reached into his pocket with his free hand and pulled out a note, handing it to her while he kissed her soft palm. Finally, after so very long Mina and Ceithin - Venus and Kunzite - could really have something of themselves, for themselves, without feeling it was somehow taking away from their duties to their lieges. They were going to have a baby girl.
“I wouldn’t say that just yet.” Ami’s smile had not moved from her pretty features.
Both Mina’s and Ceithin’s faces shot up and stared at Ami with confusion.
“It’s a boy?” Ceithin asked, hope, unavoidable hope, sneaking into his voice.
Ami’s smile never wavered. “It’s both,” she said.
For one terrible moment Mina was filled with horror. “It’s a hermaphrodite?!”
Ami placed her forehead into her hand with exasperation. “It’s twins, Mina. Twins” she said, unable to understand how someone who’d once led entire armies into battle could truly be such a loveable ditz.
All colour drained from Ceithin’s face.
Mina was laughing so hard she began to cry.
~*~
Makoto was weeping openly, clutching onto Noel as if her very life depended on it. He in turn held her tightly, shushing her with soft sounds and stroking her hair, hoping it would help her pain, but to no avail. “Mortal...” she whispered, “they’re mortal.”
Usagi had glassy eyes and was looking down, as if she were somehow ashamed.
Mamoru rose from his seat, letting go of his wife’s hand to make his way over to his lead guardian. He stared into Ceithin’s eyes, “I’m so sorry,” he said firmly, genuinely. “I wish there was something I could do.”
“There’s still a chance-” Usagi started, her unwavering optimism rearing its ugly head, “Just because they won’t have superpowers doesn’t mean that they’ll...” she trailed off, unable to bring herself to say the words. “Maybe the Crystal will grant them a longer life! I mean, we’re not exactly going to live forever either, right? We’re not really immortal. We don’t know how long they’re going to live for, they’re just babies! Maybe they’ll live for hundreds and hundreds of years!” Her gaze was flittering between Ami, Zach, Rei and Noel, hoping that one of them, any of them, scientist or seer, would pipe up and back her theory. She avoided looking at either Mina or Ceithin at all costs, each of them clutching a swaddle of cloth, sleeping bundles - one of blue and one of pink. Ceithin’s face was too hard and impassive for Usagi to feel comfortable with. When his features set themselves in that certain way she was almost afraid of him, as if he were some horrible statue of stone. But as frightened of Ceithin as she was, her fear for Mina’s well-being was tenfold. The blonde, so usually full of expression - whether happiness, giddiness or resolute determination - was as closed off as her husband. Usagi had no clue as to what Minako was thinking and she hated it as much as she hated thunderstorms.
“Usagi, even if they did, they will not have the same strength and protection that we do, there’s-” Zach hesitated to say it in front of the new parents. Ceithin’s eyes flicked onto his green ones, forcing him to continue what he’d started, pulling the full truth reluctantly out of him. “There’s no certainty that they will survive the Freeze when it arrives. They’re just as likely to die as everyone else on the planet.”
“A five percent chance,” Ceithin’s voice was grave, uncracked and solid, the complete opposite of the raging fear within him. He looked up at Ami, “That’s what you said, isn’t it? One in twenty will survive the Freeze.”
Makoto’s muffled sobs increased in volume and Noel closed his arms around her tighter.
Jared sighed heavily, “Look, this disaster isn’t going to happen for a while, half a century at least, we’ve established that. Just because these children are going to havenormal lives doesn’t mean they can’t be happy ones. It doesn’t mean that Airi and Owain won’t grow up being loved and adored by their mom and dad, and spoilt rotten by their aunts and uncles. We knew we were going to lose loved ones, the Freeze isn’t something which is going to catch us by surprise. We all have family we’re going to lose, Noel has a brother, my niece and neph-” he stopped suddenly at Rei’s gentle touch to his arm and noticed her lilac eyes flit over to Usagi, who was looking as if she were to blame for everything.
“I’m sorry for all of those other people, Jared, but the Freeze cannot get these children,” Mina’s voice was as cold as her icy blue eyes. At that moment it was plain to see that she did not care about Jared’s family, or Noel’s or anyone else’s. She was a mother now, she had become more selfish. There was Usagi and there were her children to keep safe, everyone else would be regrettable collateral damage. “It will not,” she stated with finality.
Mina didn’t see it, but Ceithin looked over to her, and his eyes hardened like pieces of granite in the face of her statement of certainty. There was something changing in him, Usagi felt it as plain as day. She didn’t know what it was, she didn’t know what would happen, but it made her incredibly sad.
They were meant to have a palace full of children and grandchildren and great grandchildren. Chibi-Usa was supposed to have an innumerable amount of brothers, sisters, cousins, nieces, nephews... in Usagi’s mind the Crystal Palace wasn’t going to be a palace at all. She’d planned that it would be like a big community centre, full of vibrancy and families, Mina’s and Ceithin’s brood being completely indistinguishable from Rei’s and Jared’s or Mako’s and Noel’s or Ami’s and Zach’s. She’d laughed about it to herself in her dreams: they wouldn’t be a futuristic monarchy, they were going to be a big bunch of magical hippies. That’s what she had wanted. Happy friends and laughing voices echoing through the crystalline walls.
How very silly of her. How ridiculously childish. That was not how the world worked.
She began to cry too.
~*~
His eyes shot open on instinct, his senses having picked up the other conscious person in the room. He could feel her, standing close by and not sleeping warmly next to him. He sighed, rubbed at his eyes briefly and then glanced at the alarm on the bedside table. It was too early in the morning to be awake, barely past midnight. The twins wouldn’t wake for a good four hours to feed - that was one mercy they provided their parents, they ate like clockwork. Mina had joked they’d probably gotten their impeccable timekeeping from him.
He rose from the bed and padded softly to her lithe form, deceptively small as she leaned over the wooden crib at the foot of the bed. Wrapping his arms around her, he settled the back of her blonde head in the crook of his neck. “Can’t sleep?” he asked quietly, looking over his wife to the objects of her scrutiny: the two tiny sleeping babies, nestled together below in a prison of crib bumpers, rail covers and Sesame Street themed mobiles.
He could feel the tension coursing through Mina’s body, her muscles taut and awkward, and for a moment she didn’t quite fit into his arms. “Relax,” he whispered into her hair, “they’re still breathing, they’re still here. Nothing is going to happen to them. Not on my watch.”
There was a sharp intake of breath and then her whole body fell into place. She felt heavy, as if it was more a sense of resignation than relief. “I saw an article today in a magazine,” she mumbled, her voice tired, “about Hair Tourniquet Syndrome.” She could feel his chin roll lightly on her crown, an indication that he had tilted his head to look at her. Mirroring his action she lifted her eyes to meet his, the moonlight illuminating them in the gloom. “Adult hair is surprisingly strong, it can wrap around their fingers and toes, cutting the skin and causing severe swelling and blisters. It’s agonising, it can even lead to amputation.” She could tell he had lifted his eyebrows and she sighed, turning back to stare at Airi and Owain.
“You’re checking to see if they have hair in between their toes?” There was a hint of worry in his voice, “They’re not in pain, Mina. They’re resting, like you should be.”
She shook her head and he could feel the shift on his collar bone. “That’s not why I’m awake, I couldn’t give a damn about Hair Tourniquet Syndrome.”
Her voice didn’t shake, there were no tears, but Ceithin could feel the nerves, the agitation.
“I’m not afraid of accidentally dropping them, I’m not worried about colic, or cot death, or meningitis or choking. I don’t spend all night awake debating the pros and cons of whether they should get the MMR vaccination. All I keep thinking about is-” she couldn’t continue her voice cracking. Still, the tears would not come.
“It’ll be alright,” he said, his tone definite as his fingers slid over her bare arms with reassurance.
She didn’t notice any of it. “Ceithin, I should be terrified about those things. I should be standing here checking their toes for hair.” She sounded like she was in disbelief, “Instead, all I can do is think about when they’re older and the world kills them as if they’re nothing but forgettable extras in some cheesy disaster film.” She stretched out her arm, her hand open wide as if to touch them, but she pulled away, thinking better of it, fearing she would wake them. “What's the point in worrying about those things? When no matter what we do to protect them they’re going to die anyway?” Ceithin swallowed heavily, a sign that what she'd said had struck a nerve, although she wouldn’t have been able to tell if she hadn’t felt it through his skin, her back pressed to his chest. He was so good at hiding himself away, of taking all his fears and tucking them deep into a spot where they could never be seen by others, just so he could keep moving forward. She wished she had that talent. “I just... I feel so helpless. I’m letting them down.” She did touch them then, unable to resist, her fingers gently caressing the soft pale down of her son’s hair before shifting to trace their way along her daughter’s tiny bud of a nose. She couldn’t help the smile from spreading across her face and it was all she could do to stop herself from picking them up and holding them close.
“You’re a great mother, Mina.” She didn’t need to hear about how all people died eventually, that it was a childish fancy to wish for immortality, that everyone else had babies and raised them knowing they would one day perish, and sometimes not in the best of ways. For Mina this was as close as she could come to panic, she needed to be soothed, that was all. She may not have thought she had anything in common with regular new mothers, but in essence, she was exactly the same, she worried just like them, it was just unfortunate that her fears were founded and brutal. His plan of action came quickly, in the morning he would call Ami and ask her to have a talk with Mina about new mothers and anxiety, Mamoru had told him about that, it wasn’t much, but it was something. For now though, all she needed was for him to be there for her, to support her, like she did for Usagi and the others, and him. “These kids are luckiest things alive to have you.” He'd chosen his words deliberately. A subtle reminder that for now they lived and were happy, blissfully ignorant of the dangers their world posed.
Mina sighed and turned to face her husband. “What mother spends all her time wishing her children had never been born?”
Ceithin looked away from her to the crib, that familiar look of determination creeping onto his face, a small frown and a hardening of his eyes. The ones who are afraid. The Freeze would not get their children. He would not let Mina down.
~*~
He was deep into a report analysis when an annoyed huff pull away his attention. He looked up through the dull, yellow light of his desk lamp to find his wife dressed elegantly in a simple forest green dress, her lips a siren red, the colours evidently chosen to suit the time of year. She was leaning against the door frame, her arms crossed in an obvious show of displeasure.
“I can’t come. Tell them I’ll make it up to them,” he said simply and went back to his reading.
“Not good enough,” she stated firmly.
He looked up again and lifted his eyebrows as if he were somehow disappointed with her answer. “There’s a lot of work I need to do tonight, if I could make it, I would.”
She uncrossed her arms and strode into the office, snatching the piece of paper from his hands to read it. He sat back in his chair, as if he were letting a child misbehave in order to berate them for it once they were done. It infuriated her. Her ire was only aggravated by the contents of the report. She threw the sheet back at him, her sky coloured eyes blazing like a storm. “You’re missing your childrens’ first Christmas play to read about a few crazy monks prophesying about the end of the world?”
“Rei sent it herself. Their predictions appear to be quite accurate.”
“Rei is coming to the play!”
“Good for her,” Ceithin sighed, frustrated that Mina didn’t seem to understand. It was not as if he wanted to miss Airi and Owain singing their hearts out to ‘When Santa Got Stuck Up the Chimney’, but if missing a few cute moments meant finding a way to stop the Freeze without having to seal everything in raw, uncontainable power then it was a sacrifice he had to make. This was not something they could play around with, the Earth was changing, already it could be seen. If Makoto’s investigations truly indicated what they appeared to be then time was running out. Yet using the Crystal would have severe consequences, not just for the population but for the existence of the Earth itself. Whether through its own natural process or through Usagi’s magic, the planet would become inhospitable. They had realised that in order for the Crystal to save the world, they would have to kill it first and then rebuild it, as the other planets had been during the beginning of the Silver Millennium. It was the oldest of magic and by the end of it Usagi’s power would reign supreme, with the fate of the Earth depending on the gift in her possession, taking guardianship away from Mamoru. That thought didn’t scare him nearly so much as it once would have, it was no longer about the Moon and the Earth, it was about saving what they could. So many people were going to die, his children were going to suffer. He needed to find a way to safeguard their future. “I have to read this report.”
“Ceithin, it’s not like we don’t know it’s coming, what’s so new about what these monks are saying?”
“They think it’ll happen in the next century, we could have more time.”
Mina’s lips pressed themselves into a firm line. “More time for what? Owain and Airi aren’t going to get a longer childhood just because the world might try and explode a little later than scheduled. You can spare an hour.”
“I can’t.”
“Cut the bullshit!” she yelled. “You know damn well why you refuse to come and it’s cowardly!”
He stood up at that, slowly, deliberately, his knuckles pressing on the table and supporting him as he leaned forward. “What the hell is that supposed to mean?”
Mina boldly went on. “You don’t want to go! You don’t want to make these kinds of memories because you don’t want the pain of remembering when they’re gone.”
Ceithin stood back from the desk and frowned, like he was listening to nonsense. “Don’t be ridiculous.” He sat himself back down and began reading the report.
“You’re going to miss these things later on, whether it’s by the Freeze or from age-” she swallowed down the heavy lump which built in her throat at the thought, forcing the tears back from her stinging eyes “-your memories will be all you’ll have left of them.”
He looked up at that, furious that she was upsetting herself and even more angry at her implication. “Mina, I am not trying to avoid my children. Everything I do, I do for them. None of us has taken a break since they were born. Usagi spends fourteen hours a day locked in the lab with Ami and Zach trying to figure out how to control that fucking Crystal! Noel and Jared spend every waking minute struggling to fund this operation, Mako’s all but been banished to places where rats and cockroaches have problems surviving and Mamoru has not been seen corporally since he travelled into Elysion two years ago! I barely sleep, this work is my life. What more can I do?”
“You can stop trying to save them from the inevitable.” She shook her head in disappoint. “They’re mortal, appreciate what time they have left.”
“In case you need reminding, Mina, over six billion people are going to die as well.”
“Owain and Airi will be the only ones you’ll regret losing.” With that she stalked out of his den.
He sat back defeated, wondering when and how his and Mina’s views had swapped so dramatically. She had apparently accepted that they were going to lose their children; Ceithin wasn’t sure it was something to be happy about. It changed nothing. He’d made a promise to himself that he would protect them, that he would keep his family safe from the Freeze. Mina may have given up, but he most certainly would not.
But that didn’t mean that she didn’t have a valid point.
Ceithin sighed, rubbing his face with his hands and then tossing the paper back onto the central mound of documents cluttering his desk. He stood and grabbed his jacket from the back of his chair. “Mina,” he called out as he made his way out, switching off the small lamp as he went. “Wait, I’m coming with you.”
~*~
Mina’s eyebrows lifted and a playful smile graced her face as she eyed her husband’s usually steady hands. He was dressed impeccably, as always, the silver tie highlighting the colour of his stern eyes. Ceithin seemed incapable of adjusting the knot correctly. He was frowning at himself in the mirror, as if his disapproval could somehow convince the tie to fix itself.
“Let me,” Mina offered as she made her way towards him, the dupioni silk of her champagne dress rustling ever so softly as she moved.
“It’s alright,” he practically growled out, his frustration aimed at the long piece of cloth draped around his neck.
She gave him a warm smile at that, ignoring his denial she shrugged off her gold lace bolero jacket so as not to wrinkle it while she worked. As she gently pried his hands away and began to undo his tie, she noticed that his frown softened as he stared beyond her to their reflection. "Are you checking me out?" she asked, knowing the answer.
He looked down to meet her eyes, his gaze practically having to tearing itself away from the the view in the mirror. "It's a beautiful dress."
She flipped the tie over, the soft material fanning its way across their vision for a spilt moment. "I know," she said, leaning in closer, "that's why I chose it."
"Everyone will be watching you."
"Everyone will be watching the Airi," she corrected. "Besides, I'm an old woman, it would be kind of gross for people to be staring at the mother of the bride when we have a wedding full of hot, young blood."
"You're not old," he stated, unwilling to let her divulge in the fantasy, "you don't look a day over twenty eight," and you never will... he didn't have the heart to say the last part, not right then, on what was meant to be one of their happiest days, a celebration of their daughter's new life.
It was not as if she didn't know anyway. She stood back, disguising the move as if she were admiring her handiwork, and did her best to keep her voice level. "As long as I still have you staring, then it's all I'll ever need."
She moved towards him again when he seemed to struggle with adjusting the white rose into the button hole of his lapel. Smiling as she plucked the flower from his hands she asked, “Were you like this for our wedding?”
His answer was simple and immediate, although not without affection. “No.”
She could feel his breath on her forehead, the soft air caressing the bridge of her nose. “Were you worse?” she teased.
He lifted his arms and cupped her hands into his larger ones, sliding the pad of his thumb over the light sheen of her nails as he pulled her fingers away from his jacket. “You’re the other half of me, Mina, without you I’d never be whole.” His eyes held her firmly in place, his rare speech of open affection stilling her like a spell. The emotion of the day was getting to him, he knew it, but at that moment his pride in her and his gratitude kept him talking. “I had made the mistake of not choosing you before. I was alone with only my responsibility to Endymion and it made me a bitter, cold man. I wasn’t going to make that mistake in this life." He pulled out a chain from his pocket then, a golden heart shaped locket dangling from the end. "You don't have to put it on now, I know this ensemble you're wearing took weeks to plan, but I thought it would be something you'd like to have." He placed the gift into her hands and basked in the glow of her grateful smile when she opened it.
"You know me better than anyone else," she said.
"When I find myself losing my way you always bring me back, you keep me strong. The day I married you there was nothing for me to be afraid of.”
“I felt the very same thing,” she whispered. “If it wasn't going to ruin my make up I'd kiss you.”
Ceithin's eyes scanned her, sliding over her face, along the curve of her neck and downwards, a small smile slipping onto his lips. “The reception ends at six to tonight and I'm not meeting Mamoru until eleven thirty tomorrow,” his voice was low, his suggestion heavy.
“Dad, please!” Owain had popped his blond head through the door and was looking at his parents with a face of mild disgust. “That's my mother you're trying to-” he stopped himself from continuing at the look he received from his father. “You're right, I don't even want to finish that sentence. You're both in your fifties, you’re too old to make more babies.”
Ceithin glared at his son as Mina continued to fiddle with the final details of his suit. “Apparently you’re at the right age.”
Owain's blue eyes narrowed into a carbon copy of his father's glare. “Dad...” he started, his voice edged with warning.
“You barely know this girl.” It was a point he’d made several times before in the past few months, and Ceithin had no qualms about raising it again. “She could be lying to you, there’s no proof this child is yours.”
“She doesn’t care about our money, she loves me and I'm not shirking from my responsibilities.”
“Twenty three is too young to be a father.” Ceithin wanted to tell him so badly. Live, go out and have fun, forget about responsibility and duty and just enjoy your life. Don’t have children, my son, because it’s not going to last. He sighed, knowing that he had to calm himself, it would not do to be a wallowing mess, too many people would take advantage of it, and it was certainly not something he wanted his son, or worse, the groom to see. Ceithin had an image to uphold, especially to the man who had the audacity to marry his daughter.
“Airi is getting married today, in case you’d forgotten she’s the same age as me. Why am I too young and she isn't? That's sexist.”
“Airi is different. She’s been with Peter since they were sixteen,” Mina interrupted to prevent an argument from starting. “Enough now from the both of you. I need to make sure your aunts aren’t driving your sister insane, Usagi had been saying something about hairpins and YouTube." Both men smiled at the predictable torture Airi was most likely receiving at that very moment. "You can walk me to her room, your father needs some time alone,” Mina announced.
With a grateful smile Ceithin gave her a peck on her cheek, watching as she gracefully put on her bolero and then took their son’s arm. It could not be more obvious that Owain was Mina’s son, he had a fierce and extrovert passion for life, and a sense of duty as strong as his mother’s. While Airi was also the splitting image of her mother, she took on more of Ceithin’s temperament - calm, loyal and closed.
“I haven’t seen that look in a long time.” This time it was Mamoru who had interrupted his internal musing, the dark haired man’s piercing gaze reflecting a hint of amusement. “Nervous?”
Ceithin’s wasn’t afraid to admit that he was. “Very. I don’t trust him.”
Mamoru’s smile grew. “Then trust Airi. She’s a good judge of character, Peter's a good man.”
"I don't seem to have much of a choice in the matter, you should remember that for when Chibi-Usa comes along. Fathers get no say." Ceithin was fidgeting with his cuff links and did not notice the sudden dip in Mamoru's mood, the guilt-ridden drop of his eyes.
“I want this to be perfect for her," he continued, being unusually open about his fears, "she deserves to be happy.”
“It will be perfect.” Mamoru tried to think of something inspirational to say, like Ceithin could do so effortlessly for him. “You’ll be her rock when you walk her down the isle,” he managed to get out, and then moved on when he realised how silly it sounded. “For now though,” he said, tilting his head at the door, “you’re needed outside, Zach’s drunk a little too much and is being less than discreet with one of Peter’s attractive relatives in the rose garden.”
Ceithin’s eyes suddenly grew cold and Mamoru knew he’d made a mistake in telling him. He had hoped it would provoke some form of mild exasperation and provide a good opportunity to distract his friend, but it seemed that he’d miscalculated. With so much hanging over Mamoru's head, and with Ceithin acting so much more different than usual, it was hard to judge what the right thing to do and say was.
“It’s my daughter’s wedding,” he stated.
Mamoru could see he was angry. “Zach has always had trouble keeping it in his pants,” he said, trying to lighten the mood. “If we go divert his attention now no one will notice. I have Jared on distraction duty at the moment, but Ami's not going to be outsmarted by him for very long, she'll see through it and start looking for Zach soon.” He made to leave but Ceithin refused to move.
“Mamoru, what is going on?” His voice was bold when he asked, as if he was commanding an answer.
Mamoru swallowed, there were few people in the world who could make him feel like a fearful child. “What do you mean?”
“Zach doesn’t do things like this unless he’s upset. You said you wanted to see me tomorrow.” The pieces were falling together. “What is going on?” he repeated.
“Nothing-”
“What do you know?” Ceithin took in a deep breath, unwilling to let it go. He could not wait. Not for this. Not when he knew what was coming. "Please."
Mamoru let out a resigned sigh, his body suddenly becoming very tired. He gave up the pretence and indicated for his friend to take a seat. That day or the next, it didn't matter really when Ceithin would be told, the memory of his daughter's wedding would be tainted either way with an inesacapable bitterness. He'd just hoped to prolong his friend's happiness for just a little while longer but it appeared that such graces were not to be given. He struggled at first to say anything, but Ceithin, ever patient, waited unmoving until Mamoru could find the right words. “We’ve lost,” he said eventually. “It’s over.”
~*~
Ceithin was numb as he took Airi’s steady hand. He gave her his best smile and he stood as solidly as he had always done. He was the father she needed him to be, the man she loved with all her innocent and youthful heart. He had stared at her with eyes apparently full of wonder and love and told her she was the most beautiful woman the world had ever seen, but as he walked with her along the isle, nodding briefly at a few important guests, inside he felt nothing.
Elysion had finally collapsed under the struggle of trying to save an Earth that was apparently not sick. Mamoru had explained what Ceithin already knew, that the Golden Crystal was for healing, but the planet was simply evolving from one state to another, so there was nothing for it to mend. They had exhausted all options. There was nothing more for them to do, Mamoru had spent more time in Elysion as a researcher than he’d ever spent there as a King, searching and experimenting and praying for hope. It was all up to Usagi now and the raw, destructive power of the crystal.
Mamoru had only hesitated for a second before hitting Ceithin with a second blow, but each word had to be pulled from his lips with reluctance and regret.
Ceithin's children would stay mortal, there was nothing that could be done; when the Freeze came, unlike the Senshi, his children and their descendants would most likely perish. Ami had been trying to recreate the Senshi’s and Shitennou’s powers with the help of both Crystals for decades in the hope of extending their protection to the rest of the world's population, a vaccine of sorts to impending doom. She had not found a solution, but she had found an answer. The Senshi and Shitennou had inherited their abilities from the Silver Millennium, gifts which had been given in a lost time, gifts which only remained with them because of the sacrifice made by Princess Serenity’s mother. To even hope to replicate such power would require Usagi to share her mother’s fate, something beyond imagining for any of them.
They had truly lost, it seemed.
And he would have to tell Mina.
He kissed his daughter farewell at the alter, her happy tears leaving him unmoved, and handed her over to death.
~*~
The end of the world came much sooner than they had planned. Owain’s son had only become a year old the week before, Airi had just been promoted at work.
Perhaps it was a blessing that they were all together in the end. The Senshi stood with the Shitennou, dressed in uniform for the first time in decades, while people ran around screaming in fear and panic and despair. On sight of the warriors many stopped and began to pray to them, begging Usagi for salvation and safety. They wanted their homes and families back, they pleaded for life and Heaven to the fourteen men and women gifted with powers beyond imagination, but all Usagi could do was cry with them while her guardians tried as best they could to hold back the tides of destruction.
The ground below them cracked open down deep to the mantle, swallowing people and structures and the flooding salt waters of the furious oceans. Fires burned and melted and ate away civilisation; cliffs and sinkholes formed in seconds while mountains crumbled in the blink of an eye.
It had been Uranus who first tried to make Usagi see reason. Only the guardian of the Silver Crystal could awaken the true power of Sailor Saturn and end the world. It was up to the Moon Princess to save them.
But Usagi looked over to Mina, who was too busy clutching her grandson and crying with her daughter over the body of Peter to think of the destruction around them, and Usagi could not do it. She could not be the one to kill Mina’s children, she could not bring herself to sentence them to death with her own lips.
Ami and Jared tried, even Mamoru took her by the shoulders and shook the little blonde woman, as small as a child, and begged her to do it, to save those they could before they all perished.
But still Usagi looked over to Mina and couldn't, she stared into Owain's terrified face as he searched between his mother and father for the answer. She fell to her knees, hail stones of fire and ice raining down around them, and she begged through tears not to be forced to do it, to not be a murderer of innocents. They had been trying for years to think of something, there had to be another option.
Finally it was Ceithin who tilted up the Princess’ chin. It was Ceithin, ignoring his son's eyes and his grandson's wailing, who gave her the permission she so desperately needed, and the forgiveness she craved. He clutched at her shoulders, looking her in her light eyes and told her the truth. Do it now, he had said, or you'll be responsible for the end of all humanity. Save Earth.
Sailor Saturn brought forth her true and terrible power, and then Usagi enveloped the world in pristine crystal.
~*~
When Mina woke, it was to silence. She felt a weight on her chest and looked down to find her sleeping grandson curled on her, his hair just as chocolately as she remembered it, his little outfit the very same: a dark blue sweater with animal prints, a red collared shirt underneath. She breathed a deep sigh of relief, her lungs heaving out a stale and painful breath of air.
The baby disintegrated into a fine, shining dust.
~*~
As Mina stumbled away from the car wreck, her lip, cheek and forearms bloodied from the impact, she felt numb, for the first time since she’d awoken in Crystal Tokyo there was no pain, no sorrow, only nothingness. It was better than alcohol, it was better than drugs, it was better even than sex. All she had to do was hold onto the numbness and it would be alright.
The rain began to fall, a low rumble overhead signalling the impending storm. Already the flashing colour of the emergency services could be seen making their way over to her, but she didn’t care, she didn’t feel, she was going to be fine. Then she looked down to her hand, to the gentle weight of the golden locket, the sweet images of her family - her baby girl with Ceithin and her holding Owain - and then the numbness fell away to the bitter sharpness of pain.
She wept, wondering what it was all for.